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tiredmike59 · 05-29-2012, 10:55 PM

There once was a woman named Sue
Who made an unusual stew
She put in worms and beans
Snakes and sardines
I wouldn't eat it,would you ?

OH Nuts! · 05-29-2012, 11:09 PM

(Leave It To Beaver #2)

June June, the pearl-strapped mother
Has two sons she likes to smother
Thank God Ward can reign her in
With gentle advice and little din
But she still fusses like no other (oh brother!)

tiredmike59 · 05-29-2012, 11:57 PM

A man broke out of a jail
He couldn't come up with the bail
He didn't get far
And was back behind bars
Cops said he ran like a snail

OH Nuts! · 05-30-2012, 07:33 AM

(Leave It To Beaver #3)

Judy Hensler is a snitch
And a word that rhymes with ditch
She's always ratting out the class
All around her think she's crass
Were enemies currency, she'd be rich!

tiredmike59 · 05-30-2012, 11:56 AM

There once was a man in Perth
Who claimed not to be from Earth
He talked about Mars
And various stars
But could not show proof of his birth

tiredmike59 · 05-30-2012, 12:26 PM

A hypochondriac once said he was dying
He said things that people weren't buying
Like he had'nt been eating
And his heart wasn't beating
But they left cuz they knew he was lying

tiredmike59 · 05-30-2012, 01:23 PM

A man found a fly in his beer
He hollered, " What the hell's going on here? "
The bartender said,
" Don't worry,he's dead "
" He just fell out of my ear "

tiredmike59 · 05-30-2012, 02:47 PM

We were all sitting there drinkin
And soon I began to thinkin
A limerick would sound good
Don't know if I should
Since most of mine are downright stinkin

tiredmike59 · 05-30-2012, 07:51 PM

There once was a fellow named Brown
Who seemed to be all over town
He was a little guy
Only two inches high
And was always under some woman's gown.

OH Nuts! · 05-30-2012, 08:02 PM

I came upon a myopic bee
That mistook a flower for a tree
Although determined with drive
It couldn't seem to find its hive
And crested confused to a lea.

tiredmike59 · 05-30-2012, 10:05 PM

Two cops got into a fight
One didn't think it was right
That the doughnut he picked
The other cop licked
Preventing him from taking a bite

tiredmike59 · 05-30-2012, 10:07 PM

There once was a woman named Joan
Whose head was shaped like a bone
She couldn't go out
Dogs would follow her about
They just wouldn't leave her alone.

tiredmike59 · 05-30-2012, 10:09 PM

There once was a man named Pete
Who decided to wash his feet
They gave off a smell
Like something from hell
Similar to rancid meat.

tiredmike59 · 05-31-2012, 08:55 AM

A man found himself short on cash
So he decided to pick in the trash
He didn't get rich
But he started to itch
And soon developed a rash.

tiredmike59 · 05-31-2012, 10:43 AM

There once was a raccoon named Grady
Who walked up to a little old lady
She wanted to ask
Why he was wearing a mask
But was afraid because he looked kind of shady.

05-29-2012, 11:09 PM	#32
OH Nuts! WINGing it on a Sandpiper! Forum Idol Join Date: Feb 15, 2005 Posts: 121,856	(Leave It To Beaver #2) June June, the pearl-strapped mother Has two sons she likes to smother Thank God Ward can reign her in With gentle advice and little din But she still fusses like no other (oh brother!)
	__________________ Thank you SHOUT! & Antenna TV xxoo You both Rock!!

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05-29-2012, 10:55 PM	#31
tiredmike59 Member Senior Member Join Date: Jun 05, 2010 Location: OUTLAW STATE {MO} Posts: 1,863	There once was a woman named Sue Who made an unusual stew She put in worms and beans Snakes and sardines I wouldn't eat it,would you ?

05-29-2012, 11:57 PM	#33
tiredmike59 Member Senior Member Join Date: Jun 05, 2010 Location: OUTLAW STATE {MO} Posts: 1,863	A man broke out of a jail He couldn't come up with the bail He didn't get far And was back behind bars Cops said he ran like a snail

05-30-2012, 07:33 AM	#34
OH Nuts! WINGing it on a Sandpiper! Forum Idol Join Date: Feb 15, 2005 Posts: 121,856	(Leave It To Beaver #3) Judy Hensler is a snitch And a word that rhymes with ditch She's always ratting out the class All around her think she's crass Were enemies currency, she'd be rich!

05-30-2012, 11:56 AM	#35
tiredmike59 Member Senior Member Join Date: Jun 05, 2010 Location: OUTLAW STATE {MO} Posts: 1,863	There once was a man in Perth Who claimed not to be from Earth He talked about Mars And various stars But could not show proof of his birth

05-30-2012, 12:26 PM	#36
tiredmike59 Member Senior Member Join Date: Jun 05, 2010 Location: OUTLAW STATE {MO} Posts: 1,863	A hypochondriac once said he was dying He said things that people weren't buying Like he had'nt been eating And his heart wasn't beating But they left cuz they knew he was lying

05-30-2012, 01:23 PM	#37
tiredmike59 Member Senior Member Join Date: Jun 05, 2010 Location: OUTLAW STATE {MO} Posts: 1,863	A man found a fly in his beer He hollered, " What the hell's going on here? " The bartender said, " Don't worry,he's dead " " He just fell out of my ear "

05-30-2012, 02:47 PM	#38
tiredmike59 Member Senior Member Join Date: Jun 05, 2010 Location: OUTLAW STATE {MO} Posts: 1,863	We were all sitting there drinkin And soon I began to thinkin A limerick would sound good Don't know if I should Since most of mine are downright stinkin

05-30-2012, 07:51 PM	#39
tiredmike59 Member Senior Member Join Date: Jun 05, 2010 Location: OUTLAW STATE {MO} Posts: 1,863	There once was a fellow named Brown Who seemed to be all over town He was a little guy Only two inches high And was always under some woman's gown.

05-30-2012, 08:02 PM	#40
OH Nuts! WINGing it on a Sandpiper! Forum Idol Join Date: Feb 15, 2005 Posts: 121,856	I came upon a myopic bee That mistook a flower for a tree Although determined with drive It couldn't seem to find its hive And crested confused to a lea.

05-30-2012, 10:05 PM	#41
tiredmike59 Member Senior Member Join Date: Jun 05, 2010 Location: OUTLAW STATE {MO} Posts: 1,863	Two cops got into a fight One didn't think it was right That the doughnut he picked The other cop licked Preventing him from taking a bite

05-30-2012, 10:07 PM	#42
tiredmike59 Member Senior Member Join Date: Jun 05, 2010 Location: OUTLAW STATE {MO} Posts: 1,863	There once was a woman named Joan Whose head was shaped like a bone She couldn't go out Dogs would follow her about They just wouldn't leave her alone.

05-30-2012, 10:09 PM	#43
tiredmike59 Member Senior Member Join Date: Jun 05, 2010 Location: OUTLAW STATE {MO} Posts: 1,863	There once was a man named Pete Who decided to wash his feet They gave off a smell Like something from hell Similar to rancid meat.

05-31-2012, 08:55 AM	#44
tiredmike59 Member Senior Member Join Date: Jun 05, 2010 Location: OUTLAW STATE {MO} Posts: 1,863	A man found himself short on cash So he decided to pick in the trash He didn't get rich But he started to itch And soon developed a rash.

05-31-2012, 10:43 AM	#45
tiredmike59 Member Senior Member Join Date: Jun 05, 2010 Location: OUTLAW STATE {MO} Posts: 1,863	There once was a raccoon named Grady Who walked up to a little old lady She wanted to ask Why he was wearing a mask But was afraid because he looked kind of shady.