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Old 07-03-2012, 03:47 AM   #121
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A bear chased a man up a tree
Where a squirrel became mad as can be
You're being a pest
You're blocking my nest
And I have to get out to pee.
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Old 07-04-2012, 01:58 PM   #122
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There once was a dentist in Maine
Who promised there would be no pain
His patients were thrilled
Until they were billed
Then their butts needed some novocaine.
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Old 07-04-2012, 06:53 PM   #123
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There once was a puppet named Joan
Who learned how to speak on her own
She would talk all day
She had plenty to say
It was a shame she was always alone.
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Old 07-04-2012, 08:04 PM   #124
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A man had a fireworks craze
It was just one of those days
He was unable to handle
A Roman candle
And set his arse ablaze.
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Old 07-07-2012, 09:12 PM   #125
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There once was a woman in Wales
Who began to resemble the snails
She had tentacles and shell
Was as slimey as Hell
And wherever she went she left trails.
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Old 07-07-2012, 09:14 PM   #126
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The sirens are a blowin
But there's no way of knowin
If the twister's near
Or if it's here
So in the basement I'm a goin.
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Old 07-08-2012, 08:01 PM   #127
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There once was a boy who was four
Who decided to sneak out the door
He went outside
So he could hide
While his mom was mopping the floor

To be continued on next post.
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Old 07-08-2012, 08:03 PM   #128
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He had hidden behind a tree
Where he hoped no one could see
But his dog sniffed him out
With his powerful snout
And dragged him back in by his knee.
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Old 07-09-2012, 04:18 PM   #129
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The employees were excited this day
It was time to collect their pay
But the boss was reclusive
He was being elusive
He just wished they would go away.
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Old 07-09-2012, 08:30 PM   #130
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There once was a man from Tibet
Whose body never got wet
He was a dirty monk
And he sure stunk
Skunks smelled better I bet.
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Old 07-10-2012, 01:39 AM   #131
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There once was a guy named Cy
Whose tie got caught in his fly
He went to unzip
And it started to rip
Now his tie's four inches high.
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Old 07-10-2012, 08:28 PM   #132
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There once was a ghost named Ned
Who worried about something he read
" AT THE BREAK OF DAWN "
" THE WORLD WILL BE GONE "
Then he remembered he's already dead.
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Old 07-10-2012, 10:50 PM   #133
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There once was a beast called Godzilla
Who left Japan for Manilla
He was a giant pest
That made such a mess
And got chased by a Japanese flotilla.
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Old 07-11-2012, 04:04 PM   #134
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Granny was busy sewin
Her pants,so it wouldn't be showin
The hole in the back
That exposed her crack
And the cold draft she felt a blowin.
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Old 07-12-2012, 08:48 PM   #135
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The weatherman had lots to say
A hurricane was on the way
But it turned about
Then fizzled out
Now he hopes for another some day.
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