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Old 11-02-2019, 06:39 AM   #1
Frank Gannucci
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Default Honeymooners Episode Reviews: "Sun/Raccoon Capital", "People's Choice" & more:

Honeymooners Episode Reviews: "Sun/Raccoon Capital", "People's Choice" (both versions),", "Forgot To Register" & "The Deciding Vote":

In honor of Election Day, I thought I would post these reviews.

Episode #216 (Syndicated episode #45)
TV: Hour-long musical.
DVD: Attached to "The Honeymoon Is Over", "Happiness Is A Rich Uncle", & "Hawaii, Oh! Oh!" On the Best of Collection DVD, it is attached to “Be It Ever So Humble", "Two Faces Of Ralph Kramden" and "Double Trouble."
Air Date: 11/22/69

"Sun & Raccoon Capital of The World":
The episode opens up with dancers (June Taylor Dancers, of course) coming out and singing: “Miami Beach” in the Blue Philbin Hotel. After that, they leave. The Kramdens and Nortons arrive in Miami Beach. Ironically, I am sure you people know that these episodes were filmed in Miami Beach. They are staying at the finest hotel in Miami Beach, the Blue Philbin. Ed says that this hotel has entertainment for everything. The entertainment sounds…interesting. Alice: "We got to miss all of that entertainment just because they have tickets to see the Jackie Gleason Show." Ed: "I wanted to meet Johnny Olsen." They check in. Ed spots someone who is dressed in a rather ridiculous fashion. Since there are a lot of conventions that come to Miami Beach, he wonders what lodge he is from. Man: "None. I'm a policeman. I'm a plain clothes man." People are going whoooo-whooooing. They are people from the Raccoon Lodge that Ralph & Ed belong to. One of the Raccoons is the guy who played the arcade owner in "Play It Again, Norton." The girls turn their back as the boys do the Raccoon secret handshake which looks like they are playing "Patty cake" after which they go: "Whooo-whooo-whooo." Ralph introduces them as Red Courtney and Ace Fargo. Alice says that she would shake their hands but she is too old to play "Patty cake." Ace & Red are here for the Raccoon Convention. They are electing a Grand High Exalted Mystic Ruler. Red or Ace says that they knew that Ralph & Ed were coming so they brought their uniforms with them. Ralph: "Who would do such a nice thing?" Alice: "The squirrels might. They are crazy about nuts." The girls look at the pool. The only person who is running for the G.H.E.M.R. is Hampton Shelton IV. He has said that when he is elected, there will be no more beer drinking before, during and after the meetings. He wants to take out all the pool tables, ban the poker games and he wants to let the wives come to the meetings. Ralph: "Sounds like some kind of communist to me." If only from someone from their own lodge will run, then everything will be fine according to Ace or Red. Ralph says that the cost of running the campaign for the G.H.E.M.R. is expensive. It is $15. They suggest Ralph Kramden because he is now a Hollywood songwriter. Ralph accepts. He has Ace's, Red's & Ed's respective votes. Ralph wants to get the word out to tall the Raccoons in the area that he is running. As soon as he sets up his headquarters, there will be free beer for everyone. They all try to leave. Hampton comes in all drunk. Ace or Red says that it is just to make the Raccoons think that he is a regular guy. Ed: "He is trying to build up a decent image." Ralph says that they have to fight fire with fire. So, they act drunk.

At Ralph's campaign headquarters; there are a lot of posters praising Ralph. A lot of beer is set up. Shelton just got nominated according to Ed. Shelton then fell off the platform. Ed: "There is no better way to get to a Raccoon's heart than to pass out in front of 5,000 of them." Ed tells all the Raccoons to tell them what is going on in here. Ralph is trying to get into his uniform…his pants are too big. In the storyline, (and Jackie in real life, of course) he lost weight. Ralph: "If I go out in these, I will be a laughing stock." Ed: "If you don't, you will get a few laughs too." Ralph goes to put on his regular pants. Ed spots a poster of Ralph that according to him looks like it is falling apart. Ed pulls it off to reveal a Richard Nixon poster that gets a lot of laughs and applause. Ed: "I wonder if this guy got elected to his lodge." Ralph says that with all of his campaign expenses, his half comes to $40. Ed complains since Ralph is the one getting all the benefits and not him. One of the benefits is an unlimited expense account up to $5 and another one is to drive the Raccoon mobile. Ed: "What am I going to get out of all this?" Ralph: "You are my special assistant. You will be there where all the big decisions are made. You will be there for all the top-level meetings. You will be in all the smoke-filled rooms." Ed: "Big deal. I work in the sewer all day and then at night, I have to sit in a smoke-filled room." Ralph demands the $40. Ed gives it to him. Ed asks if he can drive the Raccoon mobile because according to Ed, if he is wearing Ralph's big pants, no one will know the difference. No deal. Hampton comes in and drinks some of the beer and stumbles out like a drunk. Ed helps Ralph out with his nomination speech. Ed (reading) "`Fellow Raccoons, we are on the threshold of a new era. There are two candidates running: Hampton Shelton IV and Ralph Kramden. One represents the past. The other, the future. Would you like to go back to the dark ages with Hampton Shelton IV or would you like to zoom into the space age with Ralph Kramden? Would you rather be mired in the mud or would you rather shoot to the heights? Would you rather swing on a star be better of than you are…" Ralph (yells): "WAIT A MINUTE!" Ed said that he just got carried away. Ralph: "You make that speech and you will be carried away all right. Just say my good points." Ed: "Then it will be the shortest speech on record." Ed sits down to write down what Ralph will dictate. Ralph: "Brother Raccoons, Ralph Kramden promises you…promises you…read that back to me." Ed does. Ed: "Ralph Kramden promises you…promises you four pairs of Fruit of The Loom shorts." You see, Ed wrote his speech for Ralph on his record for the Income Tax. New speech. Ralph: "`Brother Raccoons, I recommend moderation. Moderation in all things. What do I mean by moderation? A little common sense. A little dignity. A little gambling. A little booze…'" Ed says that that is better than any other speech that Mussolini could ever write. Some Raccoons, along with Ace & Red come in. It's almost time for him to say Ralph's speech. Ed and some Raccoons leave. The rest of the Raccoons, sans Ralph have beer and then they sing: "I Will Be The Greatest Of All The Raccoons." After that, some of the Raccoons leave. Ed comes in. Ed says that he made such a great speech that they also nominated him.

At the hotel pool, some girls in their bathing suits (I think that they were Glea Girls) go back inside the hotel. Ralph & Alice come out. Alice wants them to sit in the sun even though Ralph is wearing pants and a collared shirt. Ralph is upset that he thinks that Ed turned his back on him by running against him and he is ungrateful since he let him in the Raccoons. Ralph is trying to set up a folding chair but he is having "trouble" doing so. You can tell that he is grabbing BOTH of the bottom ends of the chair with the top facing upward so it's impossible for him to set it up if he is holding it that way. Ed comes out all smiles, grabs a chair and has no trouble setting it up. He sits down. Ralph tells him to get up so that Alice can sit down. Ed grabs another chair and has no trouble setting it up. He sits down. Ralph tells him to get up so that he can sit in that chair. Ed does. Ed grabs another chair and the same thing happens, only this time Ralph doesn't tell him to get up. Alice is upset. They got her so nervous with that chair thing that she is leaving to go to the beach. She leaves. A bellhop comes with a telephone call for Ed. That must be one real long phone cord (either that, or they got an extension cord). Ed takes the call. Ed: "You found out that I was being nominated for Grand High Auxial-Auxila-Exalted…You got me so excited." I think Art slightly flubbed his line there. Ed thanks him for his support and hangs up. Ed: "I didn't know that Spiro Agnew was a Raccoon." Ed asks Ralph if he is mad at him. Ralph says yes of course. Ed then rehearses his speech that he is going to give at the convention tonight. Ralph says that he will not make any speech because he is heartbroken. He doesn't care about the G.H.E.M.R occupation. It's their friendship. According to Ralph, if Ed runs against him, twenty years of their friendship will go down the drain. I thought that Ralph once said in "A Little Man Who Wasn't There" that they were friends ever since they were kids. Ralph: "When one was broke, the other one lent them the money." Ed: "But I was always the other one." Ralph: "That is why you need my friendship." Ralph begs Ed not to read the speech Ed accepts. Ralph reads it and it says: "I Ed Norton, because of my great friendship to Ralph Kramden, withdraw from the race and I put all my support behind him." Uh oh! Ed will not read the speech now despite the fact that now Ralph wants him to read that speech. The girls come back as the boys are arguing. Trixie is wearing a gold outfit that almost COMPLETELY covers her body along with a gold hat. How is she supposed to get a tan in that? Ed explains everything that is going on. Ralph: "You are not qualified to run because you are too DUMB that's why." Wow, what a friend. Trixie gets in Ralph's face. Soon, the wives are now having a fight over whose husband is going to win in the election. They all sing: "That's Me." A song about who will win the G.H.E.M.R. Ralph & Ed leave in the middle of the song. After the song, the girls actually apologize to each other. Then they leave. I should also mention that all this time, the rest of the patrons around the Kramdens & Nortons said nothing.

Ralph's campaign headquarters is now split. Ralph's side is on the left and Ed's side is on the right. There is a line that separates the side. A line that cuts one of Ralph's posters in half. Ed's side has his campaign posters. Ed changes the sign that says: "Kramden On The Go" to "Kramden The Goon." A Charlie the Raccoon comes in with some girls to do some campaigning for Ed. The girls I think were Glea Girls (one of them is wearing a red sweater and gets some male wolf whistles from the crowd.) The other one is a fat old lady. Ed says that when she sees his wife, hide the poster or according to Ed, she will think that she and he are fooling around. Ralph comes in and wonders what is going on. Ed tells him. He says that since he contributed to half of Ralph's campaign expenses, he gets half the room and if Ralph wants to pass, he has to pay a slight toll charge of fifty cents. Ralph says that if Ed wants to wash his hands using the sink that is on his half of the room, it will cost him $1. Ed: "I can wash just one hand for fifty cents." They fight. Jim Knight from The Sunday Evening Raccoon Newspaper comes in along with Ace or Red. Ed said that he enjoyed reading Jim's editorial called "Should Red China Be Admitted To The Raccoons?" Jim is doing a story about the Raccoons running and he would like to have stories on Hampton, Ed & Ralph. Ralph says that he will be elected on the first ballot while Ed says that he hopes Red China will be admitted to the Raccoons. Time for Jim to get the background information Ralph says that he dropped out of school after he graduated the eighth grade. If that was possible, how can he be a bus driver? He was a bodyguard for the local church parish (he guarded the winners after they walked home from the bingo game.) Ed said that his birth certificate says that he was born in Brooklyn, but he says that he actually was born on at sea. Right in Cotter's Shawls. Ralph wants to change the way he was born. Ed leaves with Jim to get pictures of him. Ralph goes over the line. Ed: "That will cost you fifty cents." Ralph (holding up a fist): "Do you have change of this?" Ace or Red explains to Ralph that since Ed was born on Cotter's Shawl's, he was born 7 miles off shore. According to Section 6, paragraph 34 of the Raccoon by-laws, since Ed was born more than three miles off shore, he is not a US citizen. Wow! So, that means he can't be a G.H.E.M.R. (Also according to the by-laws, in order to become G.H.E.M.R., the person must have a 4th grade education or have passed an equivalency test.) This could knock Ed out of the race. According to Ace or Red, a mean candidate who is running against him would expose Ed's status and knock him out. Ace or Red leaves. Ralph sings a song about his problem while scary music plays. Ralph the Angel tells him to not tell the information while Ralph the Devil tells him to do it.

At the convention, Ed Norton speaks first. His speech includes him saying that the governor of Florida and the mayor of Miami Beach are in the audience. He also makes a reference to Tamiami Trail. Since I now live in Florida, I can safely say that I live close to that street and can say that it is (or was) a street that went from Miami to Tampa. After greeting everybody, he says that he is speechless. It's time for Ralph's speech. Ed blows a noise in Ralph's ear to antagonize him. Ralph: "I said it before and I will say it again. Raccoon audiences are the BEST." He says that he will not read the speech he prepared but he will now read the information that he feels that every Raccoon should know before they cast their ballots. He tells them that it consists of one of the candidates that are running for the G.H.E.M.R. office. Ralph asks Ed to stand beside him. Ralph says that they have been friends for a long time and all the good things they do together. Ed praises Ralph. Ralph & Ed try to convince everyone that the Raccoons are more important than their friendship. Ed says that Ralph is the only real friend that he has ever had in his life. Ralph. Ed says that he loves Ralph. He hugs him. Ralph says that one of the candidates is not qualified to run, but he doesn't say who. He withdraws from the race in exchange for his friendship with Ed. Ed withdraws his vote, so that means that Hampton Shelton IV who falls down in his seat completely drunk. The Kramdens & Nortons sing the Raccoon Alma Mater which goes: "From the hallowed streets of Greenpernt, to the shores of Sheepshead Bay, From the Verrazano Narrows, To Canarsie across the way...We have come together, one and all, in fellowship to commune, And to glorify the Grand Exalted Brotherhood of Raccoons."

At the curtain call, Jackie praises the Miami Beach audience and says good night. During the curtain call, Johnny Olsen plugs the next episode of the Color Honeymooners which stars Frances Langford. The episode is called: "The Match Game."

Episode #192 (Syndicated episode #21)
TV: One hour (edited.)
DVD: Attached to "Be It Ever So Humble", "Hair To A Fortune" & "Two For The Money."
Color & Lost Episode Title: "The People's Choice":
Air Date: 9/23/57

"The People's Choice" (Color):

This is an episode that has the same title as its Lost episode counterpart. For most of the color remakes, they gave the color one a different title.

In the Nick Clooney intro for this episode on AmericanLife TV (now Youtoo America), Nick says that Ralph Kramden is the most enduring role that Jackie ever played and then says all the other regular characters that he ever played but he gets stumped. Nick: "Then there's Fenwick...something Fenwick. Anyway, a question unanswered." I know the answer: Fenwick

At the Brooklyn Bus Station, a guy is holding the front page of the Daily Star Newspaper with Ralph Kramden’s photo with the headline stating: “Knuckles Grogan Captured.” Apparently, the paper was only 10 cents. Today, it would probably cost a lot more. The June Taylor Dancers sing: “Extra! Extra! Read All About It.” After that, they leave. Ralph & Ed leave the Brooklyn Police Station. Ralph has just captured "Knuckles" Grogan. In reality, “Knuckles” Grogan was a person that Gleason knew and he worked with him. A bunch of reporters and other people are surrounding Ralph and Ed. A reporter asks how Ralph spotted Grogan. Ralph: "I was having my lunch and a guy came towards me. He looked familiar." Ed: "That was me. I was meeting him for lunch." Ralph: "I was having a pastrami sandwich that was wrapped in a newspaper." Ed: "It was mine. We traded sandwiches." Ralph: "I looked at the newspaper and saw a guy that looked familiar. He had a moustache. Then, I realized that it was a piece of pastrami that was stuck to his upper lip. I brushed that away. Then, I realized it was Grogan and the person coming toward me was Grogan. So I hollered for a cop." The reporter asks Ralph about the threat that Grogan that he made. He said he was going to take care of the guy who put the finger on him. Ralph is scared. The reporter says that they are going to put "Knuckles" away for keeps. Ralph is relieved. Ralph: "He is never going to scare me." The reporter asks Ed for a statement for Ralph. Ed: "I'm very happy to be here today because this means I won't have to work for the rest of the day down in the sewer." Ed's statement also includes weather as a reason why he can't work for the rest of the day. Ralph's isn't amused. A photographer asks Ralph to take a picture of him, the commissioner and the chief. Gunshots are heard. "Knuckles" has escaped. Ralph is so scared. Ed tries to help Ralph. He gets Ralph home.

Ralph is asking Alice where she put the key to the front door. Alice has misplaced it. Alice says that the police are watching this building and Ralph is protected. Ralph isn't confident with the police watching him. He doesn't trust them. So, Ralph tries to barricade the door with furniture much in the same way he did in "The Prowler." Ed opens the front door with no problem (since the door opens from the inside). Ralph is upset that his plan isn't going to work, according to him. Ed tries to help Ralph by saying that he won't be killed. Ralph asks if Ed saw anybody suspicious. Ed says that he has and that person has been looking at the Kramdens kitchen window for three hours. It's Murphy The Undertaker. Ralph says that he can't lock the door because there is no latch, so he is a sitting duck. Ralph looks outside the window as Ed blows air into his paper bag and pops it. Ralph thinks that he has been shot and screams in pain. When he realizes what Ed did, he gets mad at Ed. Alice wonders what was that noise. Ralph: "Babyhead (Ed) had to break a paper bag." Ed says that he has a disguise for Ralph. Ralph has a choice: A nanny goat (sp?) or a pussycat. Ed recommends a nanny goat and he goes upstairs to get it. Ralph blames Alice for this. A knock is heard. It's the policemen. They hatch a plan. Alice goes in the hallway. Ralph will wait in the kitchen and the policemen will hide in the bedroom and they will catch "Knuckles" when Ralph says: "Knuckles, it's you.” They say if they try to catch "Knuckles" outside, an innocent bystander might get hurt. Ralph waits in the kitchen and the policemen and Alice wait in the bedroom. When "Knuckles" arrives, Ralph gets tongue-tied. Ed comes in and yells: "KNUCKLES, IT'S YOU." The policemen nab "Knuckles." and leave. Ralph is so shocked that he keeps on saying "Kna-kna-kna-kna-kna-kna-kna-kna!" The reporters come by to question Ralph and Ed. Ed tries to answer, but Ralph says that he captured him. Typical Ralph. Ralph & Ed sing a false story about Ralph capturing "Knuckles." Ed's lyrics include: "Where was I?/Where was I?" I think the song is called: "I Wouldn't Miss This For The World."

The next week, Ralph is working on his scrapbook. He's been patting himself on the back. Alice comes in with every newspaper that she could find that has Ralph's picture on the front page. Alice says that Ralph should come back down to earth. The neighbors now say that he's swellheaded. Ralph says that the neighbors are jealous because they didn't capture a killer or get some other good things like being in the audience on the Ed Sullivan Show. Ralph: "I'm a hero. A hero. Do you know what that is?" Alice: "Yeah, it's a fat sandwich." Ha! Ralph: "Just for that Alice, when I buy a wallet, I am not buying you Howard Duff's picture." I wonder if Howard Duff is related to Hilary Duff. Ralph is going to show Ed the pictures. Ralph leaves. Mr. Miller and Mr. Weaver come in. They ask for Ralph. Alice gets Ralph. The men unveil their devious plan. They want to make Ralph their next candidate for the state assembly. The reason? The only thing you need to win is votes. Ralph is going to be a natural according to one of them. Mr. Miller says he read some of Ralph's interviews and says that he doesn't sound to smart. Mr. Weaver: "That is what we want. A stupid hero. Once he gets in, then we can control him." Ralph comes down and greets the two men. They heard that since Ralph captured "Knuckles", he has shown to be a fearless citizen. Oh boy! He is just the person that they need for their party. They want Ralph to run for assembly. Ralph doesn't know what to think. Mr. Weaver: "After Assembly, who knows? You may become Senator, Governor, maybe even President." Mr. Weaver says that just because Ralph is a bus driver, that shouldn't ruin his chances of becoming an Assemblyman. If Ralph is elected, they will help him out. Ralph says that he will run. They leave. Ed comes in and Ralph tells him what Mr. Miller and Mr. Weaver said to him about being an Assemblyman. Ed: "Maybe if you liked peanut butter and jelly and I liked pastrami, maybe I could have become President." Alice comes in. Ed (to Alice): "There lies the next President of the U.S." Ha! Ralph is upset that Ed told Alice the good news. Ed leaves. Ralph tries to explain to Alice so she won't think that he's nuts. Alice says that she doesn't think that Ralph is nuts about thinking about running for president. Ralph says that this president stuff is way in the future and now he's running for assemblyman. Ralph mentions to Alice what Mr. Miller and Mr. Weaver came in and what they told Ralph. Alice says: "If you become elected, what do you know about running for Assembly?" Ralph says that the two will help him. Alice is even more against him running. Alice then says that if Ralph gets elected, Ralph will be controlled by them and will become a stooge. Alice: "You will be an even bigger crook than they are." Ralph disagrees. Ralph & Alice sing: "The Country Needs A Man Like Me."

The whole gang comes marching down the street. Alice has the cymbals, Trixie is carrying a sign praising Ralph and Ed is playing the big drum that he is wearing. You know if I was Ralph in this situation, I think I would be SLIGHTLY EMBARRASSED. Ralph is wearing a cowboy hat and boots while Ed is dressed like George Washington. Ralph says that he is dressed to look like the Governor of California. I wonder what Arnold Schwarzenegger would think if he saw Ralph Kramden dressed like that. Ralph may have been making a reference to Ronald Reagan when he said that line. Alice thinks that this is a bad idea. Ralph says that Ed is dressed like George Washington. Ed: "I thought I was dressed like Arron Burke. (sp?)." Ralph practices his campaign song with Ed beating the drum. Ralph's song: "Harvey Porter Is A Bum-bum-bum!" The whole song basically insults Harvey. What a way to NOT get votes. After they are done, Ralph orders Alice to go to the movie theatre and Trixie to go to the bowling alley and instruct the people to come meet Ralph. They leave. Ralph sets up a crate so Ralph can stand on. Ed beats the drums. Ralph tries to greet himself to another man who was walking by, but due to Ed beating the drums, the man can't hear Ralph and leaves. Ralph is upset. He instructs Ed to beat the drum to collect the crowd so he can greet himself. A couple of newlyweds walk by as Ralph is trying to sell himself. They don't pay attention. Ralph (to the man): "She won't be such a riot after you marry her." Gee, that's so not earning him brownie points. Ralph doesn't know what to do. Ed says that all they have to do is remember Ralph's initials. Ralph says that his middle name is "Francis." Which means that his initials are R.F.K. Ed suggests that Ralph make a slogan. Ralph already has one: "Vote For The Man That Captured 'Knuckles' Grogan." An old lady comes by; she doesn't pay attention to Ralph. Ralph (to the lady): "Keep the Faith baby!" Ralph is upset. Alice comes back and is freezing. Ralph is upset at Alice. Ed goes down to the theatre. He leaves. Alice wants to go home. Mr. Miller and Mr. Weaver come by just as Ralph reluctantly bangs Alice's cymbals. They call Ralph and idiot for doing what he's doing and they order him to read the speech they have made for him to read at the high school rally. They leave Ralph says that he is running. Alice sings: "The Country Does Not Need A Man Like You."

There is an edit during this scene. I think it happened when Mr. Miller & Mr. Weaver talked to Ralph. Here is a description from honeymooners.net's old Message Board from 2005: "There is what appears to be a brief edit in the scene. I suspect that there was probably a Robert F. Kennedy joke here which, given the tragic way in which RFK died, was cut from the program (either in its syndication run or by the folks at GoodLife/AmericanLife). The MPI DVD release doesn’t have this joke either indicating that CBS edited that joke out before it aired in reruns during the 60s.

At the rally, a moving platform has Mr. Miller, Mr. Weaver, the Kramdens & Nortons and a bunch of other people on it. Mr. Miller introduces Ralph. Alice is also introduced. Ed Norton is also introduced as well as his wife. As Ralph is reading the speech that is a pack of lies, Alice leaves. Ralph regains his senses and yells at Mr. Miller and Mr. Weaver to get off the stage. He denounces both of them as friends and reveals the truth about them. He praises Harvey and says that everyone should vote for him and Election time is a good time in America. Alice: "Now you are a hero." Ralph hugs and kisses Alice.

At the curtain call, Jackie has his cup of coffee in his hand. Jackie introduces 200 of the U.S. Servicemen sitting in the front row. Jackie introduces the whole cast and when he introduces Jean Kean, she makes him spill a little bit of his coffee. Jackie says goodnight to everyone.

Episode #150 (Syndicated episode #69)
TV: Attached to "Halloween Party."
VCR: Attached to "Honeymooners Christmas Party."
DVD: Attached to "Honeymooners Christmas Party", "Champagne & Caviar" & "Finger Man." On the Lost Episodes Restored Box Set, it is attached to "Boys & Girls Together", "Principal of The Thing", ""Songs & Witty Sayings", "Letter To The Boss" ('55 version), "Stand-In For Murder" ('55 version), "Double Anniversary Party" & "Check-Up."
Air Date: 10/27/56

"Forgot To Register":

Alice is in the kitchen. All of a sudden a big parade marches on Chauncey Street. It's Harper Vs. Penrose in a local election. One guy in the parade (probably it is Frank Marth’s voice) says: "VOTE FOR PENROSE! WALTER PENROSE FOR ASSEMBLY!" Trixie comes down and sees the parade with Alice. Ralph and Ed are involved in the festivities too. They are voting for Penrose. Trixie tries to get Ed's attention, but she can't. The parade ends. The girls talk about how much time the boys have been campaigning for Penrose. They are planning to vote tonight so they will al go together. Trixie leaves. Alice goes into the bedroom.

Ralph & Ed come in. Ed is dressed as Uncle Sam. Ed walked up to one guy and said: "Uncle Sam wants you." Ralph talks about Penrose. He says if he wins, Penrose has him and Ed to thank. Ralph mentions all the "influential" groups that are voting for him. The bowling alley, the pool hall etc. Ralph: "Who's voting against him? The teacher's association." Ralph mentions other groups that sound like they are important that are against him. Ed: "Who are they? Who are they?" Gee, sounds like all the important groups hate Penrose and all the other "influential" groups like him. Ralph mentions that when the parade went by the pool room, everyone came out but Ed said that could have been because of the fact that the noise was drowning out the race results. After all the work that Ralph & Ed did for Penrose, Ed says that he isn't going to vote because it's too much trouble. Ralph mentions when the pilgrims came to America, they went through a lot of trouble just to let you vote. Ed: "If they knew about me, they would saved themselves the trip. They had a similar argument in "The People's Choice." Ralph says that Ed is voting tonight and as Ed leaves, he asks Ralph a dumb question. Ralph kicks him out.

Alice comes in. Ralph mentions the fact that when he was at the pizzeria, he asked the people to spell on their anchovy pizzas with anchovies: "Vote For Penrose." Question: Given the size of anchovies, how could anyone do that? Ralph asks Alice when they vote tonight to wear the "Vote For Penrose" pin. Alice says that she can't because she's voting for Harper. D'oh! Not something that Ralph wanted to hear. Ralph argues with Alice for voting for Harper and says that the wife must vote for the same person as the husband. They talk about what each candidate has done and promised to do. According to Alice, Harper has promised to clean out all the slums. Ralph: "You are going to vote for man who's going to take away our home?" Ralph mentions that Penrose is going to promise to take the garbage out more times. They continue to talk about the good things that each candidate has done. Ralph said that Penrose was responsible for the new paint job on a school. Ralph: "He ordered that 14 coats be put on that school and he had his company do it." Coming from a person who has had a painting job once in his lifetime, I can say that 14 coats of a new paint job on anything is 12 coats too many. Ralph: "Harper is not for people like us. Penrose is for the little man and that's what I am Alice. I am a little man. Don't you dare say it." Trixie comes in and mentions that one lady can't vote because she forgot to register. Ralph remembers that he forgot to register and explains it to Alice. He apologizes for the argument and says that Alice should vote for anyone she wants. The episode ends and judging by the fact that Ralph and Ed continue to live in their apartment in later episodes, I guess we are supposed to believe that either Penrose won or Harper won and didn't eliminate the 328 Chauncey Street building.

Episode #119 (Syndicated Episode #11)
TV: Half-hour.
VCR: Attached to "Unconventional Behavior." On some tapes, it is attached to "Hello Mom." On some tapes, it is attached to "Better Living Through TV”, “Brother Ralph”, “Pal O’ Mine” & "Hello Mom."
Laserdisc: Attached to “TV or Not TV”, “Funny Money”, “The Golfer”, “Better Living Through TV”, “Brother Ralph”, “Pal O’ Mine”, “A Woman’s Work Is Never Done”, “Something Fishy”, “The Worry Wart”, “The Sleepwalker”, “Hello Mom”, “’Twas The Night Before Xmas” & “Man From Space.”
DVD: Attached to episodes #9-16 of the classic 39. The HD Blu-Ray set has the exact same episodes (including two versions of "Hello Mom." in which one has the original ads) and includes Best Buick Yet presentation.
Air Date: 12/10/55
To see the script for this episode, click here:http://www.springfieldspringfield.co...episode=s04e11

"The Deciding Vote":

Alice is doing some ironing. It's around anniversary time for the Kramdens. Ed comes down and wishes them a "Happy Anniversary." He tastes what he thinks is icing and wishes that Trixie would make icing that tastes as good as this. Alice: "Icing? Ed, that's starch." Ed: "I still wish that Trixie would make icing that tastes as good as this." Ralph comes home with a present that he claims that he thinks Alice wants: an old second-hand vacuum cleaner. Wow! That is so not what Alice needs. After Ralph goes over all the attachments, Alice says for the most part, they don't need it. To prove that it works, Ralph instructs Ed to put some dry oatmeal on the floor and the vacuum will pick it up. Not only does it not pick it up, Ralph has to hit it to work. Alice: "This (the vacuum) is nothing but a piece of junk." Ralph looks into the vacuum tube and sees there's a piece of gum in there. He tries to blow it out with his mouth. Ed: "You’re doing it the hard way." Ed turns on the vacuum cleaner and not only does Ralph's lips get stuck, he now has a PRICELESS look on his face and the audience laughs. He motions Ed to turn off the vacuum. Ed: "Accidents will happen." Ralph: "And you're the biggest accident that will ever happen." He throws Ed out.

Later that night, Alice is weeping up dirt. Alice (sarcastically): "There's no getting around it Ralph. Having a vacuum cleaner sure lightens my housework." Ralph's friend from the Raccoon Lodge, Joe Munsey comes by and says that Ralph is a lock to beat Frank McGuillicuddy in the Convention Manager nomination. With being the Convention Manager, the manager can go to Chicago (the place where the convention takes place that year) for free, and getting a car to drive around in while there. Joe rounds off all the people that will vote for Ralph and says that Ed has the deciding vote (hence the title of this episode). Ralph is nervous because him and Ed just had a fight but is confident that he and Ed can patch things up quickly. He calls Ed down, but Ed doesn't respond. He went bowling with Frank McGuillicuddy. Joe looks at the vacuum cleaner and Ralph says that Jim can use it for Joe's wife.

At the Raccoon Bensonhurst headquarters, Ed is socializing with Frank. Ralph comes by and he and Ed are still not speaking to each other. Ralph: How about the time where we were playing softball and you got hit in the head with a baseball bat? Who got you a cab and took you over to the hospital? I did. Who came up and saw you everyday? I did. Who got you cigarettes and candy? I did." Ed: "Who hit me in the head with the bat? You did." Oh boy! Ralph says that Ed always brings up the bad points and never the good points. The meeting starts and Ed gives out the pieces of paper for the people to write the name of the person that they are voting for. The end result is 4 for Frank and 3 for Kramden. The meeting is adjourned. Frank (to Ed): "You sure are a pal Norton." Ralph is upset. He thinks that Ed did him in.

The next day, Trixie comes down to talk to Alice. She leaves a reference for Ralph to fill out so they can get new furniture. She leaves. Ralph is still upset. So upset that when Trixie comes down to talk to Alice, he throws her out. He is remorseful for kicking her out and he says that will forgive Norton but when he sees the reference, his anger towards Norton resumes. He turns on the water and makes sure it keeps running by taking the faucet handle of the kitchen faucet to make sure Ed doesn't get any water for his bath. (The water runs bad in the building.) He fills out the reference: "'How long have you known the applicant?' Too long. 'Do you consider the applicant trustworthy?' Don't make me laugh. 'In you opinion, is the applicant a good character?' The applicant is a BUM!" He goes out to mail the reference just as Ed comes down to confront Ralph. Ralph leaves. Ed fixes the kitchen faucet. Alice is upset that Ed didn't vote for Ralph. Ed says that he did and he doesn't even know how to spell Frank's last name. Alice: "Why didn't you tell Ralph?" Ed says that he didn't because he has pride and if Ralph thinks he did that, let him and if he wants to call him names, let him. Ralph comes by and gets the real story. Ralph: "If you didn't vote against me, who did?" Ed: "Joe Rumsey." Rumsey? Turns out that Art either mispronounced Munsey or forgot that that was Joe's last name. Jackie even starts to say that that's Joe's last name. Ralph: "Why would Joe vote against me?" Ed: "Remember the vacuum you loaned to him? Jim tested it. He didn't do well with the oatmeal test either. Ralph apologizes and now is worried since he mailed the application and on it, he practically says Ed is a crook and that he won't get the furniture now. Ed isn't steamed. Why? The Kramdens were supposed to get the furniture as an anniversary gift, not the Nortons. D'oh! Not something the Kramdens wanted to hear.

Episode #85 (Syndicated episode #56/57)
TV: In two parts.
VCR: Attached to "What's The Name?"
DVD: Attached to "Hero" & "Two Tickets To The Fight." On The Lost Episodes DVD Box Set, it is attached to "Ralph's Sweet Tooth", "Game Called On Account of Marriage," "Love Letter" ('54 version) & "Battle of The Sexes."
Color & Lost Episode Title: "The People's Choice":
Air Date: 10/23/54

"The People's Choice":

When this episode was remade as a Color Honeymooners episode, they didn't bother to rename it. Usually when an episode is remade as a Color Honeymooners episode, it's retitled.

This is an expanded version of "Finger Man."

Ed comes in and says he is thinking about getting a present for a fellow sewer worker who's retiring. He suggested getting his boots bronzed. Oh boy! Alice says that is not a good gift for Ralph. Ralph comes home and tells the good news. He trapped a killer named "Bullets" Durgom. In reality, Bullets Durgom was a friend of Gleason’s and worked with him. Alice: "You trapped a killer? Weren't you scared?" Ed: "Any person who drives a bus in New York traffic ain't afraid of nothing."

The policemen come by along with reporters. Ed asks the police chief: "Are those Dick Tracy stories taken from real police files?" Ralph: "Why are you bothering him asking questions like that for? Of course they are." Typical Ralph. Ralph and the police chief's picture gets taken when all of a sudden, there's news that "Bullets" has escaped. And he is out to get whoever put the finger on him. D'oh! Not something Ralph wants to hear.

The policeman and reporters leave. Everyone gets worried about Ralph's safety. Ed: "He isn't going to come up here and kill you. He's going to wait in the night and see you at night and then he will kill you." Ralph: "Will you leave me alone?" Alice says that Ralph should go outside and ask a policeman for some help. He does but comes back a few seconds later saying: "Are you nuts? Sending me outside knowing that I could get killed." Ed says that Ralph should hide out in his Uncle's place in New Jersey. He will never find him there because Ed's been down there a few times and he couldn't find his Uncle's place himself. Ed also suggests that he will get his sailor's costume. He will never recognize him in that. He leaves. A knock is heard. Ralph wants to hide. It's the policemen. They hatch a plan. Ralph will wait in the kitchen and the policemen and Alice will hide in the bedroom and they will catch "Bullets" when Ralph says: "Bullets, it's you.” They say if they try to catch "Bullets" outside, an innocent bystander might get hurt. Ralph waits in the kitchen and the policemen and Alice wait in the bedroom. When "Bullets" arrives, Ralph gets tongue-tied. Ed comes in and yells: "BULLETS, IT'S YOU." The policemen nab "Bullets." and leave Ed also leaves. Ralph all during this time is saying: "Ba ba."

The next week, Ralph is working on his scrapbook. He's been patting himself on the back. Alice comes in with every newspaper that she could find that has Ralph's picture on the front page. Ralph is elated until he finds out that Alice got a newspaper with a horse on the front page. Alice says that the picture of the horse fooled her. Ha! Alice says that Ralph should come back down to earth. Ralph has been staying at home all week, patting himself on the back. The neighbors now say that he's swellheaded. Ralph says that the neighbors a re jealous because they didn't capture a killer or get some other good things like being in the audience on the Ed Sullivan Show. Ralph: "I'm a hero. A hero. A heeero. Do you know what that is?" Alice: "Yeah, it's a fat sandwich that is full of baloney." Ha! Alice leaves.

Mr. Morgan and Mr. Weaver come in. They heard that since Ralph captured "Bullets", he has shown to be a fearless citizen. Oh boy! He is just the person that they need for their party. They want Ralph to run for assembly. Ralph doesn't know what to think. Mr. Morgan: "After Assembly, who knows? You may become Senator Governor, maybe even President." Mr. Morgan says that just because Ralph is a bus driver, that shouldn't ruin his chances of becoming an Assemblyman. If Ralph is elected, they will help him out. Ralph says that he will run. They leave.

Ed comes in and Ralph tells him what Mr. Morgan and Mr. Weaver said to him about being an Assemblyman. Ed: "Maybe if a crook falls down the sewer, maybe I can become President." Alice comes in. Ed (to Alice): "There lies the next President of the U.S." Ha! Ralph is upset that Ed told Alice the good news. Ed leaves. Ralph tries to explain to Alice so she won't think that he's nuts. Alice says that she doesn't think that Ralph is nuts about thinking about running for president. She mentions some other ideas that Ralph had like becoming the manager of the next world's heavyweight champion in boxing and him and Ed going to Long Island to dig up Captain Kidd's treasure Boy, I would have loved to see a full thirty or two part episode of Ralph and Ed doing the latter. Ralph says that this president stuff is way in the future and now he's running for assemblyman. Ralph mentions to Alice what Mr. Morgan and Mr. Weaver came in and what they told Ralph. Alice says: "If you become elected, what do you know about running for Assembly?" Ralph says that the tow will help him. Alice is even more against him running. Alice talks about a story about another guy becoming elected and after that, the city suffered a big treasury loss. Ed Norton comes back in with a great idea on how to save on campaign money. His idea? Get all the Dewey buttons they can find and erase the mustache. Ralph kicks Ed out. Ralph says that he's an assemblyman and that Ed Norton will kill him before the campaign. I wonder how the campaign buttons would have looked, if they erased Dewey's mustache.

The whole gang comes marching down the street. Alice has the cymbals and Ed is playing the big drum that he is wearing. You know if I was Ralph in this situation, I think I would be SLIGHTLY EMBARRASSED. Ralph says that doing this would get him some votes. Alice laughs because with that drum on Ed, Ed looks almost as fat as Ralph. Alice: "Shall I get a cop to help keep the crowds back?" A couple of potential man and woman voters come by. Ralph reads his speech which goes:

"Friends, pretty soon it will be time to go to the polls and vote. You can vote for a guy like me, Ralph Kramden. A guy who has captured such ruthless gangsters such as Bullets Durgom or you can vote for my opponent, that no good BUM, Harvey Porter."

Gee, he just called his opponent a bum. That's so not going to help him get votes. The potential voters leave s Ralph promises honest government and more benches in the parks (though Jackie says: "parks in the benches. I wonder if that was a small blunder.) Ralph (to the man): "She won't be such a riot after you marry her." Gee, that's so not earning him brownie points. It's getting cold, so Ed tires to make hot smoke with some paper. But when more potential voters come by, Ralph coughs because of the smoke and calls Ed a moron and insults Trixie all in public. That's Ralph for you. Another potential voter comes by saying he's for Harvey Porter and says that Harvey has done a lot for the district such as building three new schools. Ralph says that in order for him to do that, he had to raise taxes. The man says: "I would like you to tell me how you are going to build schools without taxes?" Ralph says nothing. Ralph: "You will probably tell Harvey my plans." The guy leaves. Ralph later says to the gang that if he is asked a question that he doesn't know the answer too, he will give them a signal and they will start playing music as Ralph talks. Gee, that's a great idea not! Alice: "When you get elected and go to Albany Ralph, are you going to bring the drums and cymbals with you?" Can you just see Ralph as President, him being asked a question that he doesn't know the answer to and instructing his friends to make noises with their instruments while he talks? Oh boy! Another potential voter comes by asking Ralph a question that Ralph doesn't know. So the gang plays music while Ralph talks. The person can't hear Ralph due to the noise that the gang is making. After they have finished, the guy says: "When did you four nuts escape?" He leaves. Ralph instructs Ed to go down the street and play the drum, to lead the voters to Ralph. He and Trixie leave.

Mr. Morgan and Mr. Weaver come by just as Ralph reluctantly bangs Alice's cymbals. They call Ralph and idiot for doing what he's doing and they order him to read the speech they have made for him to read at the high school rally. They leave as Ralph thinks that maybe Alice is right for saying those two are crooks. Ed comes back with the drum busted over his head. He ran into Mr. Morgan and Mr. Weaver down the street. They must have introduced themselves to Ed and later assaulted him for helping Ralph. That was so not nice of them.

At the high school rally there's a big famous picture of Ralph in the background, Mr. Morgan introduces Ralph. As Ralph is coming through, the crowd is cheering him and there are signs praising him. As you watch Ralph coming through the crowd, I think you can assume it's the audience that is watching the Jackie Gleason Show live. It made sense for the producers to use that crowd instead of making one. Alice is also introduced. As Ralph is reading the speech that is a pack of lies, Alice leaves. Ralph regains his senses and yells at Mr. Morgan and Mr. Weaver to get off the stage. He praises Harvey and says that everyone should vote for him and Election time is a good time in America. Alice: "Now you are a hero." Ralph hugs and kisses Alice.

Credit I believe goes to the old Bill 'Mooners Archive, eBay.com, tv.com, Honeymooners Lost Episodes Book, tvguide.com, honeymooners.net, Honeymooners Box Set booklet Honeymooners Lost Episodes DVD booklet, Yahoo! Groups You’re A Riot! & amazon.com.
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