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Old 08-20-2018, 07:35 AM   #1
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Default Roseanne Quotes and Lines

Darlene: [to Roseanne] You have a big mouth.
Roseanne: No I don't.
[shouts from up the stairs]
Roseanne: Becky!
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Old 08-20-2018, 07:42 AM   #2
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Dan Conner: I put it away twenty years ago when we quit.
Roseanne Conner: We quit? I just thought we were out.
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Old 10-22-2018, 07:52 PM   #3
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Dan Conner: [to Darlene] Morning. Where is everybody?
Darlene Conner: Mom went to the supermarket and Jackie's still sleeping. The doctor gave her something to knock her out.
Dan Conner: What about D.J.?
Darlene Conner: I tried, but he wouldn't swallow the pill.

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Old 01-12-2019, 03:07 PM   #4
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Dan: (About a drywall job) Be a lot of money if I get it.
Roseanne: You're not gonna get it.
Dan: There'll be a lot of guys puttin' bids in.
Roseanne: And they're all better than you, I bet.
Dan: Hey, I'm pretty good.
Roseanne: You're not either.
Dan: I'm the best!
Roseanne: You're the worst!
Dan: I am drywall master of the universe! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!
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Old 05-07-2019, 11:00 PM   #5
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Roseanne: (to Barbara Healy)"It's people like you that give white trash a bad name."
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Old 05-08-2019, 06:00 AM   #6
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Dan: (About a drywall job) Be a lot of money if I get it.
Roseanne: You're not gonna get it.
Dan: There'll be a lot of guys puttin' bids in.
Roseanne: And they're all better than you, I bet.
Dan: Hey, I'm pretty good.
Roseanne: You're not either.
Dan: I'm the best!
Roseanne: You're the worst!
Dan: I am drywall master of the universe! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!
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Old 05-24-2019, 11:46 PM   #7
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Roseanne: "Wellll, middle class was fun."
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Old 06-29-2019, 12:54 PM   #8
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Roseanne: "There's nothin' like a hardship song to set my toes to tappin'."
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Old 06-29-2019, 02:43 PM   #9
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Becky: You did forget, I can't believe it!
Dan: [to Darlene] A little help. [Darlene imitates driving a car, crashing the car, and sirens blaring] Oh, yeah, your driving lesson.
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Old 07-04-2019, 04:20 PM   #10
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D.J. Conner:
[Darlene catches D.J. peeking at her] She called me a prevert.

Roseanne Conner:
No honey, you're not a prevert, you're a pervert.
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