The Limerick Game

[tiredmike59]

There once was a man named Lee
Who expected everything free
He never tipped
With that nickel he gripped
He was cheap as he could be.

[tiredmike59]

Two hunters were looking for game
They were not too good with their aim
They kept firing their guns
And when they were done
Both came out of the woods lame.

[tiredmike59]

A monkey was combing his hair
It seemed to be everywhere
But when he looked at his arse
It was kind of sparse
So he quickly sat down in a chair.

[tiredmike59]

A boy hauled his dogs in a wagon
In there,their tails were a waggin
They minded him well
And none of them fell
But the big one,his feet were a draggin.

[tiredmike59]

There once was a turtle named Mel
Who decided to upgrade his shell
Just for the heck
He added a deck
Making it look really swell.

[tiredmike59]

There once was a fellow named Jake
Whose tongue had turned into a snake
While taking a sip
The snake bit his lip
And the snake stuck out at his wake.

All I'm seeing is Huckleberry Hound, there has to be others that know a few.

[tiredmike59]

There once was a man named Dean
Whose teeth were a weird shade of green
When asked why this was
He told them, "Because "
" I ain't brushed since I was a teen "

[tiredmike59]

A man had been to the store
He noticed how prices have soared
They really wanted a lot
For the beef that he got
He's glad that he snuck out the door.

[tiredmike59]

A man heard noises one night
So he got up and turned on the light
He stood there in awe
At what he saw
A cockroach 6 feet in height.

[tiredmike59]

There once was a little kid named Randy
Who would stand on his head for some candy
His head grew flat
From doing that
So as an end table he came in quite handy.

[tiredmike59]

A man was chewing a plumb
He acted as if it were gum
He got into trouble
When he tried for a bubble
He choked on the pit,wasn't that dumb ?

[tiredmike59]

There was an old woman named Liddy
Who had become very mean and gritty
She started packing a gun
In case she met anyone
Who referred to her as an old biddy.

[tiredmike59]

There once was a boy named Ken
Who stunk up the class he was in
He farted all day
Teacher had nothing to say
But she did sing " Wayward Wind "

[tiredmike59]

Two students were caught cheatin
To the office they went for their beatin
" You know something,pard? "
" That test was real hard "
" But not as hard as that paddle we'll be meetin "

[tiredmike59]

There once was a man named Larry
His ears were extremely hairy
When he would go outside
The kids would all hide
They found him to be quite scary.