"Principle of The Thing":
(Ralph & Ed are about to redecorate the apartment.)
Alice: "If you ask me, this wall shouldn't be papered. It should be padded."
(She leaves.)
Ralph: "Ooh, just once. Bang!"
"Game Called On Account of Marriage":
Alice: "You are going to that wedding Ralph. You are going to the wedding. You are going to the wedding."
Ralph: "I am going to the ballgame."
Alice: "You are going to the wedding."
Ralph (yells): "I AM GOING TO THE BALLGAME."
Alice (yells): "YOU ARE GOING TO THE BALLGAME."
Ralph (yells): "I AM GOING TO THE WEDDING."
"Game Called On Account of Marriage":
Ralph: "I am going to the game."
(Ralph leaves.)
Alice: "You are not going to the game."
Ralph (opening the door): "I am going to the game."
(Ralph leaves.)
(Alice opens up the window.)
Alice (yells): "YOU ARE GOING TO MY SISTER'S WEDDING."
(Alice closes the window.)
(Ralph comes back up.)
Ralph (opening the door, yells): "I AM GOING TO THE GAME."
"Play It Again, Norton":
Ralph: "What did you used to call your dad?"
Ed: "Long distance."
"On Stage":
Ralph: "Well, I have to confess Mr. Faversham that I was in the 1927 follics of the bus drivers. As a matter of fact, I walked on stage and I didn't do anything and the audience was laughing."
Ed: "That ballet dress you had on didn't do you any harm."
"The Main Event":
Dynamite: "I need a manager. Someone who will give fights."
Ed: "Why don't you get the guy you KOed in 12 seconds?"
"On Stage":
Ralph: "That shows how much you know about show business. You're always talking about something you don't know anything about. Just remember this: Gregory Peck was an usher at the Music Hall, you know, when they found him, and Kurt Douglas was a soda jerk. So, there's a chance for me."
Alice: "Sure, you can become an usher at the Music Hall or a soda jerk!"
"Funny Money":
Ralph: "Do you know how embarrassing it is to be thrown out of the Raccoon Lodge?"
Alice: "Yeah, it's pretty embarrassing just being in it."
"Two For The Money":
Ralph: "How many holdups have I had?"
Alice: "Six."
Ralph: "In five of them, they didn't get anything."
Alice: "The sixth time was a doozy. They took $45 and the bus."
Ralph: "I have been driving a bus for 15 years and because I lose ONE bus, you have to hold it over my head."
|