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Old 11-26-2002, 08:49 PM   #106
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(Lori Beth & Chuck leave)
Richie: I guess we've both been played Fonz. Still freinds?
Fonz: You know it. (Richie & Fonzie hug)
Jerry: This all very touching. We've got another surprise.
Let's bring out Chachi & Joanie-Cunningham-Arcola!
Chachi: I don't like this Joanie. Why are we out here?
Don't tell me you've been cheating on me with Fonz too!
Joanie: Of course not!
Chachi: Thank God. I should have known you'd never be unfaithful to me to Joanie.
Jerry: She didn't say that..
Joanie: Hey!
Chachi: Oh, god. Why Joanie.
Joanie: Well, Chach, you went to Chicago. You didn't care how I felt. I was lonely. I needed someone.
Chachi: Who is he?
Joanie: It's not a he..
(Jenny Piccalo enters)
Jenny Piccalo: It's me!
Jerry: That's all the time we have see you next week!
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Old 11-26-2002, 08:52 PM   #107
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Hahahahahahahahahaha!!
That was sooo good!!

PS: LET IT SNOW!!! (ESPECIALLY IN CHAPPAQUA, NY)
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Old 11-26-2002, 11:12 PM   #108
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Quote:
Originally posted by FonzForever
Mrs C.: Oh sit on it Howard! What did you expect me to do?
LMAO!
So wait, what did Fonzie do, besides marrying LB? Richie said he forgave him..



Quote:
Chachi: Who is he?
Joanie: It's not a he..
(Jenny Piccalo enters)
Jenny Piccalo: It's me!
Jerry: That's all the time we have see you next week!
OMG!! LMAO!!!!! That was hilarious!!!!!!!!


Keep it up!
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Old 11-26-2002, 11:17 PM   #109
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IT WAS ALL HYSTERICAL!!
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Old 11-27-2002, 07:03 AM   #110
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Quote:
So wait, what did Fonzie do, besides marrying LB? Richie said he forgave him..

She was seeing Fonzie for some time. That why I had Richie say that Fonzie stole her from him. I guess Fonz will be getting an allument now, LOL. I should have added that somewhere.
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Old 11-29-2002, 01:54 PM   #111
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These posts are SOOO funny!


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Old 11-29-2002, 08:39 PM   #112
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I'm not sure if it's going anywhere, but I just got an idea:

*Joanie Cunningham walks out on stage*
Jerry-- Here, we have young Joanie Cunningham. She has some questions she wants answered. And though while we usually bring on guests who have confessions, this time we are bringing a guest who WANTS confessions......
Joanie-- Hi everyone!
Jerry- So, Joanie, which question are you going to ask first?
Joanie-- Well, I know my family has been arrested for locking my brother and his clone up and keeping them hidden in closets and attics, but what I want to know is why.
Jerry- Let's find out. Please bring out Joanie's parents, Howard and Marion Cunningham.
*Howard and Marion come out wearing orange jumpsuits, handcuffs, and shackles*
Jerry-- Howard, Marion, please have a seat.
Marion-- Oh Joanie, how ARE you? Are you eating well? You look a little pale.....
Joanie-- I'm okay, Mom.....Fonzie is taking REAL good care of me....
Howard-- Fonzie?
Joanie-- Yep, I'm staying with him in his apartment now.
Marion-- Joanie, you were supposed to stay with Mother, not Fonzie.....
Joanie-- That witch? Shucks, Mom, Fonzie is MUCH more fun.....
Jerry-- Joanie, just how much fun IS Fonzie......
Joanie-- Well, he's always got these magazines lying around. I've become so well educated, that Jenny is now coming to ME for advice. And the things I've learned from spying on him and his girlfriends! *giggles*
Howard-- Why that..!
Joanie-- But, recently, I've found a much deeper relationship with Fonzie
Marion-- Oh Joanie.....please don't say.....
Joanie-- That's right Mom! We've become an item!
Howard-- Joanie! You're only fourteen!
Marion-- How could you? That's illegal!
*Just then Fonzie walks out and the audience goes wild. Girls scream excitedly in the background just at the sight of the Fonz*
Fonz-- Aaaayyhhhhh......
*Fonzie sits in a chair and Joanie goes over and sits on his lap. Fonz holds her and smells her hair.*
Howard-- You #$%%%@#!
Marion-- Oh my.....*faints*
Jerry-- But, let's bring out another guest. This one comes all the way from the Cunningham's hallway closet.....
*Chuck #2 comes walking on stage*
Jerry-- Welcome, Chuck. Now I've heard that you have a confession to make, also.....
Chuck-- Well, you see, it's been lonely in that closet all these years, and well........*eyes up Joanie* You just don't know what it's like. Joanie has been the only girl I've seen. And she always smiles at me before she dumps her coat and galoshes on my head. None of the others did that! They just pretended I wasn't there!
Joanie-- Chuck?! I had no idea.....
Chuck-- There they are....those big, beautiful blue eyes that have peeping into that dark closet for years. You know, she once even tossed a bowl of spinach in on me. Imagine that! She cared enough to feed me!
Joanie-- *blushes* Well, actually, I just didn't want to eat the spinach.....and Mom said I couldn't leave the table until I ate all my dinner.....and I just couldn't wait to go see Lori Beth! *swoons*
Jerry-- Speaking of whom, Lori Beth and Richi Cunningham have been waiting backstage. They've been watching the entire thing on screen!
*Richie and LB walk on stage*
Richie-- (to Fonz) Buster, you'd better watch out! I'm going to tear you're head off and use it as a basketball!
Fonzie-- Whhoooaaaahhhhh......!
Fonzie-- Richie, think for a minute......who got you that date with Mrs. O' Malley, your tenth grade English teacher?
Richie-- *smiles* Oh yeeaahhhh, I remember that.....we ummm.....hhhhmmmm......alll night long......grins*
Fonzie-- But, you've got worse problems, Red. Your own brother is trying to make the moves on Shortcake......*he kisses Joanie*
Richie-- Chuck, how could you? She's our sister, for pete's sake!
Chuck-- It was just so lonely in that closet.....
Lori Beth (not being the brightest person, just gets Joanie's comment about sneking out to see her)-- Joanie!
Joanie-- Lori Beth, Richie could never love you like I could! One day he'll desert his entire family, including you, and run off to Greendland. Sure, he'll say he's in the army, but.......
Lori Beth-- Joanie......
Joanie-- He won't even make it to your own wedding.......and he'll lie and say that he's serving our country. But, he's just serving his own demented needs......
Richie-- What are you accusing me of?
Joanie-- Rich, we ALL know what you do in your spare time......
Richie-- Huh? What do I do?
Joanie-- I've heard the noises.....heck, they're loud enough to wake the entire neighborhood.......
Richie-- You have?
Joanie-- And the fact that Ralph Malph is always climbing a ladder and sneaking into your room.......well, didn't you think anyone would ever become suspicious?
Richie-- *blushes* Ummmmm.....where's the nearest exit?
Jerry-- Haha....I don't think you can escape THAT easily......
*Ralph Malph walks out carrying a basket of candy*
Richie-- Ralph! Run! They're on to us!
Ralph-- Richie, I can't......we have to confess. The guilt is killing me!
Richie-- But, Ralph.....
*Ralph passes out the candy to everyone on stage*
Jerry-- Mmmm.....this is really good!
Ralph-- That's right, folks. We've started our own candy making business!
Richie-- Ralpph! I asked you not to tell them!
Fonzie-- Ugghhhh....Iccckkk....Arggghhh.....what is IN this?
Ralph-- Well, we couldn't figure out how to get that creamy, brown texture....so......
Fonzie-- Malph! What did you put in this?!
Ralph-- Well, let's just say that the Cooper's cocker spaniel provided just the right ingredient........
*people start gagging and gasping for breath*
*Just then, the camera fades out*

OK.. That WAS stupid! EXTREMELY stupid, but it was fun.
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Old 11-29-2002, 08:52 PM   #113
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Old 11-29-2002, 09:26 PM   #114
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I can't believe I actually jumped on the bandwagon for this. I really doubt that I will post another of these. It can get kind of creepy seeing our beloved characters in such bizzarre and risque roles.
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Old 11-29-2002, 09:27 PM   #115
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join us! it's fun to corrupt characters, but you know we love them anyway!
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Old 11-30-2002, 09:10 PM   #116
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Got another one.
"This week on Jerry Springer.-The dark side of Milwaukee".
Jerry: It seems sthe perfect town. White picket fences, the aroma of fresh baked cookies. At first glance Milamukee, Wisconsin looks an ideal place to live. Or is it?
Jerry: Lets' bring out The Cunninghams!
(applause)
Jerry: Now Howard and Marion, why don't you tell us a little about your selfselves.
Howard: Well, I run a hardware store and we have two wonderful children..
Marion: Richie & Joanie. I'm so proud! They've both got families of their own now.
Jerry: What about your other son, Chuck?
Marion: I'm sorry, but you must be mistaken.
Jerry: I don;t think so.
Howard: Are you calling my wife a liar?
Jerry: No, He is...
(Enter Chuck Cunningham. The C's are shocked)
Chuck: That's right don;t say anything. Everyone thinks you too are sooo perfect.
Jerry: Care to explain this. Is this really your son?
Howard: Well, yes..
Marion: Oh Chuck, I'm so sorry. Have you been keeping warm..
Jerry: Care to explain this?
Marion: Well, it's just that, he was always dribbling his basketball in the house..
Howard: We warned him about that!
Jerry: You threw him out fo that?
Marion: No he moved out.
Howard; Then he tried to turn Richie against us! He convinced him to move out for a little while! Well, that was the last straw. He's nothing but a troublemaker!
Jerry: Let's bring out Richie and get his reaction.
(Richie enters)

Last edited by FonzForever : 11-30-2002 at 09:52 PM.
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Old 11-30-2002, 09:16 PM   #117
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hahahaha, continue please!
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Old 11-30-2002, 09:19 PM   #118
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Continued..
Jerry: How is seeing your brother again?
(Richie doesn't seem surprised)
Richie: Actually, Chuck contacted me a couple of years ago. We've been talking for a while.
Howard: No hold on a minute...
Richie: You hold on Dad! I can't believe what Chuck told me! I s it true?
Howard: (Sighs) Yes. I'm sorry Richie but it was for your own good.
Richie: My parents had me sent off to the army!
Jerry: Oh my God!
Marion: Now Richard. What were we to do? I mean you were wanting to drink soda with dinner... we had to get you in line somehow..
Richie: I'm soooo glad I'm moved to California!
Jerry: We've got another surprise. let's bring out K.C Cunningham!
K.C.: Well hi Jerry!

Last edited by FonzForever : 11-30-2002 at 09:54 PM.
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Old 11-30-2002, 09:28 PM   #119
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Tell us about your expereinces with your aunt and uncle.
K.C.: Well, it was great at first, it was like a dream come true.
Jerry: What happened?
K.C.: Well, everyone started to hear that Joanie, might be coming back. They were soooo happy. Joanie this, Joanie that.
Joanie! Joanie! Joanie!
Jerry: That's just terrible.
K.C.: Before I knew it, Jenny Piccaco was spreading rumors about me? I was devastated. I'm so pure you know. To think my own Aunt & Unlce instigated it, to get their "perfect" daughter back!
Jerry: Think that's something. Wait till you hear this, Let's bring out, Richie's best friend, Potsie Webber.
Jerry: Potsie, why don't you tell us about the abuse you suffered at the hands of your parents.
Potsie: Well, my father and I never really got along. For me a home cooked meal was the DOG's leftovers. He didn't know it but I overheard him talking to mom. He actually said he "that half-retard is YOUR son" (Potise cries)
continued...

Last edited by FonzForever : 11-30-2002 at 09:55 PM.
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Old 11-30-2002, 09:37 PM   #120
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Jerry: Let's bring out or next guest.. Ralph Malph. Ralph what's your story.
Ralph: My parents Mickey & Miinie Malph actually just diisaperered one day. Left home and nvere came back. Luckily my aunt and uncle stpped in and took care of me. I t wasn;t so bad at first. But when I told my uncle I was going to be a comedian, he enlisted me in the army, jus like Richie's father.
Potsie: My dad tried to enlist me in the army, but they wouldn't take me!
Jerry: This all just so hear wrenching. Let's bring out Flip Phillips.
Flip: You know Jerry it amamzing just because my freinds and I were out partying and hit a little girl, they decided to send me back to NJ! Can you beleive that?
(Audience boos Flip off the stage)
Lets bring out our final guest-Ashley Pfister!
Continued....
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