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Old 11-21-2002, 07:16 AM   #91
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Quote:
Originally posted by ¤MsConanOBrien¤
LMAO!!!! That was *SO* Funny, CollegeGirl! BRAVO!


I Agree!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 BRAVO!!!!!!!!
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Old 11-21-2002, 12:44 PM   #92
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Quote:
Originally posted by CollegeGirl


*LOL* Thanks! I meant to just write a couple lines as a reaction to the "milk catastrophe" but it grew and grew and grew.....*LOL*

I guess I just felt the need to clear Fonz's reputation. I think this was more his style.....

YAY!!!! That was great The Cunningham family is NOT really twisted! That was more Happy Days style! GREAT!
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Old 11-25-2002, 01:13 AM   #93
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I've laughed over this thread. I've screamed "NO WAY!" at this thread, I've tried to *keep* from laughing so I wouldn't have to explane to my parents...but I thought I'd finally imput.

Now...I have this real thing against writing same sex relainships in any kind...so every single one of these bizzare pairings will be perfictly straight...although a little off-the-wall.

Keep in mind that I don't watch Jerry Springer...never have, never will. So if this is a little off-beat...so be it.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jerry: Today's eposode is about Women who can't make up their minds which man they love! Let's hear it for Joanie Cunningham!
Audence: (Applause.)
Jerry:Alright Joanie, now...what men can't you decide who you love?
Joanie: Well...I really love my boyfriend...but somehow I havn't quite gotten over my childhood crush. Potsie Webber.
Jerry: Is that all?
Joanie: Yeah.
Jerry: Are you sure?
Joanie: (getting upset) Yeah.
Jerry: Allright...let's bring out...Joanie's mystery man!
Audence: (Applause)
(Fonzie walks in, carring a boquet of roses)
Joanie: Fonzie?
Fonzie: (Dosen't say a word, just walks over, gets on one knee, hands a shocked Joanie the roses and gently kisses her hand.)
Joanie: (Repeating herself) Fonzie?!?!
Fonzie: Yeah. Me. Shortcake. I don't know when I fell in love with you...I just know I did.
Joanie: (Sitting there, staring into the roses) I came here to tell Chachi how I felt about Potsie...not...Oh my... (bursts into tears)
Fonzie: (Gets up from position on the floor and wraps his arms around her. She cries on him.) There there, Shortcake. I'm here, I'm here.
Jerry: Well, before this gets too sappy, let's bring out...the boyfriend!
(Chachi walks out, Audence splits between chears and boos)
Chachi: Joanie? Fonzie? Uh-oh. (Realizing) Joanie brings me on Jerry Springer...she's sitting with Fonzie... (Getting Angry...) Fonzie! Are you and Joanie...(voice trails off)
Joanie: Chach, this isn't what it looks like...
Chachi: Oh yeah, I'm sure it's not. (To Fonzie) I'm surprised at you, Fonz. Stealing other people's girls was always below you. But Joanie? That's just wrong Fonz. What would Richie say?
Fonzie: I didn't steal her. I just told her the truth. Something I think you should do.
Chachi: What are you talking about?
Fonzie: (getting to his feet) You think I havn't seen it? The way you and Jenny look at eachother? Shouldn't you tell her about that...or are you just stupid enough to think that you'll get away with two-timeing on her?
Chachi: For starters Fonz...you've seen how Jenny looks at *me* I wouldn't ever cheat on Joanie! (glaring at Joanie) but it's odviously not mutial.
Fonzie: Look, I don't think there's a better time for the truth to come out then here and now...so go ahead...tell her. Tell her about you and Jenny.
Chachi: (Opens his mouth to speak, then changes his mind, snaps it shut, and throws a punch at Fonzie)
Fonzie: (Catches the punch) Ohhh, that was real stupid. (Throws his own punch towards Chachi's stomach, a punch Chachi barly dodges)
(Steve starts to walk towards the near-fight, when Joanie leaps to her feet)
Joanie: Stop it! Stop it both of you! You're acting like Children! And I think maybe I should just tell Potsie how I feel and run off with him.
Fonzie and Chachi in unison: Potsie?
Jerry: Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome Potsie Webber!
Audence: (Applause)
(Potsie enters through the same door, walks in, his face assuming it's trademark clueless position.)
Joanie: (Jumps to her feet and races across the room) Potsie!
Potsie: Hi Joanie
(Joanie throws her arms around him and kisses him.)
Potsie: (After recovering from the kiss) Joanie? What was that...
Joanie: Potsie, I've had a crush on you since I was little and it just started to resurface a few months ago, and I came to Jerry because I wanted to tell you and Chachi about it but then Fonzie showed up and declared that he loved me and...and...it just got all messed up!
Potsie: Hua?
Joanie: (Takes her arms from around him) Forget it! You're not the man I fell in love with.
Chachi: So who is it, blue eyes? Who are you in love with? Me or Fonzie?
Joanie: Oh God. Just when Potsie's out of the running...I've got another choice to make...
Jerry: Maybe not so much of a choice.
Chachi: (Goes pale)
Joanie: Chachi? Is what Fonzie said true? About you and Jenny?
Chachi: Well...uh...
Jerry: Roll film!
(Film on the corner plays. It shows the inside of Chachi's place, a slight tap on the door is heard and Jenny enters. "Is your mom..." she begins. Chachi shakes his head no and Jenny jumps into his arms. They begin kissing. The kiss intencifies...)
Jerry: I think that's enough
Joanie: (Tears in her eyes) Chach...
Chachi: Joanie, I'm sorry. You started teaching...and suddenly you wern't there. And well...Jenny was.
Joanie: Chachi, you were in your appartment! With Jenny! And I don't need to see the rest of the vidio to know what happened!
Chachi: I didn't want to go that far! I swear I didn't!
Jerry: Should we play more of the vidio?
Chachi: (Flushing) No.
Joanie: You know, there really is no choice. (To Fonzie) Fonzie, I never really thought of you in that way before. Give me a chance...and I might love you.
Fonzie: (Sits back on the couch) I love you, shortcake. (Leans in and gives her an intence kiss.
Joanie: (After breaking off from the kiss) Oh Fonz! (They begin to kiss agian.
Potsie: (Still confused) Wait...Joanie came to Jerry because she thought she was in love with me...then she realised she wasn't...but saw Chachi and Jenny together so she fell in love with Fonzie? What am I? A tool?
Jerry: An iddiot would be more approapate.
Chachi: Thanks alot Potsie.
Jerry: Next eposode, men who feel like women just used them to get to someone else.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sorry I wasn't funny. Humor isn't my talent. Drama is. It may not be verry Jerry-ish...but it was (hopefully) just messed up enough to fit in here. I know it wasn't a fanfic...but I'd love to know what some people thought...
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Old 11-25-2002, 01:20 AM   #94
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Hahhaa. That was good!!! LOl. Not as *risque*, but that whole Potsie thing LMAO!!!!!! A+!


Hey.. SolidChristian88 just gave me an idea! He did that video clips they do on Jerry every once in a while. That would make a really cool short Jerry episode! Hahahaha....
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Old 11-25-2002, 01:16 PM   #95
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Originally posted by ¤MsConanOBrien¤
Hahhaa. That was good!!! LOl. Not as *risque*, but that whole Potsie thing LMAO!!!!!! A+!


Hey.. SolidChristian88 just gave me an idea! He did that video clips they do on Jerry every once in a while. That would make a really cool short Jerry episode! Hahahaha....

That was good!
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Old 11-25-2002, 04:07 PM   #96
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I liked that!!!!
But, oh with that Joanie/Potsie thing, you had me hoping. I adore Joanie and Potsie!
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Old 11-26-2002, 07:26 PM   #97
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Ok, I've got one. I'm winging a bit since I haven't sen Springer in ages.
"Today on Jerry Springer: The Family Next Door-Exposed!"
Jerry: You think you know them. They're the seeminlgy innocent family that lives next door. Hardworking father, mom's the perfect homemaker, the kids have all grown up perfectly. But is everything as it appears?"
Let's welcome the Cunninghams, Howard & Marion!"
Jerry: Welcome, Howard & Marion. (Polite crowd applause).
A lot of people would say you have the perfect marriage.
Marion: I love my little guy!
Jerry: But does he love as much?
Howard: Now wait a minute! What are you trying to say Jerry?
Jerry: Let's bring out Fern Flagg!
(FF comes out to cheers)
Jerry: Fern has something she wants to tell you.
(Howard looks stunned)
Fern: Howard, I just wanted you to know I'm pregnant with your child!
Howard: That's crazy!
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Old 11-26-2002, 07:28 PM   #98
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Quote:
Originally posted by FonzForever
Ok, I've got one. I'm winging a bit since I haven't sen Springer in ages.
"Today on Jerry Springer: The Family Next Door-Exposed!"
Jerry: You think you know them. They're the seeminlgy innocent family that lives next door. Hardworking father, mom's the perfect homemaker, the kids have all grown up perfectly. But is everything as it appears?"
Let's welcome the Cunninghams, Howard & Marion!"
Jerry: Welcome, Howard & Marion. (Polite crowd applause).
A lot of people would say you have the perfect marriage.
Marion: I love my little guy!
Jerry: But does he love as much?
Howard: Now wait a minute! What are you trying to say Jerry?
Jerry: Let's bring out Fern Flagg!
(FF comes out to cheers)
Jerry: Fern has something she wants to tell you.
(Howard looks stunned)
Fern: Howard, I just wanted you to know I'm pregnant with your child!
Howard: That's crazy!

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Old 11-26-2002, 07:31 PM   #99
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Marion: How could you Howard! When did this happen?
Howard: Marion i...
Fran: I'll tell you when! When you ran off to your mother's!
I was just consling him. He deserves better than you!
Marion: You witch! (Marion charges Fern.. and they are broken up security)
Should I go on?
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Old 11-26-2002, 07:33 PM   #100
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YES!
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Old 11-26-2002, 07:34 PM   #101
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100 posts in this topic!
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Old 11-26-2002, 07:41 PM   #102
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Continued:
Fonzie jumps and stage and yells "Cool it!"
Everyone calms down.
Jerry: Who are you?
Fonz: I'm the Fonz! AAAAYYY!
(audience cheers)
Fonz: I can't believe it Mr. C.
Mr.c : I was going through a bad time. Marion and I were fighting, Joanie was in Chicage w/Chachi. My business was in trouble and I had no one to turn to. I went out bowling and Fren noticed I was upset. I know it was wrong but I couldn't help it. I needed someone and she was there for me.
(Mrs C. is in tears, Fonz goes over to to her);
Fonz: Now, Mrs. C. I know Mr C. messed up but he's human.
I know he loves you.
Mrs C. Oh Arthur, I don;t know what to think.
Jerry: Did you say Arthur?
Mrs C. Why yes.
Jerry: The same "Arthur" you've been secretly having an affair with!
(Audience ooohs and ahhs)

Last edited by FonzForever : 11-26-2002 at 08:00 PM.
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Old 11-26-2002, 07:57 PM   #103
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Continued:
Mr C.: Marion! You've got alot of explaining to do!
Mrs C.: Oh sit on it Howard! What did you expect me to do?
You're almost never home. Always bowling, at the lodge, at work or going off to some game! When you are home all you want to do is sit around and watch TV!
Fonz: Whooooaaaa...
(The C's both calm down).
Mr C. : Oh, you know Marion you're right. I'm sorry. I guess I never really though about how you felt. I guess if you really love Fonzie...
Mrs C.: Oh no Howard! I was just so hurt and confused.
I've behaved so awefully...
Mr C. We both have.
Fonzie: I guess I'll be going now.
Mr C. Wait Fonz. I don't blame you. If I could make a mistake, you can too.
Fonz: (hesitantly) I guess. Let me make it up to you Mr. C
(Fern is trying to leave) "Oh Fern",. Is there something you'd like to tell all of us?
(Fern is silent)
Fonz: "Now"
Fern"Oh allright! I'm not pregnant I just wanted Howard for myself. I see now that's not possible.
Fonz: I think you've learned your lesson. Why don't I take you to Arnold's for a bite?
Fern: That'd be nice.
Jerry: Well, it look like everything's cleared up here. Or is it?
To be continued?

Last edited by FonzForever : 11-26-2002 at 08:03 PM.
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Old 11-26-2002, 08:15 PM   #104
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Continue!!!
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Old 11-26-2002, 08:41 PM   #105
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Jerry: Let's bring out The Cunningham's son Richie & his wife Lori Beth!
(applause Fonz sees Richie and after a tense moment they hug).
Richie: I guess if my father can forgive you Fonz I can too.
Fonz: Thanks, Red.
Jerry: So you anf Fonzie are best friends, Richie?
Richie: "Yes. Fonzie always been there for me, from protecting me when I was a teenage to delivering my baby while I was in the army."
Jerry: That's interesting. Fonzie deliverd your baby.
Richie: Yeah, he was even my proxy over the phone so I could marry my wife while I was in Greenland.
LB: Fonzie's a great guy!
Jerry: Lori Beth, when are you going to tell Richie the truth?
LB: No please...
Jerry: Richie, you are Lori Beth arenlt married at all.
The minister over the phone was actually marrying Fonzie and Lori Beth!
Richie" WHAATT!
LB: "Oh Rich, I wanted to tell you, but I couldn't break your heart. You're such a nice guy.
Richie: You'd rather embarass me on national TV!
LB: It was just too much. Fonzie was there for me like no other man has ever been. He just makes me feel so good. He's so cool. I like you but.
Richie: Let me guess "I'm hum-drum".
LB: Wellll.. I'm sorry Richie, I really am.
Fonz: Me too. I never meant for this to happen.
Mr C. That's the SECOND time you'eve said that today Fonz?
Fonz: What am I supposed to do? I'm a good guy. But chicks dig me. Richie this isn;t so bad.
Richie: Are you kidding me Fonz? My best friend steals my wiffe who I wasn't even married to? No so bad!
Fonz: Rich, I own a garage, and half of Arnold's. I'll be a great provider. I know it's been tough for you pursueing your dream...
(Fonz outs his arm around Richie)
Richie "Pursuing my dream".
Fonz: In California. You wonlt have to worry about providing for a family.
Richie: What about my son?
Lori Beth: Well, he's not really ours.
Richie: But the hair he can't be Fonzie's.
Lori Beth: He's not Fonzie's either.
Rich & Fonz: Then who's the father?
(Chuck Cunningham enters the stage)
Chuck: You guys thought you were so smart! You were always jealous of me. You though you got rid of me.
Lori Beth: I love you Chuck.
Chuck: I love you too LB. Let's go!
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