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|01-15-2009, 09:48 AM||#1|
Join Date: Jul 03, 2004
Actual Quotes from Federal employees' performance
"Since my last report, he has reached rock bottom and
has started to dig."
"His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of
"Works well when under constant supervision and when
cornered like a rat in a trap."
"This young lady has delusions of adequacy."
"She sets low personal standards and then consistently
fails to achieve them."
"This employee should go far - and the sooner he starts,
"This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an
Actual Quotes from military Officer Efficiency Reports
"Not the sharpest knife in the drawer."
"Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold
it all together."
"A gross ignoramus -- 144 times worse than an ordinary
"A photographic memory, but with the lens cover glued
"A prime candidate for natural de-selection."
"One-celled organisms outscore him in IQ tests."
"Fell out of the family tree."
"Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train
"Has two brains; one is lost and the other is out
looking for it."
"He's so dense, light bends around him."
"If you gave him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get
"If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the
"It's hard to believe that he beat out 1,000,000 other
"Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only
"Wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead."
|01-15-2009, 05:50 PM||#3|
I got a rock.
Join Date: May 17, 2002
Location: The Great White North
Very, very funny!!!!!!
Only a life lived for others is worth living. Alfred Einstein
A life isn't worth living unless it has impact on other lives. Jackie Robinson
Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better man. Benjamin Franklin
|01-15-2009, 08:13 PM||#4|
God Bless Val
Join Date: May 29, 2006
Location: Bewitched in Ohio
I think I've worked with some of those people.
"Jesus loves you and He approves this message."
"I'm alive. I'm feeling good. I'm trying to live every moment as much as I can." - Valerie Harper, March 2013
|01-15-2009, 08:50 PM||#5|
MAN VS SAMMICH.
Join Date: Mar 23, 2005
Whether I'm the rose of sheer perfection
A freckle on the nose of life's complexion
The Cinderella or the shine apple of its eye
I gotta fly once, I gotta try once,
Only can die once, right, sir?
Ooh, life is juicy, juicy and you see,
I gotta have my bite, sir.
Get ready for me love, 'cause I'm a "comer"
I simply gotta march, my heart's a drummer
Don't bring around the cloud to rain on my parade
|01-15-2009, 10:40 PM||#7|
Join Date: Apr 07, 2006
"The true meaning of America, you ask? It's in a Texas rodeo, in a policeman's badge, in the sound of laughing children, in a political rally, in a newspaper...In all these things and many more, you'll find freedom. And freedom is what America means to the world. And to me."
--Audie Leon Murphy
June 20, 1924--
May 28, 1971
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