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Old 01-02-2009, 12:12 AM   #1
Janice
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Question Would it bother you if you gave someone a gift - and they gave it away?

I know once you give a person a gift, it's theirs to do with as they please. Still, there have been a few occasions when I've had my feelings hurt. I used to make Christmas baskets, as centerpieces. I'd buy the basket and fillings at a crafts store. They were simply beautiful. People used to tell me to go into business and sell them.

I sent one to a friend for Christmas. She was an internet friend. We were very close for almost three years. We even talked of visiting each other. Anyway, she went wild over the basket. She told me that she visited her parents, who don't live nearby her, and that she gave it to her mother. She even joked that she gave it to her as a gift, so her mother thought she bought it for her.

I guess I should have been flattered, but I remember feeling hurt, or at the very least, wishing that she didn't tell me.
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Old 01-02-2009, 12:43 AM   #2
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I think my feelings would be hurt, especially if I put a special thought into it. I can totally understand you being a little insulted by the basket regifting Janice.
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Old 01-02-2009, 12:55 AM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Brian Damage
I think my feelings would be hurt, especially if I put a special thought into it. I can totally understand you being a little insulted by the basket regifting Janice.
The thing is, I was making the baskets for my family and friends. I e-mailed her pictures, and she loved them. The baskets cost $50+ to make, and I went to Mailbox Etc, to send it to her in Michigan, and that cost me $30. She was so cavalier when she told me too, like it was the thing to do. If I was friendly with her mother, I guess I wouldn't have minded as much.
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Old 01-02-2009, 02:16 AM   #4
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I can certainly understand why you would feel hurt by that. To be honest, my family regifts things all the time. But we never actually tell that to the person who originally gave them to us. That's just tacky.
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Old 01-02-2009, 05:23 AM   #5
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yes, it would bother me.
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Old 01-02-2009, 10:37 AM   #6
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I think it probably won't bother me if I know that person who got the gift but I don't think I would like it if they did that to someone I don't know.

Maybe you should send your friend a bill and say, you are paying for this gift you gave to your mother.
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Old 01-02-2009, 10:44 AM   #7
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It would bother me also.
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Old 01-02-2009, 12:52 PM   #8
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I would feel hurt, too. After all, you spend all this time picking out their gift and then they just give it to someone else.

It's just rude, really.
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Old 01-02-2009, 12:58 PM   #9
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Wow, this is cool. I thought some would disagree and tell me that it was her gift to do as she pleased and that I had no right to feel that way.

Does anybody else have any stories where a person gave away a gift they gave to someone?
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Old 01-02-2009, 01:38 PM   #10
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Sadly, my parents are the King and Queen of regifting. My wife and I bought them a dvd player and they gave it to my brother.
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Old 01-02-2009, 01:56 PM   #11
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I wanted to get some opinions about this:
Maybe it's just me, but I think it depends on what the gift is. If it's something useful or something the person obviously put a lot of time and effort into(like a DVD player or gift basket), I think it's rude to just give it away. But if it's something that I'd never use, should I really just let it sit around forever and take up space? Wouldn't it be better to give it to someone who would actually appreciate it and use it? I can honestly see why regifting might hurt someone's feelings, but I really do think it's acceptable in certain situations. If someone gives the gift away, that doesn't necessarily mean that they don't appreciate the thought behind it. Or at least that's what I was always taught. Am I just weird?
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Old 01-02-2009, 01:59 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Brian Damage
Sadly, my parents are the King and Queen of regifting. My wife and I bought them a dvd player and they gave it to my brother.
Ouch. The best way to deal with them is go give them gifts that are exclusive to them. For you mother, a gift certificate to her beauty salon. For your dad, a gift certificate for whatever he likes, Home Depot, etc. Then to add a personal touch, give them their favorite perfume and cologne, with a nice Hallmark calendar. That'll fix 'em.
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Old 01-02-2009, 01:59 PM   #13
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Yes, you have every right to feel upset. If you put thought into it and thought they'd like it, of course it's going to hurt if they give it away. I know I'd be hurt.
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Old 01-02-2009, 02:02 PM   #14
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Just to clarify, I think you have every right to feel upset, Janice.

I'm just saying that I can see the other side of the coin as well.
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Old 01-02-2009, 02:07 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sara Micelli
Just to clarify, I think you have every right to feel upset, Janice.

I'm just saying that I can see the other side of the coin as well.
I agree with you too, though. Yeah, it'd hurt me...but if they're not going to use it they might as well, really.
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