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Old 12-26-2008, 04:43 PM   #1
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Default Advice on how to help a friend

One of my close friends recently had brain surgery to remove a tumor. I have known her for five years and we became close friends during my freshman year of college. She is a year older than me. We sort of lost touch when she moved out of state to attend law school. A couple of months ago she started having painful headaches but thought it was stress from school and her job so she sort of ignored them. A couple of weeks ago she passed out and was taken to the hospital. They found out she had a tumor in her brain. She was flown back here to her hometown to have surgery done. The surgery was done on Monday and she was kept heavily sedated for three days. I didn't find out about her until Wednesday when her dad called me. Most of her friends from college have moved out of state and I'm the only one left here. The tumor is beginin but the surgery affected her speech and her left side is weak. I saw her earlier today. Her head is completely shaved and part of skull has been temporarily removed. She was extremly happy to see me her speech is very hard to understand. But she is heading into depression because of her weakned state and she doesn't know if she can ever return to law school. I'm really not sure how to help her or what I can do for her. Have any of you been in a similar situation or have any ideas about helping her. I'm thinking about buying her a wig because she told me she feels ugly and I think buying wig would save her family some money.
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Old 12-26-2008, 05:26 PM   #2
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Originally Posted by browneyes106
One of my close friends recently had brain surgery to remove a tumor. I have known her for five years and we became close friends during my freshman year of college. She is a year older than me. We sort of lost touch when she moved out of state to attend law school. A couple of months ago she started having painful headaches but thought it was stress from school and her job so she sort of ignored them. A couple of weeks ago she passed out and was taken to the hospital. They found out she had a tumor in her brain. She was flown back here to her hometown to have surgery done. The surgery was done on Monday and she was kept heavily sedated for three days. I didn't find out about her until Wednesday when her dad called me. Most of her friends from college have moved out of state and I'm the only one left here. The tumor is beginin but the surgery affected her speech and her left side is weak. I saw her earlier today. Her head is completely shaved and part of skull has been temporarily removed. She was extremly happy to see me her speech is very hard to understand. But she is heading into depression because of her weakned state and she doesn't know if she can ever return to law school. I'm really not sure how to help her or what I can do for her. Have any of you been in a similar situation or have any ideas about helping her. I'm thinking about buying her a wig because she told me she feels ugly and I think buying wig would save her family some money.
Hold off on buying the wig and see what other posters say about that. I think you should ask her first though.

I think they will say the same thing I will say.

Just be there for her and talk to her. I don't know what else to suggest other than that.

Just be there for her
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Old 12-26-2008, 07:33 PM   #3
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I have talked to her about the wig and she is happy about it.
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Old 12-26-2008, 08:04 PM   #4
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I have talked to her about the wig and she is happy about it.
Well, as long as she is happy about it, go for it.
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Old 12-27-2008, 01:05 AM   #5
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You should be there for her and give her strength and encouragement to continue. She may feel depressed now (this is understandable) but please let her know that there are hundreds of others (at least one here in Chicago that was well publicized about a year ago) who have gone through the same thing and came through. It will take a lot of work, faith and love on EVERYONE'S part, but she can and WILL make it through this! Instill that in her, remind her of it from time to time, and she will be fine.
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Old 12-27-2008, 09:13 PM   #6
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You should be there for her and give her strength and encouragement to continue. She may feel depressed now (this is understandable) but please let her know that there are hundreds of others (at least one here in Chicago that was well publicized about a year ago) who have gone through the same thing and came through. It will take a lot of work, faith and love on EVERYONE'S part, but she can and WILL make it through this! Instill that in her, remind her of it from time to time, and she will be fine.
Her family and doctors have told her about other people in her condition.I think she worried mostly because her law school career has been interrupted. Techincally she one has her 1st year finished and was she attending school out of state. Right now her family is looking to seeing if he could transfer to the law school here which it would be sort of cool because I will start next fall and I would see her around campus.
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