Favorite lines/quotes

[CAJeannieFan57]

What are some of your favorite quotes or lines from TBNS? No episode name is necessary - just the quote or line -

Here's one to start:

Howard says, "Do you think I should be buried, or cremated?"

Emily's reply, "Howard, I always thought you should be bronzed."

[catlover79]

^ Actually, Bob was the one who said Howard should be bronzed.

How about Bob's trip to the ice cream parlor, when John Ritter sings to him: Single scooper, single scooper, this man is a party pooper!

The Peeper: I love working with kids. The way I figure it, Bob, the kids of today are the adults of tomorrow.

Bob: Chicago before dawn. My kind of town. It may be a sleeping giant now, but soon it will awaken to become the crossroads of America.
Emily: Can it, Bob.

Jerry: (selling Thanksgiving raffle tickets) Hey, Elaine, how about taking a chance on a turkey?
Elaine: No thanks, Jerry, I don't want to go out with you!

Jerry: Gimme a W!
Bob: W.
Jerry: Gimme an M!
Bob: M.
Jerry: What do you got?
Bob: Wm.

Bob: Larry, what are you doing here?
Larry: I just came by on my lunch hour to help out Big Red.
Mrs. Bakerman: Who’s Big Red?
Larry: Oh, that’s what I call Carol. She has red hair.
Mrs. Bakerman: Isn’t that nice? My brother, Carlisle, used to call his wife Big Red. Of course, she was a Communist.

I also love Howard & Jerry's argument over who gets to put the angel on the top of the tree in the fourth season Christmas episode. Howard says, "the one year I didn't, the Korean War broke out!"

And finally, who can forget "Norman Borden, the Mormon Doorman"?

[Kristen]

The "WM" quote is classic. Actually, that whole ep. is hilarious. I also like this, from the ep. w/ Ruth Corley:

Carol:Sister So-and-so [can't recall the name right now] called. She wants to know if you'll go 50/50 on a hitman.



And when Bob is talking about how one of his old girlfriends could've been a great artist, but she took the easy way out and "became a....school," instead of schoolteacher, b/c he knew Emily would kill him.

[catlover79]

Originally Posted by Kristen

The "WM" quote is classic. Actually, that whole ep. is hilarious. I also like this, from the ep. w/ Ruth Corley:

Carol:Sister So-and-so [can't recall the name right now] called. She wants to know if you'll go 50/50 on a hitman.



And when Bob is talking about how one of his old girlfriends could've been a great artist, but she took the easy way out and "became a....school," instead of schoolteacher, b/c he knew Emily would kill him.

Sister Mary Catherine wanted to go 50/50 on a hitman. Hilarious!!

[sew091472]

Congressman Avery: I hope you remember that (voting) when you close the curtains on Tuesday November 4th.

Howard: Well, I can't close my curtains. My plants will die.

[catlover79]

Remember Mrs. Loomis, Bob's former patient who was also the candy striper when he was in the hospital getting his tonsils out on Christmas Eve? Bob was all grumpy and she said, "Merry Christmas, Mr. Scrooge!!!" The line itself really isn't funny but her delivery is priceless.

[Ohio8]

Emily: "Bob, I think I'll make you some coffeee." Bob: "I love coffee." Jerry: "I love tea." Carlin: "I love the java jive and it loves me."

Emily: "Bob, if you're going to write an anonymous note, don't use personalized stationery." Bob: "I wasn't going to sign it."

Mr. Peterson: "You helped us all in every way." Mr. Carlin: "You got inside our head." Michelle: "And that is why we 'd like to say -- "Carol (enters in a hurry): "Mr. Gianelli's dead." Mrs. Bakerman: "Well that rhymes."

[CAJeannieFan57]

"I am strong"

"I am invincible"

Jerry: "You are woman."

I forget who said the first line or two, but it was Jerry that finished it. Of course, this was a phrase from a song of the 70s....Helen Reddy's "I Am Woman (Here Me Roar)"

[Scoobiedoo30]

I am strong

[catlover79]

Howard: Is there a trick to stringing cranberry sauce?

I also loved the Jerry Robinson Trio's rendition of "Good King Wenceslas" at the Christmas office party in Season 2. The trio consisted of Jerry, Dr. Tupperman and Dr. Tetzi. Dr. Tetzi was played by Gene Blakely, who also played Darrin's drinking buddy Dave in several episodes of Bewitched.

[CAJeannieFan57]

Howard: Can I watch your television?

Emily: Is yours broken?

Howard: No, but my fridge is. I don't like watching television without something to eat.

[catlover79]

This isn't a quote, but Howard's card trick (throwing the deck against the wall) was too hilarious. I don't know how Bob Newhart and Suzanne Pleshette got through that scene without dissolving into laughter - they kept perfectly straight faces!!

[catlover79]

Originally Posted by sew091472

Congressman Avery: I hope you remember that (voting) when you close the curtains on Tuesday November 4th.

Howard: Well, I can't close my curtains. My plants will die.

[Indy788]

I was just watching Mr. Emily Hartley and this scene was always one of my favorites:

Bob: Ever since I found out what our IQs are..well I think it's effecting our marriage.
Emily: What do you mean by that?
Bob: Marriage is a wedding between..
Emily: Oh Bob I know what marriage means, but what's it got to do with us, we've got a perfect marriage.
Bob: Emily, a perfect marriage is when the husband and the wife have the same IQ.
Emily: Bob, it is not important.
Bob: Next to perfect is where the husband's is higher than the wife's.
Emily: Bob! Forget it!
Bob: Third, is where the wife is 1 point higher than the husband's.
Emily: Please, Bob!
Bob: And, the fourth, which is us, which is the worst, is where the wife is 151 and the husband is 129 which is a difference of uh....uh..
Emily: Twenty-Two

[catlover79]

^ That's hilarious...and that certain episode has commentary on the DVD by Bob Newhart, Marcia Wallace and co-creator David Davis. Bob mentioned that that was one scene executed just perfectly.