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Old 06-08-2018, 07:49 AM   #1
Frank Gannucci
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Default Honeymooners Episode Reviews: "The Big Sell Revue" & "Two Below":

Honeymooners Episode Reviews: "The Big Sell Revue" & "Two Below" (aka "Retreat To The Basement"):

Credit I think goes to (the original) Bill's 'Mooners Archives, eBay.com, tv.com, Honeymooners Lost Episodes Book, tvguide.com, honeymooners.net, Honeymooners Box Set booklet Honeymooners Lost Episodes DVD booklet, Wikipedia.org, Yahoo Group You're A Riot! & Amazon.com.

Episode #168
VHS & DVD: Never been released.
Air Date: 10/9/60

"The Big Sell Revue":

Surprise. I was able to get a hold of this rare sketch.

For a long time, NOBODY knew that this sketch existed. It started to appear in 2010s. This whole sketch is similar to the beginning of “Ralph Kramden Inc.” and a bit similar to “Better Living Through TV.” As Jackie once said: “And Away We Go.”

Jack Lescoulie introduces us to the two “greatest salesmen of all time.” We cut to a park bench where Ralph & Ed sit down. Ralph says he has a reason that he wanted to meet Ed in the park. Ed looks and sees a yellow-bellied sapsucker. Ralph doesn’t see one. Ralph: “That is a squirrel and look out because they like nuts.” Ed takes his time in typical Ed fashion to start eating his lunch which gets Ralph upset.

Ralph shows Ed an object. Ed: “That is the greatest thing that I have ever seen. What is it?” Ralph: “It’s everything.” Ralph: “This can open cans, spread cheese, scale fish, tweeze eyebrows, core apples, a mustache trimmer, a toenail clipper and a wart remover.” Like I said, this is almost like the time in “Better Living Through TV” where Ralph showed Ed the Happy Housewife Helper. By looking at both gadgets, it doesn’t seem like they can do all the things that Ralph said. Ralph: “Isn’t this a great Christmas gift?” Ed: “Yeah, for a man with a long mustache, long toenails and warts.” Ralph: “That is what I like about you Ed. You get the picture immediately.” Ralph said that he can buy the patent for this invention for $200. Ralph: “The inventor has a sick mom in Europe and has to leave the country immediately.” Predictably, Ralph asks Ed for some money so Ralph can buy the patent. Ed tries to think by closing his eyes and moving his finger. This gets Ralph upset. Ed continues to think. Ed: “6 of 1. Have a dozen of the other.” Ed says that he has $12.18.”

Ralph: “Isn’t there somewhere else you can get the money? How about your pals in the sewer?” Ed: “Maybe I can FLOAT a loan. Maybe I can DIP into the SLUSH Fund.” Ralph says that he is about to punch Ed. Ralph said that this can make them rich. With a lot of dough, that can show that Alice & Trixie. Ralph: “I’m sick and tired of hearing Alice call me stupid. “ Ed: “Now is your chance to prove it.” Ralph suggests Ed get money from Ed’s rich uncle in Bayonne. Ed said that his (Ed’s) uncle is broke. He said that he lost it in the crash. The crash: A truck backed into his Bush Bar. Stuff was everywhere and people were slipping. Ralph: “I don’t know why I get mixed up with you. It probably is because I am sentimental.” What a thing to say to your friend. Ralph says that he could put this on the market himself and make millions. All he has to do is go to a bank or his relatives. But, because he is sentimental, he is thinking of both him and Ed claims Ralph. Ralph: “I figured that if you are the friend of a friend; give him a helping hand on the ladder of success.”

Ed blows his nose out of sadness. Ed: “You are so lovable. If I let you down right now, I would be a rat.” Ed loans him the money…from his shoe. Ralph says that if he said anything up to now that hurt his feelings that he doesn’t hold a grudge. Ralph gives Ed his pomegranate. Ed is happy. Ralph claims that he and Ed are on their way to being rich. They will move out and get a new circle of friends like motion picture stars. Yeah sure. We all know that isn’t true. Ed tells Ralph to hold the phone. After thinking about it, Ed has come to this conclusion. He wants to go along with Ralph and be a millionaire. But, he won’t forget his friends. He doesn’t want to change. He wants to remain the same old lovable Ed Norton. There is one important thing that he knows about the word “success.” After many diligent hard years working on his trade in the sewer. The important thing is: “You meet the same people on the way up as you do on the way down.” This line was mentioned in “On Stage.” Only thing is that in that episode, Ralph said it and Ed responded by saying the same thing along with: “Happens to me every day in the sewer.” They leave.

Jackie Gleason comes on stage and says goodnight.

Johnny Olsen does the sponsor plug which is the Speidel watch that is so flexible that you can tie it in a knot. After the credit roll, a still (with then actor Ronald Reagan) appears and the CBS announcer says that the General Electric Theater will return to its normal time slot "next week" and than a still for Jack Benny's old show appears and the announcer says that Jack's show will return "next week." Than another still comes on that says that the program was pre-recorded even though Jackie says that this show was being done live.

Episode #169
VHS & DVD: Attached to a bunch of other skits as well as more.
Air Date: 9/29/62

"Two Below" (aka Retreat To The Basement"):

At the Kramden apartment, Trixie (played by Patrica Wilson) comes in. They talk about their upcoming trip to Atlantic City. Trixie bought some clothes which include a hat that when they wear them, they look like they have buckets on their heads. Alice (played by Sue Ann Langdon) bought the same hat. Alice shows Trixie Ralph's large bathing suit. She was letting them out. Ed comes in. He had a normal day in the sewer. He talks about his day. Ralph comes home. He has some news. They are not going to Atlantic City; they are spending a week in the cellar as part of them doing civil responsibility. Ha! The girls don't like it. Ralph talks about an air-raid shelter. He reads them how important it is to test themselves to emergencies in which it is required for them to spend one week in the cellar with the barest essentials. Alice: "One week? We have been doing this for 14 years." Ralph: "We are going down to the cellar." Alice: "What about Atlantic City?" Ralph talks about what would happen if the pilgrims invaded Atlantic City instead of Plymouth Rock. Ralph: "What would happen then?" Ed: "We would be eating turkey with saltwater taffy." The girls say they are going to Atlantic City and go upstairs. Ed asks Ralph if it is all right if he went to Atlantic City with the girls. Ralph: "Go ahead. Why should I be mad? It would be like Caesar being stabbed by Romeo." Ralph (yells): "WHO IS THE BEST FRIEND YOU EVER HAD? I AM." He is? Ralph (yells): "WHO SHOWED YOU WERE THE UNEMPLOYMENT OFFICE WAS? I DID. WHO GAVE YOU THE SEWER JOB? I DID." Ralph talks about the best things that he ever did to Norton. Ralph: "I will allow you to go to Atlantic City." Ed: "I will send you a postcard." Ralph (yells): "YOU ARE COMING WITH ME." Gee, what a friend...NOT! The scene closes with a star shrinking the video.

In the cellar, Ralph sets things up. The cellar looks to be different then it was in "Dial J For Janitor." Ralph is wearing an outfit that looks like he is ready for civil defense. Ed comes in with his usual clothes as well as a cap, a canteen and pretty much nothing else and scares Ralph. Ed says the reason why he is wearing what he is because he didn't know what to wear. Ed: "Even Abercrombie & Fitch didn't know what to wear for a week down in the cellar." Ed: "This is a cozy cold bin." Ed unpacks. He takes out a book. Ralph reads the fact that the book was from the Bensonhurst Public Library and has been in Ed's hands since '36. Ralph locks the door. Ed shows some cans of food that have the labels taken off. Ed said that he took them off just in case the cellar gets flooded and if the labels were still on, the labels were going to be washed off anyway. Ralph asks how they are going to tell which food can from which. Ed: "What do you think I am, stupid? I got the labels right here." Ralph tries to kick Ed out but Ed said that Ralph threw the key out. Ed & Ralph use the bunk beds that I guess Ralph made or took down to go to sleep. Ralph: "Don't step on my face." Ed: "I wouldn't dirty my shoe on your face." Ed says that he misses his Indian blanket. Ed says that he can't sleep. Neither can Ralph. Ralph suggests them reading a book and taking turns. Ed goes first. Ed (reading): "'Ivanhoe by Sir Waterscott. Published in London, England. Portions of this book may not..." Ralph (yells): "WILL YOU READ THE BOOK?" Ed reads the book and when he gets to the end of the first sentence, he says "period." He continues to read and says: "the war of the rosses." Ralph (yells): "THE WAR OF THE ROSES." Ha! Ralph snores. Ed wakes him up by yelling "RALPH." Ralph (yells): "WHAT DO YOU WANT?" Ed (yells): "IT'S YOUR TURN TO READ!" Ralph (yells): "WILL YOU GO TO SLEEP?" Ralph tries to go to sleep, so does Ed. Ed can't go to sleep with the bright light that is hanging in front of him. He can't reach it. So he gets an ax. Not only does he not hit the light, he accidentally hits the water pipes, which causes Ralph and to some extent, himself to get wet. Ralph is completely soaked in water and somehow another pipe leaks what I think is oil as the "episode" ends.

During the curtain call, Jackie is still wet when he says "Goodnight!" During the credit roll, Johnny says Trixie was played by Patricia Wilson. According to the Goodtimes Home video VHS which I have, it says that Shelia MacRae played a part in this show which is not true. Johnny Olsen says: "This program was pre-recorded."

At the end of the curtain call, there is a still with the CBS Eye logo. In the middle it says: "This program was pre-recorded." That message, for whatever reason, is hard to read. After this is shown, a person (I think it was Johnny) says: "Thank you Jackie."
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