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Old 09-06-2018, 10:58 AM   #886
Steve M.
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BARBER: How would you like your hair cut?
CUSTOMER: Off.
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ON THE CHARGE OF IMPERSONATING AN OFFICE!!
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Old 09-06-2018, 11:01 AM   #887
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Q: When would you hit a birthday cake with a hammer?
A: When itís a pound cake.
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I love all three boys from Home Improvement.

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Old 09-06-2018, 10:10 PM   #888
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Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great fall?
To make up for his miserable summer.
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Old 09-07-2018, 05:48 AM   #889
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Q: Why is Peter Pan always flying?
A: He neverlands
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Old 09-07-2018, 07:11 PM   #890
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Q: What do you give to a pumpkin who is trying to quit smoking?
A: A pumpkin patch!
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Old 09-07-2018, 09:02 PM   #891
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This is SO bad!
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Old 09-07-2018, 11:03 PM   #892
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Old 09-07-2018, 11:10 PM   #893
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A Grandparent's Ipod

1.“I Can’t See Clearly Now” by Johnny Nash “
2.“You’re So Varicose Vein” by Carly Simon
3.“Talking’ Bout My Medication” by the Who “
4.“Once, Twice, Three Trips to the Bathroom” by the Commodores
5.“How Can You Mend A Broken Hip?” by the Bee Gees
6.“These Boots Give Me Arthritis” by Nancy Sinatra
7.“I Get By with a Little Help from Depends” by the Beatles
8.“Bald Thing” by the Troggs
9.“You Can’t Always Pee When You Want” by the Rolling Stones
10.“I Heard It through the Grape Nuts” by Marvin Gaye
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Old 09-07-2018, 11:47 PM   #894
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Daffynition - cockfight: fowl play.
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Old 09-07-2018, 11:49 PM   #895
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Daffynition - nasal spray salesman: one who sticks his business in people's noses.
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Old 09-08-2018, 05:36 AM   #896
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Knock Knock!
Who's There?
Arthur
Arthur who?
Arthur more cookies in the jar?
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Old 09-08-2018, 03:02 PM   #897
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A couple goes to an art gallery. They find a picture of a naked women with only her privates covered with leaves.
The wife doesn't like it and moves on but the huband keeps looking.
The wife asks: "What are you waiting for?"
The husband replies: "Autumn."
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Old 09-08-2018, 03:14 PM   #898
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How do trees go online?

They log-on of course.
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