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Old 09-06-2018, 09:58 AM   #886
Steve M.
Holding the compass
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BARBER: How would you like your hair cut?
CUSTOMER: Off.
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My blogs:

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Pictures of Beautiful Women

WANTED DEAD OR ALIVE:

REPUBLICAN GOVERNORS SCOTT WALKER - RICK SNYDER - JOHN KASICH - RICK SCOTT - PAUL LePAGE

ON THE CHARGE OF IMPERSONATING AN OFFICE!!
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Old 09-06-2018, 10:01 AM   #887
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Q: When would you hit a birthday cake with a hammer?
A: When itís a pound cake.
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I love all three boys from Home Improvement.

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"Ciao, baby!" - John Larroquette as Dan Fielding

Goodnight, sweet prince. Harry Anderson 1952-2018

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Comcast/XFINITY, please bring UP TV back. Thank you.
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Old 09-06-2018, 09:10 PM   #888
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Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great fall?
To make up for his miserable summer.
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Old 09-07-2018, 04:48 AM   #889
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Q: Why is Peter Pan always flying?
A: He neverlands
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Old 09-07-2018, 06:11 PM   #890
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Q: What do you give to a pumpkin who is trying to quit smoking?
A: A pumpkin patch!
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Old 09-07-2018, 08:02 PM   #891
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This is SO bad!
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Old 09-07-2018, 10:03 PM   #892
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Old 09-07-2018, 10:10 PM   #893
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A Grandparent's Ipod

1.“I Can’t See Clearly Now” by Johnny Nash “
2.“You’re So Varicose Vein” by Carly Simon
3.“Talking’ Bout My Medication” by the Who “
4.“Once, Twice, Three Trips to the Bathroom” by the Commodores
5.“How Can You Mend A Broken Hip?” by the Bee Gees
6.“These Boots Give Me Arthritis” by Nancy Sinatra
7.“I Get By with a Little Help from Depends” by the Beatles
8.“Bald Thing” by the Troggs
9.“You Can’t Always Pee When You Want” by the Rolling Stones
10.“I Heard It through the Grape Nuts” by Marvin Gaye
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Old 09-07-2018, 10:47 PM   #894
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Daffynition - cockfight: fowl play.
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Old 09-07-2018, 10:49 PM   #895
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Daffynition - nasal spray salesman: one who sticks his business in people's noses.
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Old 09-08-2018, 04:36 AM   #896
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Knock Knock!
Who's There?
Arthur
Arthur who?
Arthur more cookies in the jar?
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Old 09-08-2018, 02:02 PM   #897
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A couple goes to an art gallery. They find a picture of a naked women with only her privates covered with leaves.
The wife doesn't like it and moves on but the huband keeps looking.
The wife asks: "What are you waiting for?"
The husband replies: "Autumn."
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Old 09-08-2018, 02:14 PM   #898
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How do trees go online?

They log-on of course.
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Old 10-17-2018, 07:49 PM   #899
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Old 10-18-2018, 02:49 PM   #900
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Q: Why didn’t the skeleton want to go to school?
A: His heart wasn’t in it.

Q: Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
A: He didn’t have any guts!

Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road?
A: To get to the body shop.

Q: Why didn’t the skeleton go to the ball?
A: Because he had no BODY to go with.
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