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Old 07-20-2018, 08:10 AM   #31
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Eustace Charleton Haney: (as he and Mr. Ziffel are going into Oliver's house) Make sure you wipe yer feet.
Fred Ziffel: You don't ever wipe YOUR feet!
Eustace Charleton Haney: That's 'cause I don't own a pig farm.
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Old 07-24-2018, 06:29 PM   #32
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Oliver & Lisa quote/lines:
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Old 08-10-2018, 06:25 PM   #33
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Oliver & TV kiddie show host:
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Old 08-11-2018, 06:25 AM   #34
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"Mr. Kimball: Tomatoes are the dumbest of all plants. Did you know their IQ is hardly above what a 6-year old child's is?"
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Old 08-11-2018, 03:41 PM   #35
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Eb: "Notice where Mrs. Ziffel is standing? Under the mistletoe!"
Fred Ziffel: "Why don't you mind your own business."
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Old 08-11-2018, 03:44 PM   #36
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"[Oliver Wendell Douglas's old tractor has just broken down again]
Oliver Wendell Douglass: There's something wrong with the carburetor.
Eb Dawson: Yeah, it needs a new tractor on it!"
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Old 08-13-2018, 09:52 PM   #37
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Oliver: "I left the city so I could get away from the insanity of living there. I bought a farm so I could have peace and quiet. What do I end up with? A pig talking to a rock!"
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Old 08-14-2018, 06:42 AM   #38
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"[the Douglases are looking for clothes to donate to a rummage sale]
Oliver Douglas: Why don't we give away this one?
Lisa Douglas: No that's the dress I graduated from high school in.
Oliver Douglas: How about this one?
Lisa Douglas: That's the dress I wore the first day of college.
Oliver Douglas: [holding a black, low-cut dress] What about this one?
Lisa Douglas: That's the one I got expelled in."
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Old 08-14-2018, 05:46 PM   #39
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Mr. Drucker: "Call the sheriff!"
Mr. Kimball: "Ok. SHERIFF!!"
Mr. Drucker: "No, on the telephone."
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Old 08-15-2018, 06:31 AM   #40
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'Call the sheriff.' 'OK. Sheriff.' 'No. On the phone.'
-Sam Drucker Hank Kimball
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Old 01-18-2019, 07:19 PM   #41
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Haney: "My phone bill's high enough without pigs comin' in here makin' calls"
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Old 01-18-2019, 08:01 PM   #42
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Lisa Douglas:
Could you keep it a secret from my husband? You see, I want to surprise him.

Ralph Monroe:
My lips are sealed.

Hank Kimball:
Now if we could only keep them that way.
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Old 05-30-2019, 09:54 PM   #43
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Lisa's catchphrase: "Hotscakes".
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Old 06-03-2019, 06:35 PM   #44
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Old 06-04-2019, 05:02 PM   #45
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Eb: Is there any sauerkraut juice left?
Lisa: No, I used it to make the hotcakes.
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