Your favorite Sophia quotes

[Ohio8]

Gloria**: "This woman's pathetic!" Sophia (sarcastic): "Ohhhhh big news. Tear out the front page."
"Not part of the show, people, not part of the show."
"What recovery? I'm back one hundred percent knock wood. (knocks on front door.) Come in."

"...family is sacred where I come from."

[vasastan]

I can't remmeber the ep but there's a scene with Sophia playing scrabble with Dorothy:

Dorothy: Ma, "disdam" is not a word.
Sophia: It certainly is!
Dorothy: Okay, prove it, use it in a sentence.
Sophia: You're no good at disdam game.

[80s_Fan]

[quote=guestguest]When Blanche and Sophia were dating the same man, and Blanche walks in wearing a nightgown in front of the guy.

Sophia: "Beat it, you fifty year old mattress!"

Same episode: Blanche says she's going to take a bath "with just enough water to barely cover my perky bosoms."

Sophia: "You're only gonna sit in an inch of water?"

[jmann]

Not sure if this was already used:

Blanche: Oh, just shut up! Shut up, you babbling, bobble-headed, bleach blonde...
[struggles for another word]
Sophia: Baboon.
Blanche: Baboon!
[storms out]
Dorothy, Rose: [stare at Sophia]
Sophia: She needed a 'B!

[Ohio8]

"Cartoons don't lie."

"Death sucks."

"With the story you get a point. With the anecdote, pure entertainment."
"...back home who owns a goat. In Sicily that makes you a yuppie."
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"Oh noooo." -- Phoebe Buffay "Ohhhh yeah." -- Harry Solomon

[catlover79]

.

[TheCafeDisco]

Dorothy: Ma, what is that you're knitting?
Sophia: A bottle cover for the sherry.
Dorothy: Why do we need to cover the sherry?
Sophia: Not the sherry here at the house, the sherry I take to the park. You drink out of a paper bag in the park and suddenly everybody's your friend!
Rose: Oh, Sophia, I don't think it's a good idea to drink in the park.
Sophia: Hey, I do it once a month with the girls from the Cloud Society.
Blanche: The Cloud Society?
Sophia: Yeah, we stake out a bench, knock a few sherries back and discuss what we think the clouds look like. One afternoon I thought I saw Pat Sajak riding sidesaddle on a dolphin!

best sophia line ever!

[catlover79]

I always crack up every time Sophia calls Stan a yutz.

[catlover79]

.

[McGillicuddy]

Dorothy just finishes explaining to Blanche the difference between
Lebonese and Lesbian, and that Jean is in love with Rose.

Blanche: Well have you told Rose?

Dorothy: No, we're not sure she can handle it.

Blanche: Oh, good! Why she's not as worldly and sophisticated about these things as I am!!!

Sophia: Absolutely not! It'll break Rose's heart to find out Danny Thomas is a Lesbian!!

[catlover79]

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[tonys37]

One of my favorites was in the episode "To catch a neighbor", after the girls decided to let the cops stay at their house as their headquarter, Al (the older cop) says you ladies wont have to change your lifestyles. We just need a bedroom, bathroom and use the kitchen for their base and sophia says "fine, we will just cook in the fireplace and pee in the broom closet". She was so awesome.

[ShamelessFanGirl]

Originally Posted by vasastan

I can't remmeber the ep but there's a scene with Sophia playing scrabble with Dorothy:

Dorothy: Ma, "disdam" is not a word.
Sophia: It certainly is!
Dorothy: Okay, prove it, use it in a sentence.
Sophia: You're no good at disdam game.

The quote is from Season 1 Episode 8: "Break In"

[andress_jade]

I love the episode where Frieda Claxton dies and the girls are trying to find her a casket at the funeral home. The funeral directors name is Pfeiffer with the "P" pronounced.

"Hey, P feiffer! How would you like a punch in your p face!"

I roll with laughter everytime. Hilarious!

[lauracrook]

Sophia is AMAZING!! I have seen every episode about 100 times and I STILL laugh at what she says- especially the ones where she can't control her flatulence haha Here are some of my favourites:

Dorothy: "gee if I close my eyes I'd swear I was in Ecuador.."
Sophia: "sorry that was me!"

Blanche: "shhhh listen...did you hear that sound?"
Sophia: "yeah and as long as I'm in my own bed I'll do what I want."

Rose: "what was that noise?"
Sophia: "that was me.....thanks for bringing it to everyone's attention."

Rose: "he could squeeze a nickel til the buffalo poops."
Sophia: "boy I'll tell ya- there's something to the power of suggestion...excuse me."

Rebecca (Blanche's daughter referring to her own baby daughter Aurora): "what a good girl she was this morning. she was just smiling and smiling.....I know sometimes it's just gas but she was so cute."
*(Sophia tugs on Dorothys blouse and just smiles widely at her)*
Dorothy: "It's not cute once you pass 80 Ma!"

Blanche: "I'm afraid you'll have to excuse Sophia, Jack."
Sophia: "oh you heard that...I thought I was safe backed up against these pillows."