Favorite Golden Girls Quote

[KristinHerreraFan]

[trying to get animals to breed]
Dorothy: What they need is an aphrodisiac.
Rose: An African what?
Dorothy: An aphrodisiac, Rose. Something that makes you feel sexy... like Spanish Fly.
Rose: [disgusted] Spanish flies?
Dorothy: Fly, Rose. One Fly. Spanish Fly.
Rose: Oh, come on Dorothy. I've been to Spain. It's not the cleanest country in the world, they must have thousands of flies.
Dorothy: It is not a fly Rose! It's a beetle!
Rose: They call it a fly but it's really a beetle?
Dorothy: Yes.
Rose: How do they know it's Spanish?
Dorothy: Because it wears a little sombrero, Rose!

[retrochick9]

In the one where Dorothy invites a guy over she is interested in but doesn't know he's a priest until he gets there...
Priest: "You look lovely."
Dorothy: "I look like the mother of a Solid Gold dancer."

The one where Blanche considers going out with the much younger guy...
Blanche: "This is strictly off the record, but he is nearly 5 years younger than me."
Dorothy: "In what Blanche, dog years?"

[CinD]

One of my favorites is in my signature. It's when Rose has broadcast the story about Dorothy and Stan being slumlords, and they're taken to court.

[andress_jade]

Here are a few more of my favs:

Rose is making breakfast and Sophia walks in. After the initial "Good morning, how are you", Rose asks Sophia if she wants some breakfast.
Rose:"You want some breakfast?"
Sophia: "Not if you're making it."
Rose: "Oh come on, it's an old family favorite. Chocolate chip pancakes, made with brown sugar, honey whipped cream, and maple syrup."
Sophia: "Rose if God wanted man to eat like that, he would have handed him his teeth in a baggie."

Same eppy:

Dorothy: "Morning everybody. Rose I hope you don't mind, I borrowed your golf glove. I have a date to play today."
Blanche: "With a man?"
Dorothy: "No Blanche, with a Venus Flytrap. Of course with a man."

More from this same eppy:
This is after Dorothy has told everyone that she is golfing with Raymond and how she met him.

Dorothy: "You know what girls. I really like him and I think he likes me."
Sophia: "Just don't ruin it and sleep with him."
Dorothy: "Of course not, Ma. I only do that with men I plan to scar psychologically."

I will post more later. I have so many.

[andress_jade]

Here are a few I found that I had forgotten about that I love...

Dorothy- “You'll have to excuse my mother she was a witness to the Hindenburg Disaster.”

Dorothy-“Ma, why did I marry Stanley?”
Sophia- “Because he knocked you up.”
Dorothy- “Why did I let that happen?”
Sophia- “Because he got you drunk.”
Dorothy- “Why am I discussing this with you?”
Sophia- “Beats the hell out of me.”

Blanche- “In the south we mature faster, I think it's the heat.”
Dorothy- “I think it's the gin.”

Sophia- (after Dorothy tells her about Margeruite putting a 'curse' on them.)
“What's this crap about you putting a curse on my daughter?”
Dorothy- “We're all going to be turned into kumquats.”


This is during the Hunka-Hunka Burnin' Love Fan Club and they are passing around a porkchop that Elvis supposedly took a bite out of.
Dorothy- “This has to be a fake, I mean Elvis would never leave this much meat on a porkchop!” (laughing)

Sophia- “Dorothy, your father's on the phone.”
Dorothy- “Ma, Pop's been dead for 15 years.”
Sophia- “Oh, yeah. I mean what's for dinner?”

The girls are paying for their purchases at the drugstore when Blanche mentions that they should buy some condoms.
Blanche(to Dorothy)- “Maybe we should get some protection.”
Rose- “What kind of protection?”
Dorothy- “Two armed Pinkerton guards.”

The episode where Blanche's sister Virginia visits and tells Blanche that she's dying.
Dorothy brings in a baby.

Dorothy- “Look what I have!”
Rose- “It's a baby!”
Dorothy- “This is Danny!”
Blanche- “What is that, Dorothy?”
Dorothy- “It's a flounder, Blanche.”
Blanche- “You can't have that baby here, my sister's coming!”
Dorothy- “Does she eat them?”

Rose comes back from her cruise with Arnie and she tells Sophia, Dorothy, and Blanche what she did while she was there.
Dorothy- “WHO CARES, ROSE! DID YOU AND ARNIE HIT THE SHEETS OR NOT!”

Dorothy is introducing Sophia to the guy that she thought stood her up on prom night when it was actually Sophia who turned him away.
Dorothy- “You've met my lying, vicious toad of a mother!”

[80sTrivia]

I love reading through everyone's favorite quotes from the show... it definitely gave me my laugh for the day...

[Impressions]

Some other funny quotes from the series:

Blanche: Oh Dorothy! Do you relize it has been four days since I've enjoyed the company of a man?
Dorothy: I know Blanche. Ive been marking the days off on my big ships of the navy calendar.

Blanche: This flyer in the mail says they're going to start a dirty dancing course down at Larson's dance Studio. What do you say Dorothy?
Dorothy: Aw no, I can't see myself swinging my hips and wildly gyrating my pelvis. I am not interested.
Sophia: And the world takes a collective sigh of relief.

Dorothy: Ma, Rose isn't talking to me.
Sophia: Enjoy it while it lasts. Now good night.
Blanche: Honey, oh hi Dorothy. Could I talk to you?
Sophia: No, go away.
Blanche: But I can't sleep Sophia and it's all because Rose isn't talking to me.
Sophia: I could care less now get out of my room.
Rose: Sophia?
Sophia: I'm not in. Wait for the beep then leave a message. Beep!
Rose: Hi, this is Rose.
Sophia: Rose, shut up and get in here.
Rose: I see you're with two double crossing ex friends of mine. I'll come back later.
Sophia: What do you think this is the 711? I'm not open all night.
Dorothy: Rose, we feel terrible about what we've done.
Sophia: What've you done?
Blanche: We're really sorry.
Sophia: Sorry about what?
Rose: Sorry isn't good enough. How can I ever trust you again?
Sophia: Trust who?
Dorothy: Please Rose, let's not talk about trust after the terrible things you wrote.
Sophia: Will someone please tell me about what the HELL you're talking about?
Dorothy: Blanche and I read Rose's diary.
Blanche: And she wrote some terrible things about us in there.
Rose: About you? I didn't write about you. I didn't even know you when I kept that diary.
Dorothy: What are you talking about?
Rose: That was my four h diary. I kept it one summer when I was raising two pigs for the country fair.
Blanche: You kept a diary about raising two pigs?
Rose: You know another way how to get a four h pig diary badge?

[Ajax2006]

Blanche:I still don't believe that you ever read a scientific journal.

Rose:Believe what you want,see if I care,hypersexual b*tch.


Blanche:Am I ugly?

Sophia:Yes!

[80sTrivia]

A friend posted these Blanche Vs. Sophia quotes on another message board, and they made me laugh, so I'm posting them here:

Blanche: I know - we could hitchhike! I could lift up my skirt, like in that Clark Gable movie, It Happened One Night. We'll have a ride in no time!

Sophia: Please! You lift up your skirt, and someone might mistake your thigh for the "On" ramp to the freeway!

---
Blanche: It is mind over matter, Dorothy. Now, you can get up off that couch. You're feeling better already, Dorothy! You're not sick anymore! You can... HEAL YOURSELF! WALK, DOROTHY, WALK!

Sophia: Hey, just because you put your makeup on with a butter knife, doesn't make you Tammy Bakker.

---
Blanche: I never had to pay a penny in backtaxes. I have a way with auditors. The last time I was audited I even got money back from the government.

Sophia: Blanche, it's not a refund when the auditor leaves two twenties on your nightstand.

---
Blanche: Are you crazy, what will the neighbours think if they see two men in my bedroom?

Sophia: They'll think it's Tuesday.

---
Dorothy (to Blanche): How long did you wait to have sex after George died?
Sophia: Till the paramedics came.

[GoldenGirlsFan92]

I always like the scenes where Dorothy & Sophia are sharing a room. Here are some quotes:
Dorothy: Ma
Sophia: Is It morning already?
I like the converstations that happen between the 2 of them, while sharing a room.

And ocrouse:
Blanche:I'm going to go take a bath where the water will just barley cover my bossoms.
Sophia: You mean you're going to take a bath in water of 3inches?
This ones very funny.

[Danispalace]

Im looking for a Quote and the name of the Episode where the 2 cops are staying with the girls i beleive geoge clooney was In this one
the qoute i m looking for is the one where the police officer asks dorthy who are you Princess Di.
I dont know what Episode it is so i cant Help there
Can any one post it for me
thank you
Dani

[80sTrivia]

Originally Posted by GoldenGirlsFan92

I always like the scenes where Dorothy & Sophia are sharing a room. Here are some quotes:
Dorothy: Ma?
Sophia: Is It morning already?
I like the converstations that happen between the two of them, while sharing a room.

I enjoy these scenes as well. In fact, some of my favorite scenes from the entire series are from when Dorothy and Sophia have to share a bedroom!!!

[GoldenGirlsFan92]

I also love scenes fron "the Golden Palace". The pilot episode, I love when Blanche is talikng to the pool man, and Sophia comes by once and says "Tramp", and then later comes back "Slut!". This always makes me laugh. THe Golden Palace is a great show, and I'm almost done with my tapes, and I really wish they had made a second Season.

[Rue_McClanahan]

In this episode Rose and Dorothy are installing a new toilet. The plumber delivers the toilet and they tell him their installing it themselves, so he puts the toilet down in the living room and says move it yourselves then. Sophia comes into the living room. She says something like this:

Sophia: You finally got a toilet in front of the TV. It's an old lady's dream come true.

[peachysquirt21]

Sophia: Blow it out your ditty bag. LMAO I love that word.