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Old 03-29-2014, 03:59 PM   #1
Drew Carey from Hell
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TV Sitcom Family Feud 2

Sorry it took me so long to form a new "Sitcom Family Feud", but I didn't have home internet for awhile, so...

Johnny: It's Time Once Again To Play "Sitcom Family Feud"! And Here Is Your Host...The Ghost Of Richard Dawson!

Richard Dawson Enters

Thank You, Thank You...yesterday we had the Warners from the sitcom "Bertstown" and back again today...The Warners!...

The Warners enter to their podium

Richard walk to Tony

Richard: Hi Tony, are you still working with your father?

Tony: You bet, I'll probably be eating good this year!

Richard: Looks like you're eating well right now!

Tony: Hey, lay-off the fat jokes!

Richard walks to Helen and resists hugging her

Richard: Hi again Helen, are you still working?

Helen: I have two jobs at the Community College and they both pay well.

Richard: Well that's good to hear.

Richard walks to Paul

Richard: Hi Paul...anything new and exciting in your world?

Paul: No!

Richard: Okay then...

Richard walks toward Dustin

Richard: Hi Dustin...still goonna marry Diandra?

Dustin: Yes I Am!

Richard: Well, tell me when that day comes.

Richard walks toward Margaret and just shakes her hand

Richard: So Margaret, still married and working?

Margaret: Yes, but now I work at another grocery store called Hiney's.

Richard: Okay, I may go there one day.

Richard walks towards John

Richard: And we have John, still mayor of Bertstown?

John: Yep, and soon maybe president.

Richard: Well...just try not to do anything dumb.

John: I won't.

Richard: Okay...that's the Warners and now we will meet the family who's competing against the Warners, the Kaniski Family from Glenlawn, California!

The Kaniskis, Nell Harper, and Joey Donovan enter.

Richard walks toward the Kaniski's podium

Richard: So this is the Kaniskis...and you are...

Carl: Carl Kaniski, Chief of the Glenlawn Police!

Richard tries to shake Carl's hand

Carl: Don't try to touch me!

Richard: Okay...and this is your wife Nell?

Nell: Oh No! I'm Nell Harper, the housekeeper for this family. I cook, I clean, I do almost anything...even sing and dance.

Richard: I'll Give You A Hug.

Nell: Okay...

Richard and Nell Harper hug.

Richard: And is this the son Joey?

Richard touches Joey Donovan's hair

Joey: No...I'm Joey Donovan, I was orphaned and Aunt Nell brought me into her home Right, Aunt Nell?

Nell: Something like that.

Richard: And you are?...

Samantha: Samantha Kaniski, the youngest daughter in the family.

Richard: Can I give you a hug?

Samantha: Probably dad wouldn't like it!

Richard: we have...

Julie: Julie Kaniski...the middle-child. I'm a Honor Student at Glenlawn High School.

Richard: I'd hug you as well, but since your dad is well...and last but not least we have...

Katy: Katy Kaniski, I love to go to the Glenlawn Mall...I once got lost there and even going there.

Richard: I'd say something, but...Let's Start The Feud!

Richard goes to the main podium, Tony and Carl walk up there and shake hands.

Richard: Okay, 100 people took a survey on this answer with 7 different answers on the board. Besides clothes, name something people put in suitcases.

Tony Buzzes In.

Tony: Condoms!

Richard: I never knew anyone who'd pack those.

Tony: I could get lucky with Addie tonight...we were talking before the show...maybe Nell...or both.

Richard: Thanks for me...condoms!


Tony: WHAT?!

Richard: Maybe you're NOT lucky. Now Carl, besides clothes, name something people put in suitcases.

Carl: A Gun!

Richard: Why would you do that?

Carl: I'm the Chief of Police.

Richard: me a gun...

The board says "Weapon" and 2 people have guessed it

Richard: Okay...are you gonna pass or play.

Carl: We will play!

Tony: And I passed...I had kielbasa and sauerkraut last night.

Carl: What Nerve!

Richard: It's okay...he did that yesterday too...

Richard walks towards the Kaniski's Podium

Richard: Hello again besides clothes, name something people put in suitcases.

Nell: Well, when I ran away, I took some toilet paper with me. So I'll say toilet paper.

Richard: me...toilet paper!

The Board shows that 1 person guessed toilet paper

Richard: Good guess Joey...besides clothes, name something that people put in suitcases.

Joey: Candy?

Richard: me...candy...

The Board says "Food" and 5 people have guessed it.

Richard: Samantha, besides clothes name something people put in suitcases.

Samantha: Makeup.

Richard: Okay, let's make-up for Makeup!

The board shows that 6 people have guessed Makeup.

Richard: That was a good answer, now Julie...besides clothes, name something people put in suitcases.

Julie: Books.

Richard: I do that too, show me...books!

The Board shows that 3 people have guessed books.

Richard: Okay Katie, there are two answers left on the board. Besides clothes, name something people put in suitcases.

Katie: Uh...underwear?

Richard: I think that counts as clothing...where I lived we called it underclothes, show me...underclothes anyhow!


Richard: That's just what I the Warners have a chance to steal...

The Warners are clamoring whether to go for toiletries or electronics for the steal.

Paul: Would You Just Listen To Me For A Second?! People Put Electronics Like CD Players, Laptops, Or Game Systems In Their Suitcase!

Tony: Okay...okay...we will conclude our answer with...toiletries...only because Nell said Toilet Paper.

Nell: Oh, Tony!

Helen: Oh, Tony!

Richard: For the me...the shaving cream, the toothpaste, the soap, the cologne, the toiletries!...

The Board says "Toiletries" and It's the #1 Answer!

Richard: Well, the Warners have won and what was the #2 Answer?

Tony: Heh heh...#2!

The Board shows "Electronics".

Audience: Electronics!

Richard: Well...The Warners are going to the Bonus Round again, so Kaniskis...I guess this is goodbye!

Chief: We could've won, but our daughter Katie mentioned an article of clothing!

Julie: Thanks a lot, Katie! We already knew underwear was clothes!

Katie: I'm sorry...

Chief: Not As Sorry As You're Gonna Be! You're Grounded For Life!

Nell: Isn't that a bit harsh?

Chief: No...She Blew The Game!

Tony: I hope to see you and/or Addie later...

Nell: We'll see...

Richard walks toward the Warner's Podium

Richard: Now Who's Gonna Play Fast Money?

The Warners Except Paul: Paul Is!

Paul: Very Well!

Paul walks towards the center by Richard Dawson

Paul: Might As Well Wear A "Kick Me" Sign!

Richard:...but you may win $10,000 if you can give us the right answers. Okay, I'm gonna give you 15 seconds and 5 questions, now say whatever comes to your mind when I read these questions....

:15 is seen

Richard: Name a Fast Food Restaurant that doesn't serve hamburgers...

Paul: Arthur Treachers!


Richard: Name a Hanna-Barbera Character!

Paul: Loopy de Loop!


Richard: Name a Country that's famous for its wealth...

Paul: Lichtenstein!


Richard: Name a sport that's played indoors...

Paul: Jai Alai!


Richard: Name a part of an automobile...

Paul: The Glove Compartment!


Richard:...Again Good and Interesting Answers, but it seems that no one put them on the surveys. So again...The Warners go home with $0, but get to play again tomorrow on "Sitcom Family Feud"! Goodbye Everybody!
Thank God for kids who love Obscure Things.

Lee Hazlewood (1929-2007)
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