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Old 05-02-2012, 11:15 AM   #361
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(a guy Terri is seeing keeps doing romantic things to try to keep her interested in him due to thinking something is going on between her & Zack)
Zack: (sees a picture on the table)What's this?
Terri:It's just something that guy I've been seeing drew me.
Zack:Why?
Terri:Well he's trying to act all charming to make make me wanna keep dating him because he thinks there's something going between us everytime he sees us together just because we live in the same apartment
Zack:So if we go to the Regal Beagle later and he sees us there,what's he gonna do?Draw you another picture?
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Old 05-07-2012, 04:03 PM   #362
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(Zack getting into a shout battle with a guy from across the street)
Guy:Hey Tripper!You're gonna be alone for the rest of your life while my son is getting married!
Zack:What is gonna be?The bride or the groom?!(the guy tries to throw something at Zack,but he dodges it)You missed me!(he throws something else but Zack dodges it)You missed me again!
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Old 06-06-2012, 02:01 PM   #363
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The Apartment
Jack:Zack you believe me.Do you?
Zack:Of course.
Jack:Really?
Zack:Yeah.Jack we've known each other our entire lives.Plus if you were to lie to Terri & Janet,I'm sure you could come up with a better lie since your best friend is a used car salesman.
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Old 06-08-2012, 07:53 AM   #364
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chain Gang Member
The Apartment
Jack:Zack you believe me.Do you?
Zack:Of course.
Jack:Really?
Zack:Yeah.Jack we've known each other our entire lives.Plus if you were to lie to Terri & Janet,I'm sure you could come up with a better lie since your best friend is a used car salesman.

Why the hell didn't Three's Company give Jack Tripper a cousin named Zack Tripper?
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Old 06-27-2012, 07:07 AM   #365
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Larry:Hey Jack
Jack:Hey Larry.What's going on?
Larry:I just bumped into Gretchen
Jack:Gretchen?Greedy Gretchen?
Larry:Yeah.She told me that Zack turned her down
Jack:What?Hey Zack
Zack:Yeah?
Jack:Why did you turn down Gretchen?
Zack:Because she acts like one of those girls who are easy like a sunday morning
Larry:And?
Zack:I'm STD free and I plan to stay that way

Last edited by Chain Gang Member : 07-14-2012 at 12:56 PM.
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Old 06-27-2012, 10:11 PM   #366
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chain Gang Member
Larry:Hey Jack
Jack:Hey Larry.What's going on?
Larry:I just bumped into Gretchen
Jack:Gretchen?Greedy Gretchen?
Larry:Yeah.She told me that Zack turned her down/
Jack:What?Hey Zack
Zack:Yeah?
Jack:Why did you turn down Gretchen?
Zack:Because she acts like one of those girls who are easy like a sunday morning
Larry:And?
Zack:I'm STD free and I plan to stay that way

Zack is a smart guy!
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Old 06-30-2012, 04:44 PM   #367
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Zack:So Jack.How's everything going with your girlfriend?
Jack:She's not my girlfriend.
Zack:Yeah.You say that until you become WE people.
Jack:WE people?
Zack:Yeah."WE can't make it to the party","WE never miss a match","WE don't like the color purple"
Jack:We only had two dates.
Zack:Like I said,WE.
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Old 07-01-2012, 09:02 PM   #368
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Originally Posted by Chain Gang Member
?
Zack:So Jack.How's everything going with your girlfriend?
Jack:She's not my girlfriend.
Zack:Yeah.You say that until you become WE people.
Jack:WE people?
Zack:Yeah."WE can't make it to the party","WE never miss a match","WE don't like the color purple"
Jack:We only had two dates.
Zack:Like I said,WE.

Keep them coming!
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Old 08-28-2012, 12:30 PM   #369
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Extra!Extra!
Mrs.Tripper:Jack you're coming back with me to San Diego.
Zack:No he's not.
Mrs.Tripper:Of course he is.Why wouldn't he?
Zack:He's a grown man who can make his own decisions.Plus I don't think it's possible for you both to fly away together on your broomstick.
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Old 10-02-2012, 11:09 AM   #370
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?
(at the gym)
Larry:I'll hold the punching bag for you.
Zack:I don't know if this will get all of my emotions out of my body.
Larry:Sure it will.Just visualize something that really annoys you and hit it as hard as you can.
Zack:I would but the bag is in the way
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Old 11-03-2012, 12:53 PM   #371
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?
Guy: Do you know what happened at the Regal Beagle when the robber came in stole the money?
Zack:Oh yeah.We were sitting at the table talking about our day at work and then this weird guy came in.We then felt sorry for him so we decided to help him get a job as a cab driver
All:
Zack:And as he was trying to get the first question right,he kept ask us the the question slower & slower because our answer was "slow down"
Jack:Zack!
Zack:What?
Janet:That didn't happen to us?
Zack:It didn't?
Larry:It happened on a TV show
Terri:Taxi.
Zack:Oh.Then I don't know what happened but that show was classic
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Old 07-04-2013, 02:44 PM   #372
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?
Zack:Larry when are you gonna give me back the $20 you owe me
Larry:I told you I'll pay you next week.If I pay you any earlier,it'll be when pigs fly(they hear an explosion then look out the window to see a pig fly).I'll be back with your money in a minute(leaves).
Jack:Why did we just see a pig fly?
Zack:Well Jack you know that guy who annoys me and beat me to the pig roast you wanted?
Jack:Yeah?
Zack:He bought one of Larry's used cars.
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Old 02-23-2014, 04:54 PM   #373
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?
Jack:You guys wanna stick around and see my date's tongue come out out of her mouth when she sees me?
Zack:I'd rather leave before my lunch comes out of mine.
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Old 05-17-2014, 04:02 PM   #374
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Urban Plowboy
Jack:Zack are you sure coming to Cindy's Aunt's farm is a good idea after what happened when we were kids?
Zack:Of course.That was a long time ago.I would never do anything to hurt Cindy.I love her and she makes me happy.
Jack: Yes I know how much Cindy makes you happy due to witnessing it yesterday.
Janet:So what happened?
Zack:Well Jack came home from Angelino's early and walked in while Cindy & I were...
Jack:I think she meant what happened when we were kids.
Zack:Well ok.Back then,I lived with Jack & his family for a while due to my parents passing away,and my aunt never gave me a party or presents because she said I wasn't worth spending the money on due to not being one of her kids although Jack & my uncle always snuck into my room aka the closet and gave me presents.Then one year,we went to her family farm making believe I was going to have a real birthday only for her & Lee to give me empty boxes and telling me I'm going to deal with disappointments all of my life.
Terri:So that's why?
Jack:Tell them the rest.
Janet:There's more?
Zack:Yeah.That caused me to snap and I snuck out to the stables,killed my aunt's favorite horse and she woke up the next day with a present which was the horse's head causing her to scream.Lee also screamed when he saw the other part of the horse that described what he is.
Jack:Yeah.But it caused you to spend months in a hospital,with a psychiatrist,and you were band from the zoo for a while.
Zack:Yeah.When I became a wrestler,my friend Andre "reasoned" with the owner.
Jack:Well remember me & Larry could've gotten you back into the zoo as well.
Zack:Jack I wasn't going to go there with a fake french accent and go by the name (in a french accent)Zaque Tripper.
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Old 05-25-2014, 12:17 PM   #375
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?
Terri:Zack did you just break my violin?
Zack:Well uh
Terri: Zack tell me the truth
Zack:Well ok.A Kiss song got stuck in my head and I just got caught up in the moment.
Terri:Well I can see that happening since I heard Jack singing Jessie's Girl in the shower earlier.
Zack:I'm sorry Terri.
Terri:It's ok Zack.I forgive you(kisses him on the cheek then leaves the room)
Zack: (softly)Wow.That was a close one.
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