Paris Hilton is riding through the country when her chauffeur sees a dog run out a farm onto the road. He steps on the brake, but he hits the dog. Getting out and looking at the dog, he can tell it's a female. The chauffeur tries to administer to her, but the dog is already dead. He tells Paris Hilton.
"Oh, crumb buns!" says Paris Hilton. "You'd better go up to the farmhouse and tell the farmer and his family, like, what happened."
The chauffeur goes to the house and knocks on the door. "Can I come in? I have something to tell you," he says to the farmer.
He goes in, and Paris Hilton ends up waiting in the car for three whole hours before her chauffeur returns. "What, like, took you so long?" she asks.
"I told the farmer and his family what happened," the chauffeur says. "The farmer hugged me and gave me some of his land. His wife cooked a big dinner for me, and their daughter wanted me to marry her. We just got engaged."
"Wow," Paris Hilton says, "even though you ran over their dog? What did you say to them?"
"All I said," the chauffeur replied, "was, 'I'm Paris Hilton's driver, and I just killed the bitch.'"