Favorite Roseanne quotes

[hotrodchic]

Hello all! Roseanne has said sooo many funny things through-out her series, I was just wondering what were some of your favorite quotes? One that comes to my mind is:
Jackie: "I'm going to do exactly what you would do. You would never let a man tell you how to run your life! I want someone who will love and support me no matter what, just like Dan does for you"
Rosy: "Are you insane! Do you know how many years I had to put into Dan? Do you think he came out of a box that way?"

lol, typical Bossy Rosy...would love to hear quotes that you all remember...

[hotrodchic]

I totally agree! Her last show had a really heartfelt, meaningful quote. :)

[Superbatboy]

I like....When those soap opera stars came on and they did an ending tag....

Roseanne: "Our daughter Becky left for a year and a half, and when she came back we barely recognized her"

[hotrodchic]

Was that that episode with the mom from Lassie, and Leave it to Beaver and two others, can't remember who they were? Where Roseanne is talking about her family?

[Bad_Company]

Originally posted by Adam1982
Roseanne talking to Fisher in "War & Peace 2" season 5.

"I'm a pretty good judge of people...That's why I don't like none of em..."

I also like that one:lol:

and.....(Roseanne thinks she is pregnant and her and Dan are waiting for the pregnancy test)

Roseanne: "Well this is not gonna happen again cause i am just gonna go get fixed"
Dan:"You mean get your tubes tied"
Roseanne:"Uh no i mean get my knees sewn together"
:rotflmao:

[MonarC]

Good one :lol:

[MonarC]

"life is full of boombies"

[doodosh]

The Mothers day episode where Becky and Darlean buy Roseanne a trip to the Salon.

*Dan gives Roseannes a nasty robe*

"Roseanne comes out and says look what Dan gave me"

Jackie- "Its nice, at least its flame retardant"

Roseanne- "Yeah, its really retardant"

:lol:

[stephy]

ok i'm not sure if this is word for word but...

darlene:uh...becky, dj made a sundial out of birth controll pills

dj:look' it has the days on already

darlene:wow, mom went to vegas without these, she really is a gambler

dj:there not mom's

Becky:dj! aunt jackie must be looking everywhere for these, you can't make your school project out of them, now go put them back where you found them.

dj:ok i'll put them bac in your drawer

Darlene:you're doing it with mark!

Becky: shut up darlelene

Darlene:you s*ut

[iloveTV]

From "Boo!"
Roseanne: "Becky, now are you going to go get dressed or are you going straight to Hell?"

From the one where Darlene and Becky keep breaking their curfew:
Becky: "Let's face it, even mom and dad can't eat for three hours. I'm going to call the police."
Jackie: "You can't...they don't like it when you do that."

and later...

Jackie: "Now, now, girls. Let's not over-react."
Darlene: "They're DEAD!"
(Just the way Darlene looks when she says that...cracks me up!)

later still...

Jackie: "Curfew is just a way of your parents saying they love you."
Becky: "I curfew, Darlene."
Darlene: "I curfew, you too, Beck."

HILARIOUS!