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View Full Version : Why Jerry has broken up with his girlfriends


BulletTrain
09-21-2002, 12:14 PM
* For eating peas one at a time.


* For being liked by his parents.


* For being his soul mate.


* For having been with and dumbed by Newman!


* For suggesting to share his toothbrush.


* For shushing him in front of the TV.


* For not tasting his pie.


* For not giving him a massage.


* For not kissing on the third date.


* For being too altrusic.


* For appearing to own only one dress.


* For having man hands.


* For having bad taste in commercials, Dockers'.


* For laughing like Elmer Fudd sitting on a juicer.


* For not laughing at all.


* For throwing her tooth brush down the toilet.


* For possibly having fake breasts.


* For not letting him play with her toys.


* For having "two faces" -- attractive in one light, ugly in another.


* For believing she got gonorrhea from a tractor seat.


*For making him choose between seeing her and speaking in an imaginary voice inspired by her belly button.


* For finishing his sentences.



* For being "too perfect" that her friends kept saying, "its so nice he's doing this for her."


* For not remembering her name


* For thinking his standup act is not funny.


* She thought Jerry was lying about being gay.


* For accussing her of kissing his cousin.


* Jerry almost calls Native American girlfriend "Indian Giver."


* Jerry steals her fungicide.


* Jerry wouldn't eat her Mutton.


* He threatens to tell on her for the hit-and-run.


* Her parents won't allow them to date because they made out during Schindler's List.


* His discount dry cleaning "wife."


* He couldn't show emotion.


* For stockpiling cases of Today sponges.


*She liked people thinking she was chinese, when she wasn't.


*She was too good.

Crimson and Clover
09-24-2002, 04:44 PM
hey bullettrain i really like these lists they are neato.