ClassicComedyFan2
02-12-2002, 06:49 PM
"Snowing Craziness"
Episode 4 of Gopher's Gateway
Written by
Sean Sporman
Sean Sporman sat at his computer desk, smiling happily at 7:12 in the morning. The days were not in the least bit dull since Friday of last week. A replicator, snow, a federation shuttle, command of the school and the chance to design a new one, defeating a terrorist, stopping a PSI2000 outbreak, having two beautiful girls like him and still more!
Today was to be no different. On what was going to be a bright and sunny day, the first day of what Sean called the 'Hueytown Olympics' was going to start. At 1:00 the events would be the first rounds of N64 Super Smash Bros., Skiball, Bowling, and Horse. Also, after Jordan had informed him that Meagan and Heather liked him, he was shocked, but that didn't make him any less shy, it made him be cautious around their boyfriends: John Barnes and Brian Diputs. And, there was always the chance a crazy thing would happen where Sean would need to use to cool phasers and shuttle.
"Ready to go, Sean?" His dad, Keith asked.
"Yes." Sean picked up a couple of PADDs and began to walk toward the USS Voyager, or his mom's car.
The two of them entered the car, buckled their seatbelts and as Sean liked to say 'prepared for departure sequence.'
"So, did you like last night's Voyager, 'Alice'?" His dad asked him.
"It was pretty good and that trailer for 'Riddles' looks very funny. 'Tuvok's out of his Vulcan mind on a special Star Trek: Voyager!'"
"So, Sean, Have you thought about what are you are going to name your new school?" The car sprinted out of the driveway and turned left on a course for the high school.
"Not really. We have some ideas and a general design proposal, but nothing solid yet."
"So, what are the ideas?"
"Well, let's see…Spormanworld Academy, Starfleet Academy 2000, New Pittman, Hueytown 2000, SRWAH school, and Sporman's Silly School. Needless to say, Jordan came up with that last one."
"Yes. I think he needs a bacon of hope!" responded Sean's dad. They both laughed.
Sean completed the morning announcements with a smile and returning to his captain's chair, Brian Diputs burst in the door. Sean pulled out his phaser in response.
Heather frowned and Meagan pulled out her phaser as well.
"I know, Heather!" He exclaimed. "Sean, you have to die!" Brian hurled himself over one of the four computer panels. He missed Sean and kissed the floor with a resounding smack. But, he prepared to get back up. Meagan shot her phaser, but missed only by a few inches.
"Sean, without your phasers you are useless." Brian swept Sean off of his feet by hitting Sean's leg. His phaser flew across the room. Just then, a folding chair flew through a window and hit Brian, knocking him unconscious, as he was about to punch Sean.
Everyone turned to see who had saved Sean from the crazed football player and ex-boyfriend of Heather Allgood. It had been Maegan Harris. "Thanks, Maegan." Sean said as he dusted debris off of one of his control panels. Then, he smiled and laughed. The laughter spread and soon everyone in the mess of an office was laughing his or her head off.
Mrs. Stevens sighed, annoyed at the schedule change. Oh, she didn't mind the Olympics themselves. It was the fact that she had to have her speech class during first period and did not have her English class period. And, some of her best students: Sean, Heather, both Meagan and Megan, and Jordan were all on the main staff were not in the class. But…
Sean Sporman walked through the door, followed by Megan Hall and Heather Allgood. He noticed John Barnes glaring at him for easily known reasons. But, they all sat down. "Hey, Sean? Is it true what I heard?" Joel Gray asked. "Did the business cards work?"
"No on the business cards but yes on the…" Sean smiled. "…fun factor."
"Both of them?" whispered Joel.
"Affirmative." responded Sean. Then, John picked up his desk and hurled it out of the window. "I'll destroy this school, Sean!"
Then, Joel picked up a marker and began drawing in his hair. Regina ran and jumped out of the broken window.
"Bloogy Boo! I see you!" Mrs. Stevens exclaimed as Sean shivered from a cold wind. She then ran down the hall continuing to repeat 'Bloogy' in her well-known British dialect.
Sean, Meagan and Heather, all on one side of the room, watched as the craziness unfurled around them. Now, more people were acting abnormal. Sarah was throwing things in nearly every direction from her purse. Brooke Stephens was throwing books from Mrs. Stevens' bookshelf. Tim McCown was telling amusing jokes in his Lil' Jimmy dialect. Jonathan Reeves was acting like a gorilla.
Jordan Reeves finally spoke as a group of five that were not acting crazy rushed out of the room into the hall. "Well, my brother isn't acting any different."
Sean laughed. "This is nuts! It reminds me of this Star Trek episode where--"
It was Heather who had interrupted him as a piece of paper flew above her head. "Is there any place where the craziness can't get to?"
They all laughed. "If you mean self-contained there is the baseball field where all the stuff is, yes."
"Sean, I knew you could come up with a solution." Meagan said. "Hey, look, it's snow!"
"Wow…" Sean said. "Ok. Sporman to Hawking, Five to beam to coordinate set fourteen."
Sean smiled with glee as the five dematerialized.
June Gabert looked out the window, watching the snow begin to fall. Just then, a guard entered the room. "Ok, Ms. Waters, Sean has proven you were under an external influence when you assaulted him. I'll transport you to the high school."
Rachel smiled and walked of the door.
"Hey, why is it snowing?" June asked. The guard turned his head and June attacked.
She flew from her bed and collided with the guard. They went down in a tangle of arms and legs.
"Help!" yelled the guard. Just as June got the guard's baton in her hand, two more guards entered the doorway, batons raised. June sighed in frustration; her attempted escape a miserable failure.
Brooke Thompson and Allen Johnston were the last to beam into the crowded baseball field. They looked up and saw the shuttle Hawking penetrating the force field and landing in the only open spot in the field. The top of the shuttle was covered with a thin layer of snow. As the aft door slowly came down, Sean emerged.
He walked over to another computer panel and saw what he had feared. "Hey, Sean, how did you get this video? From America's funniest?" Jordan was referring to several real-time video links of various sections of the school, where the snow-craziness had all but taken over.
"Seven class-four microprobes, invisible to the naked human eye. Now, Tellaribes--"
"Yes, very nice." rushed Jordan. "Can we beam everyone in here and will that stop it?"
"Since the force field blocks out the--whatever--we are not affected. If someone that was affected beamed in, the effects would wear off in about five minutes. And I have no idea why! As for transporting everyone in here, no, there is not enough space."
"Could we extend the force shield?" asked Brooke Thompson. "To make it go around the school?"
"We're pushing it as it is…we would have to have seven shuttles or a full-blown Oberth-class vessel to do it."
"Is there an antidote?" Heather asked.
"We don't even know the cause." Sean responded. Then everyone saw something shocking. "Everyone, look!" Meagan exclaimed. "Mr. Swiney is painting graffiti on the lockers."
Then, something beeped. Sean looked at the panel. "It's Mrs. Painter, apparently she is unaffected by the craziness. I'm going to beam her in." Sean stepped back in the shuttle, but when he pressed a button on a forward console, sparks flew. "Great." said Sean flatly. "Just great."
Mrs. Painter ducked as a bottle of water exploded over her head after slamming into the dry-erase board. Water sprayed everywhere, but thankfully Mrs. Painter used some papers to prevent her from getting soaked.
She once again pressed at the 'tricorder' Sean allowed her to borrow. She remembered what he said. 'Remember, if there is an emergency, we can get you out.' Suddenly, she felt herself dematerialize and then she saw Sean.
Sean smiled at his solution. "I had replicated a backup transporter a couple of days ago for a situation like this one."
"What is going on?" asked Mrs. Painter.
"It's snowing, which is very cool. But, people are acting very crazy, even more crazy that normal teenagers usually act." Mrs. Painter smiled, not many people stereotyped his or her own group, but Sean was nothing like the normal teen.
"How come people in here aren't going crazy?" Mrs. Painter inquired.
Sean explained the force shield to her. After that they stepped out of the shuttle. "Hey, Mrs. Painter." said Jordan.
Sean looked around the crowded baseball field. Jordan was talking to Mrs. Painter, Meagan and Heather was talking to each other, Allen was playing 'Super Smash Bros.' on the Nintendo 64, and Brooke was taking a nap. Meanwhile, outside the shield, snow fell heavily and had accumulated up to about four inches.
"Sean." Jordan finally said. "We have to do something."
"I concur. A plan must be made. And, I get to play in the snow!" Sean said.
James Spann was dumbfounded at this sudden winter storm in the month of October. The jet stream didn't change; there were no surprise arctic blasts or even a change in the earth's axis. Just for some mysterious reason, temperatures in half of the state dropped below freezing and snow gripped it.
"Greetings. I am James Spann, chief meteorologist of Alabama's ABC 33/40. A surprise winter storm has once again struck the Alabama region. A Blizzard Warning is in effect from all counties north of Montgomery County." He knew this was going to be a long day…
Sean materialized in the road outside the shield radius first. Thankfully, he had replicated environmental suits to protect everyone.
Knowing that the recharge time of the portable transporter was twenty seconds, Sean decided to have a daydream…
Three Klingon Torpedo ships approached Earth and issued an ultimatum. "This is Dukret of Tarqat, prepare to be destroyed unless you accept surrender!" The lead ship fired a photon torpedo, when a new starship flew in.
Sean Sporman sat on the sterile bridge of the USS Intrepid, a starship just like Voyager. "Klingon ships, this is Captain Sporman of the Federation ship Intrepid. You will leave this system or be fired upon." Almost instantly, a face of a Klingon appeared on the viewscreen.
"Federation P'taks! But, this is before you formed." After a tense second of silence the Klingon slammed his fist on the arm of his chair and the transmission was cut. Photon torpedoes then shook the Intrepid.
Klingon Torpedo ships were the front section of the classic Klingon D-7 class battle cruisers only with two micronacelles. "Meagan, shield status?" Meagan Hall, as beautiful as ever, responded. "Holding."
"Heather, fire phasers at the lead ship!" Phasers lanced out from the Intrepid, cutting right through the shields and leaving a scorchmark. Suddenly, another photon fired from another Klingon ship. It hit the Intrepid and caused the unoccupied Engineering station to overload, spraying sparks.
"Computer, activate manual flight control." Slowly, a console rose from the floor of the bridge and out of it popped what looked like a joystick. The ship turned and then fired phasers at both of the other ships.
"They're retreating!" exclaimed Meagan. "I knew you could do it!" As Meagan walked up to hug Sean, Sean heard another voice. "Hey, Sean! Sean!"
Sean's daydream faded away and he saw Jordan, clearly annoyed. "Sean, it's cold even in these suits, will you stop being ruler of the world and loved by all girls to finish this!"
Sean smiled. "Of course, Commander." Sean laughed. The five of them walked through the road to the school. None of them knew what to expect.
June Gabert kicked the wall in frustration. The heavy snow continued to fall. By her guess, it was six inches accumulation now. Sean was most likely very happy now; June thought. He was playing with his Trek toys and flirting with those cheerleaders and she was in a juvenile equivalent of a jail! Barbara Loweique interrupted June's thoughts. "Hey, June, listen to this." She pointed at an online television.
"This is Pam Huff of ABC 33/40. We're here at Hueytown High School where craziness is running wild. Apparently, this snow has affected the students abnormally. Thanks to some instructions and assistance from Sean Sporman, prodigy student principal of this school, I am in an area that is unaffected by the snow craziness. Back to you, John."
Barbara pushed a button and the TV flickered off. June smiled diabolically. "It's about time that prodigy got a taste of real teenagers. In full crazy mode." June laughed.
After beaming the reporter into the safe area and then erasing her memory after the transport and after she left, Sean entered Pine. What he saw was a mix of tranquilly and lunacy. Some people, including Mrs. Stevens, Robert Richardson and Jonathan Reeves were asleep, apparently exhausted by their craziness. Other on the other hand was still crazy, even more than the usual teenager was. Or, maybe not, thought Sean with a smile.
Sean saw one student running in circles. Another student was bouncing her ball off the locker and hitting herself in the head with it. Mister Swiney, no longer spraying graffiti on the lockers was throwing snowballs everywhere. Sean could not identify where the loud screaming, and the glass breaking was coming from.
Heather ducked as she saw a coat and a book fly over her head. As the group barely dodged a snowball from Mr. Swiney, they proceeded outside of Pine. As Mr. Swiney prepared to throw again, Sean stunned him on light stun with his phaser and smiled as Mr. Swiney fell softly into the snow. "I've always wanted to do that." Jordan sighed.
"Sean, could this be like the PSI2000 particles?" asked Jordan.
"No, while those particles act like alcohol on the brain, this is plain craziness. One could say it was a…wild party." Sean popped out his tricorder and scanned. His eyes widened. "Sweet Jenkies!" exclaimed Sean.
"What is it, Sean. Find another brilliant solution?" asked Meagan as Jordan toyed with the thought of throwing a snowball to knock some sense into her.
"I believe so. What we are seeing here, is K4 flu."
"K4 flu?"
"A flu on planet K4, according to the tricorder. It is a mild flu on that particular planet, but according to this it works very strangely on humans. It breaks down the ability of self-control, so anybody who is affected does whatever he or she wants to do. It was first encountered by the refit USS Enterprise, the first one, two months after the V'ger encounter, which was real!"
"So, this craziness can end?"
"Well, it won't cure normal teenage craziness, but yes Jordan it will stop and the Hueytown Olympics can commence. I'll have to beam up and replicate it first. Thank you, Farpoint station."
"Huh?" asked Heather.
"The cure was developed by a joint Bandi-Federation effort at the second Farpoint station." Sean said it as if everyone knew. Jordan did, but the rest didn't. "Oh, sorry."
Sean then tapped his combadge. "Sporman to Hawking, five to beam up."
Rachel Waters did not expect what she saw as she entered Hueytown High School. She did not see Sean or any of his 'staff' in the office; in fact the office was completely empty. And, the school was a mess. There was debris, balls, and various liquids, broken glass, fragments of clothes and many other things littered across the floor of the main building. The high school was messier than she had ever seen it before.
She assumed that Sean and his friends were forced out of the school, but Sean had told her of a way to check. "Computer, locate Sean Sporman."
"Sean Sporman is not in a ten kilometer radius of the school."
"Locate Jordan Reeves."
"Jordan Reeves is not in a ten kilometer radius of the school."
"What about Heather Allgood?"
"Heather Allgood is directly outside of Pine."
Rachel began to run out of the door. "Of course, it's only us girls who are left."
Sean and Jordan beamed back with what appeared to be flame-throwers in their hands. Just then, Sean saw Rachel run from another snow-covered pathway. "Be careful!" yelped Sean.
Rachel heeded Sean's warning and slowly walked to the group. "Your computers said you were not anywhere around."
Sean smiled. "Remember the Hawking?"
Rachel nodded. "Oh, I see. So, what on Earth happened here?"
"A bad case of K4 flu." She saw her confused expression and said, "I'll explain later. We have to cure the people, but it's under control. If anything, the Olympics will go as planned."
"Olympics?" asked Rachel. Slowly, Sean brought Rachel up to date.
Sandra Sporman, mother of Sean, sighed in relief as two her six grandchildren, Ashley and Courtney Deavers were taken into their dad's 4x4 truck. She knew it could get through the snow. Walking back to the living room, she saw Pam Huff talking about Hueytown High. She told about some craziness force driving all the students bonkers.
Much to her relief, Sean was on TV and seemed all right. He was wearing a starfleet uniform from one of his replicators. The replicators that changed everything.
Now, she no longer had to buy so much food and some of the things she had always wanted Sean had replicated for her. Money was in near infinite supply for stuff that did not need to be replicated.
She tapped the combadge Sean had replicated for her. "Hey, Sean? You there?"
Sean gasped as her heard his mother on the other side of the starfleet commlink. "Hi, mommy. Need something?"
"Thank goodness you are safe. Are you ok."
Sean blushed slightly. "Yes, Ma'am. Anything else?"
"Nope. Bye." Sean looked up and noticed the snow had stopped falling. "Come on. There is no time to waste!" The five of them went to the main office, through many inches of snow. Sean wondered what James Spann was thinking at that moment.
As they entered the office with the container of the antidote to the K4 flu. Sean opened it with a command and the invisible air-carried antidote began to permeate the 'main' building. "Computer, beam down six more containers, one in each building, one in the trailer area and one in the baseball field…just in case. Set for twenty-second release delay. Engage." The computer beeped in reply.
Sean and his friends waited. Sean's friends wondered if it would work. As for Sean, he had no doubt.
June Gabert rolled in frustration on her bed at the Hueytown Juvenile. Bored, she activated the television using a remote control.
"--The snow has stopped over the state. We do not know the cause, to be honest. This is James Spann for Alabama's ABC/3340. Now, the news at noon, but at 12:45." She pushed the off button on the remote.
"Sean." June mumbled to herself. "My revenge is not complete."
"Why do you hate him so much?" Barbara Loweique, who overheard the statement, asked.
"One reason is he beat me in a reading contest in eighth grade, by one line! One, as you would say, yolseling line! And, there was the time he beat me by one point in Social Studies…" Barbara sat back to listen to what could be an endless list.
"Principal's Log, Command Day four. The snow has ended and thanks to the quick actions of not only me, but also Meagan, Heather and…oh yeah…Jordan what's-his-name, we have stopped the K4 flu. While debris and many other liquids and solid substances litter the halls, we plan to execute the first day of the Hueytown Olympics. However, I can't help but wonder… the last time when the snow stopped, the craziness stopped. Was it the same here?"
Sean Sporman smiled with glee as he talked to both Mrs. Lindsay and the superintendent via videophone.
"Impressive." The superintendent said. "You have stopped yet another potentially deadly situation, one that could have destroyed the project."
"Yes." agreed Mrs. Lindsay. "You were definitely the right choice for this assignment. Lord knows I couldn’t have handled those phasers of yours!" All three of them laughed.
"So, will either of you be able to make it to the first day of the Hueytown Olympics?" They both nodded no.
"Too bad."
"Well, we have to go." The superintendent said. "Until tomorrow, Captain." He finished with a smile.
As the videolink terminated, Sean exited the room and went into the office. "So, shall the Olympics commence?"
To his surprise, the office was completely empty. "Jordan? Heather? Anyone?" Sean walked out of the office to find that Jordan, Heather, Meagan and Brooke T. were being held hostage…by June?
"June, how--" A phaser blast flew inches from Sean's head and struck a ceiling light, causing it to explode.
"No. It's not me, a hologram. Programmed to activate the next time you turn on this bad necklace." The hologram fired again. This shot fired out a window.
"You forgot one thing, June."
"Oh, and what would that be."
"That phasers disrupt holograms." Sean fired his phaser, which struck the pseudo-enemy square in the stomach. The hologram flickered and then disappeared.
"Sean." Jordan said. "Can't you make less dangerous enemies?"
Sean smiled as he began to help the ex-hostages off of the ground.
"Hueytown Olympics status report. Using holographic emitters we have the gym ready for the first day of the Hueytown Olympics. Opening ceremonies will commence in five minutes. End status report one."
Sean Sporman smiled as the last 'holo-necklace' was snapped into place. Looking around the gym, he saw that the holographic repairs to the gym were functioning normally. Hopefully, no one with phasers would come in blasting at the bleachers.
Looking up, Sean saw the pre-fab 'dura-flate' balconies. There were four of these, two on each end of the gym. They had taken under five minutes to inflate and install. They held seventy-five people each and a cool inflatable flight of stairs allowed access.
On the gym floor, Sean saw the three bowling lanes installed at the far end of the gym. A big screen television lies about two feet in front of the lanes, linked to four other televisions at needed places in the gym. Chairs sit in front of it, ready for people to play what Sean thought of the best Nintendo 64 game, Super Smash Brothers!
One lone Skiball machine, design based on the Chucky Cheese design, stood behind the N64 chairs. And, half of the basketball court was ready for Horse. Last, but not least, on one wall, lie the advanced replicated scoreboard, which changed for every event. Sean planned to start with Horse.
Sean tapped his combadge, smiling, after activating the Sean's Song's 99 recorded compact disk, lasting more that two hours. "Heather, phase one."
"Understood." She responded.
After about twenty seconds, the announcement began. "Greetings. This is Heather Allgood, second vice principal of Hueytown High School. All students proceed to the gym for the first day of the Hueytown Olympics. Teachers, come at your discretion."
Slowly, students trickled into the gym. Barriers, similar to the ones in bank lines, prevented them from accessing the Olympics area. Some teachers also came into the gym, as well as the three former adult assistant principals. It took a whole ten minutes for Sean's staff, the majority of students, and the teachers to all enter the gym and be seated. The cool devices and objects on the gym floor awed some students.
Sean looked at his friends and whispered. "Phase II." Jordan informed Mr. Swiney to get the students quiet and it worked. Within seconds, the ambient noise level of the Hueytown High gym was less that twenty decibels. "Greetings, once again." Sean began. "And, welcome to day one of five, or more, of the Hueytown Olympics!" To Sean's surprise and glee, cheering erupted. "Now, we will announce the teams before the events begin. Feel free to applause for your favorites!"
"For the Spormanworld team, first me--" Sean heard some students boo and some whoop "Sporman, Sporman!"
"Then, Jordan Reeves!" A few cheers went up.
"Heather Allgood!" Some cheers went up.
"Meagan Hall!" Quite a few cheers occurred.
"Allen Johnston!" The crowd was mainly quiet.
"And, Brooke Thompson!" A few cheers occurred.
"Now, by being here, you have a chance of being on the Randomites team! Come down as you are picked!" Sean had a list of people he knew had little or no school record.
He looked at the list, pretending to browse a long list to deceive the crowd.
"Tim McCown!" A few cheers occurred.
"Tiffany Self!" The crowd was only a little noisy.
"Courtney Gage!" A few isolated cheers and many boos.
"Sarah Lowe!" Some cheers went up and Sean saw Jacob Allison roll his eyes in the crowd.
"Cathy Fredrick!" Some cheers.
"Ashley Johnston." Again, some cheers.
As the six made their way to the gym floor, Sean continued. "The Noneonones. Friends of mine not fortunate enough to get on the staff. In the words of Mario, here we go!"
"Meagan Harris!" Cheers flew.
"Liz McGowen." Some cheers occurred.
"Ashley Hampton." Some more cheers.
"John Barnes." Some cheers, and a surprising boo from Meagan Hall. Sean could not help but smile.
"Jonathan Reeves." Some cheers, but not too many.
"And, last, but not least, Rachel Waters." Jordan sighed, but Sean continued to smile.
"And, now, the team you're all rooting for. The teachers!" Sean smiled as the crowd cheered, he had changed the team name eariler today.
"Mrs. Painter!" As expected, the crowd went wild.
"Mrs. Stevens!" Laughs were mixed with the cheers.
"Mrs. Ware!" More laughing and cheering.
"Mr. Morrison!" Cheers, but fewer laughs.
"Mr. Roller!" The crowd went wild at the teacher Sean did not even know.
"And, making a special appearance Mrs. Sullivan!" The crowd could now be declared legally insane. But, a quick blow from Mrs. Sullivan's dependable whistle, the crowd was silent in a heartbeat.
"Welcome to Phase III. Our first event will be round one of Horse. Four players, standard horse rules. The players will be picked randomly by my cool computer over here." Sean pressed a button on the keyboard. He had been using LCARS panels too much. Four names popped up. "For the Randomites, Courtney Gage. For the Noneonones, Ashley Hampton. For the Spormans, Sean Sporman." Sean smiled. Maybe he had tilted the computer a little. "And for the teachers, Mrs. Stevens!" Laughter and excitement filled the gym. As the four teams readied, Sean held a fuzzy dice borrowed from Hueytown Elementary. "Highest number shoots first."
Sean rolled a two. Mrs. Stevens rolled a one. Ashley rolled a five. But, somehow, Courtney rolled a six.
Courtney took the basketball and shot from the free throw line. It bounced off the rim. Next, Ashley shot from directly under the goal, but on its way down it missed the goal. Sean hurled the ball from half-court and it missed wildly, flying into the stands. Tiffany Kynard had caught it and thrown it back into 'play'. Mrs. Stevens shot a couple of feet from the goal and rang it. Cheers flew.
Courtney shot and missed, the ball bouncing off of the backboard. The scoreboard lit up a cool-looking H by her name on the custom scoreboard. Ashley shot from that spot and made it. She then moved back a couple of feet and shot, ringing it.
Sean missed the shot, and an H lit up by his name. Mrs. Stevens also missed and Ashley was the only one without a letter by her name.
June Gabert was flipping channels in room forty-seven of Hueytown Juvenile. Barbara was slumbering.
"Welcome to the Jigglypuff week on Poke'mon!" She changed the channel.
"This weekend…the Deep Space Nine first season marathon followed by a special Voyager--" She changed the channel once more.
"--Hueytown High School. This is live coverage of Alabama's unofficial Olympic games, day one." She threw the clicker in disgust, shattering it. Barbara Loweique was snapped out of her peaceful nap. "What's going on?" she muttered, beginning to wake up.
"That!" June roared, pointing at the television unit.
Barbara saw Sean and turned the television off with her remote. "You know, now that I think about it. Maybe Rachel was right, what were doing is wrong!"
"Traitor." June muttered softly under her breath, calming down. Then, her eyes softened. "Maybe so." She said aloud. "Maybe so."
The crowd was riveted. Everyone had h, o, r and s. Yes; the game had been that crazy. Sean had been the last one to get a successful shot. Mrs. Stevens was shooting now.
The teacher of both speech and english shot the basketball and rang it as the crowd cheered. Next, Courtney Gage shot and…missed. Jordan, at the microphone, said with some glee. "Courtney is out of the match. One point given to the Randomites!"
Ashley Hampton rang the shot. However, Mrs. Stevens missed it, the orange ball bounced off the rim. "Mrs. Stevens is out of the match! Two points awarded to the Teachers!"
Sean confidently placed himself at the extreme right of the free throw line and shot. It went in toward the goal…and bounced off the back of the rim and onto the gym floor. "Sean is out the match! Spormanworld gets three points! Ashley wins! Noneonones get four points! Round one complete!" The crowd cheered as Sean grabbed the microphone. "In two minutes, skiball!"
"The selections, please." Sean pressed the computer buttons again. "For Spormanworld, Heather Allgood. For the Noneonones, Meagan Harris. For Randomites, Sarah Lowe. For the Teachers, Mrs. Ware." The four stepped forward as Sean explained the event. They were each given a sack of four balls.
After the fuzzy dice throw, Mrs. Ware went first, Meagan second, Heather third, and Sarah last.
Mrs. Ware got ten, ten, ten and thirty for a total of sixty points. Meagan Harris got thirty, ten, twenty and a fifty for one hundred and ten points. Heather got thirty, thirty, thirty and twenty, giving her one hundred and ten points. Sarah got ten, ten, ten, and forty for sixty points.
"Sudden Death!" Sean announced. "First throw is only points. Who will win? Meagan Harris or Heather Allgood?"
Meagan stepped up and rolled the ball up the incline. It bounced and landed in the thirty. Heather then stepped up. She rolled the ball and it bounced, hitting the wall between thirty and forty. It then landed directly in the forty-point hole.
"Heather Allgood is the victor! Four points for Spormanworld. Three for Noneonones. Two each for Randomites and Teachers. And, now the scoring update! Noneonones and Spormanworld tied for first, with the teachers in second and the Randomites not far behind in third! Now, onto Super Smash Brothers!"
Sean walked over to the computer and pressed the button once more.
The superintendent of the Jefferson County Board of Education smiled. He was watching the live feed of the 'Hueytown Olympics'. He had supported the event, and Mister Redcross agreed himself a fan of Pittman's well-known faculty vs. student contests.
Just then, the assistant superintendent entered the office. "Greetings." He said. Then, he saw the coverage and moaned. "Don't you know he is interrupting valuable education time."
"Oh, come now! This board has needed a breath of fun for ages! Think of it: fun, publicity, profits and a good name all rolled in one and thanks to one boy and his friends." The head superintendent was in a very good mood.
"You sound like a trailer…there are more trustworthy adolescents, I'm sure of it."
"Yes, but one with an imaginary world, 24th century technology, A/B honor roll, outstanding citizenship and is popular with the ladies? Hmm?"
The assistant stammered out of the room, unable to awnser. But, now he had a mission…
Twenty seconds remained in the Super Smash Battle! Tim and John had already been knocked out the arena. Jordan, controlling Samus and Mrs. Sullivan controlling Mario remained.
Mario did a fireball attack, which damaged Samus further. Samus then ran into a bob-omb, and was hurled out of the stage.
"Gameset!" the game proclaimed. "This games winner is…Mario!"
"Here we go!"
"Exciting, isn't it, people! Four points for the teachers, three for Spormanworld, and two for Randomites and one for Noneonones! Victor is Mrs. Sullivan!" Just then, the bell releasing early bus riders rang. "Well, day two is tomorrow and look for it to last off-and-on all day on a special Friday! Until then, this is Sean Sporman, signing off."
Sean looked over at his friends. "Instead of rain delay…there was a snow delay!" Jordan rolled his eyes.
"Are they really going to last all day, Sean?" Brooke Thompson asked.
"Not all day, but off-and-on. If I'm going to be the principal of the new school for one school year, I might as well make a good impression. And, I've got full support from the superintendent. "
Sean noticed that nearly everyone had left the gym, except the people just getting down from the balconies at the far back of the gym.
"Sean, have you got some new event ideas?"
"Oh yeah, 47% attack, Jigglypuff attack, Obstacle Course, Mini-Golf and more."
"Sounds interesting. You know, I think you'll hate the weekend." Sean smiled.
"Goodbye." Sean said, as Jordan began to depart. He noticed Meagan and Heather were still in the gym.
"Hey, Sean!" Heather said. Both of them were smiling.
"Which one of us do you want to go out with? Decide tomorrow, Captain." Meagan giggled as they walked out of sight.
Sean merely stood still, mouth standing open and unable to speak…
Next Time on Gopher's Gateway:
The Olympics continue…
But, will there be an attack?
Will there be a potentially deadly prank?
And the question on everyone's mind…Who will Sean pick?
Find out…on the next exciting episode of Gopher's Gateway!
Episode 4 of Gopher's Gateway
Written by
Sean Sporman
Sean Sporman sat at his computer desk, smiling happily at 7:12 in the morning. The days were not in the least bit dull since Friday of last week. A replicator, snow, a federation shuttle, command of the school and the chance to design a new one, defeating a terrorist, stopping a PSI2000 outbreak, having two beautiful girls like him and still more!
Today was to be no different. On what was going to be a bright and sunny day, the first day of what Sean called the 'Hueytown Olympics' was going to start. At 1:00 the events would be the first rounds of N64 Super Smash Bros., Skiball, Bowling, and Horse. Also, after Jordan had informed him that Meagan and Heather liked him, he was shocked, but that didn't make him any less shy, it made him be cautious around their boyfriends: John Barnes and Brian Diputs. And, there was always the chance a crazy thing would happen where Sean would need to use to cool phasers and shuttle.
"Ready to go, Sean?" His dad, Keith asked.
"Yes." Sean picked up a couple of PADDs and began to walk toward the USS Voyager, or his mom's car.
The two of them entered the car, buckled their seatbelts and as Sean liked to say 'prepared for departure sequence.'
"So, did you like last night's Voyager, 'Alice'?" His dad asked him.
"It was pretty good and that trailer for 'Riddles' looks very funny. 'Tuvok's out of his Vulcan mind on a special Star Trek: Voyager!'"
"So, Sean, Have you thought about what are you are going to name your new school?" The car sprinted out of the driveway and turned left on a course for the high school.
"Not really. We have some ideas and a general design proposal, but nothing solid yet."
"So, what are the ideas?"
"Well, let's see…Spormanworld Academy, Starfleet Academy 2000, New Pittman, Hueytown 2000, SRWAH school, and Sporman's Silly School. Needless to say, Jordan came up with that last one."
"Yes. I think he needs a bacon of hope!" responded Sean's dad. They both laughed.
Sean completed the morning announcements with a smile and returning to his captain's chair, Brian Diputs burst in the door. Sean pulled out his phaser in response.
Heather frowned and Meagan pulled out her phaser as well.
"I know, Heather!" He exclaimed. "Sean, you have to die!" Brian hurled himself over one of the four computer panels. He missed Sean and kissed the floor with a resounding smack. But, he prepared to get back up. Meagan shot her phaser, but missed only by a few inches.
"Sean, without your phasers you are useless." Brian swept Sean off of his feet by hitting Sean's leg. His phaser flew across the room. Just then, a folding chair flew through a window and hit Brian, knocking him unconscious, as he was about to punch Sean.
Everyone turned to see who had saved Sean from the crazed football player and ex-boyfriend of Heather Allgood. It had been Maegan Harris. "Thanks, Maegan." Sean said as he dusted debris off of one of his control panels. Then, he smiled and laughed. The laughter spread and soon everyone in the mess of an office was laughing his or her head off.
Mrs. Stevens sighed, annoyed at the schedule change. Oh, she didn't mind the Olympics themselves. It was the fact that she had to have her speech class during first period and did not have her English class period. And, some of her best students: Sean, Heather, both Meagan and Megan, and Jordan were all on the main staff were not in the class. But…
Sean Sporman walked through the door, followed by Megan Hall and Heather Allgood. He noticed John Barnes glaring at him for easily known reasons. But, they all sat down. "Hey, Sean? Is it true what I heard?" Joel Gray asked. "Did the business cards work?"
"No on the business cards but yes on the…" Sean smiled. "…fun factor."
"Both of them?" whispered Joel.
"Affirmative." responded Sean. Then, John picked up his desk and hurled it out of the window. "I'll destroy this school, Sean!"
Then, Joel picked up a marker and began drawing in his hair. Regina ran and jumped out of the broken window.
"Bloogy Boo! I see you!" Mrs. Stevens exclaimed as Sean shivered from a cold wind. She then ran down the hall continuing to repeat 'Bloogy' in her well-known British dialect.
Sean, Meagan and Heather, all on one side of the room, watched as the craziness unfurled around them. Now, more people were acting abnormal. Sarah was throwing things in nearly every direction from her purse. Brooke Stephens was throwing books from Mrs. Stevens' bookshelf. Tim McCown was telling amusing jokes in his Lil' Jimmy dialect. Jonathan Reeves was acting like a gorilla.
Jordan Reeves finally spoke as a group of five that were not acting crazy rushed out of the room into the hall. "Well, my brother isn't acting any different."
Sean laughed. "This is nuts! It reminds me of this Star Trek episode where--"
It was Heather who had interrupted him as a piece of paper flew above her head. "Is there any place where the craziness can't get to?"
They all laughed. "If you mean self-contained there is the baseball field where all the stuff is, yes."
"Sean, I knew you could come up with a solution." Meagan said. "Hey, look, it's snow!"
"Wow…" Sean said. "Ok. Sporman to Hawking, Five to beam to coordinate set fourteen."
Sean smiled with glee as the five dematerialized.
June Gabert looked out the window, watching the snow begin to fall. Just then, a guard entered the room. "Ok, Ms. Waters, Sean has proven you were under an external influence when you assaulted him. I'll transport you to the high school."
Rachel smiled and walked of the door.
"Hey, why is it snowing?" June asked. The guard turned his head and June attacked.
She flew from her bed and collided with the guard. They went down in a tangle of arms and legs.
"Help!" yelled the guard. Just as June got the guard's baton in her hand, two more guards entered the doorway, batons raised. June sighed in frustration; her attempted escape a miserable failure.
Brooke Thompson and Allen Johnston were the last to beam into the crowded baseball field. They looked up and saw the shuttle Hawking penetrating the force field and landing in the only open spot in the field. The top of the shuttle was covered with a thin layer of snow. As the aft door slowly came down, Sean emerged.
He walked over to another computer panel and saw what he had feared. "Hey, Sean, how did you get this video? From America's funniest?" Jordan was referring to several real-time video links of various sections of the school, where the snow-craziness had all but taken over.
"Seven class-four microprobes, invisible to the naked human eye. Now, Tellaribes--"
"Yes, very nice." rushed Jordan. "Can we beam everyone in here and will that stop it?"
"Since the force field blocks out the--whatever--we are not affected. If someone that was affected beamed in, the effects would wear off in about five minutes. And I have no idea why! As for transporting everyone in here, no, there is not enough space."
"Could we extend the force shield?" asked Brooke Thompson. "To make it go around the school?"
"We're pushing it as it is…we would have to have seven shuttles or a full-blown Oberth-class vessel to do it."
"Is there an antidote?" Heather asked.
"We don't even know the cause." Sean responded. Then everyone saw something shocking. "Everyone, look!" Meagan exclaimed. "Mr. Swiney is painting graffiti on the lockers."
Then, something beeped. Sean looked at the panel. "It's Mrs. Painter, apparently she is unaffected by the craziness. I'm going to beam her in." Sean stepped back in the shuttle, but when he pressed a button on a forward console, sparks flew. "Great." said Sean flatly. "Just great."
Mrs. Painter ducked as a bottle of water exploded over her head after slamming into the dry-erase board. Water sprayed everywhere, but thankfully Mrs. Painter used some papers to prevent her from getting soaked.
She once again pressed at the 'tricorder' Sean allowed her to borrow. She remembered what he said. 'Remember, if there is an emergency, we can get you out.' Suddenly, she felt herself dematerialize and then she saw Sean.
Sean smiled at his solution. "I had replicated a backup transporter a couple of days ago for a situation like this one."
"What is going on?" asked Mrs. Painter.
"It's snowing, which is very cool. But, people are acting very crazy, even more crazy that normal teenagers usually act." Mrs. Painter smiled, not many people stereotyped his or her own group, but Sean was nothing like the normal teen.
"How come people in here aren't going crazy?" Mrs. Painter inquired.
Sean explained the force shield to her. After that they stepped out of the shuttle. "Hey, Mrs. Painter." said Jordan.
Sean looked around the crowded baseball field. Jordan was talking to Mrs. Painter, Meagan and Heather was talking to each other, Allen was playing 'Super Smash Bros.' on the Nintendo 64, and Brooke was taking a nap. Meanwhile, outside the shield, snow fell heavily and had accumulated up to about four inches.
"Sean." Jordan finally said. "We have to do something."
"I concur. A plan must be made. And, I get to play in the snow!" Sean said.
James Spann was dumbfounded at this sudden winter storm in the month of October. The jet stream didn't change; there were no surprise arctic blasts or even a change in the earth's axis. Just for some mysterious reason, temperatures in half of the state dropped below freezing and snow gripped it.
"Greetings. I am James Spann, chief meteorologist of Alabama's ABC 33/40. A surprise winter storm has once again struck the Alabama region. A Blizzard Warning is in effect from all counties north of Montgomery County." He knew this was going to be a long day…
Sean materialized in the road outside the shield radius first. Thankfully, he had replicated environmental suits to protect everyone.
Knowing that the recharge time of the portable transporter was twenty seconds, Sean decided to have a daydream…
Three Klingon Torpedo ships approached Earth and issued an ultimatum. "This is Dukret of Tarqat, prepare to be destroyed unless you accept surrender!" The lead ship fired a photon torpedo, when a new starship flew in.
Sean Sporman sat on the sterile bridge of the USS Intrepid, a starship just like Voyager. "Klingon ships, this is Captain Sporman of the Federation ship Intrepid. You will leave this system or be fired upon." Almost instantly, a face of a Klingon appeared on the viewscreen.
"Federation P'taks! But, this is before you formed." After a tense second of silence the Klingon slammed his fist on the arm of his chair and the transmission was cut. Photon torpedoes then shook the Intrepid.
Klingon Torpedo ships were the front section of the classic Klingon D-7 class battle cruisers only with two micronacelles. "Meagan, shield status?" Meagan Hall, as beautiful as ever, responded. "Holding."
"Heather, fire phasers at the lead ship!" Phasers lanced out from the Intrepid, cutting right through the shields and leaving a scorchmark. Suddenly, another photon fired from another Klingon ship. It hit the Intrepid and caused the unoccupied Engineering station to overload, spraying sparks.
"Computer, activate manual flight control." Slowly, a console rose from the floor of the bridge and out of it popped what looked like a joystick. The ship turned and then fired phasers at both of the other ships.
"They're retreating!" exclaimed Meagan. "I knew you could do it!" As Meagan walked up to hug Sean, Sean heard another voice. "Hey, Sean! Sean!"
Sean's daydream faded away and he saw Jordan, clearly annoyed. "Sean, it's cold even in these suits, will you stop being ruler of the world and loved by all girls to finish this!"
Sean smiled. "Of course, Commander." Sean laughed. The five of them walked through the road to the school. None of them knew what to expect.
June Gabert kicked the wall in frustration. The heavy snow continued to fall. By her guess, it was six inches accumulation now. Sean was most likely very happy now; June thought. He was playing with his Trek toys and flirting with those cheerleaders and she was in a juvenile equivalent of a jail! Barbara Loweique interrupted June's thoughts. "Hey, June, listen to this." She pointed at an online television.
"This is Pam Huff of ABC 33/40. We're here at Hueytown High School where craziness is running wild. Apparently, this snow has affected the students abnormally. Thanks to some instructions and assistance from Sean Sporman, prodigy student principal of this school, I am in an area that is unaffected by the snow craziness. Back to you, John."
Barbara pushed a button and the TV flickered off. June smiled diabolically. "It's about time that prodigy got a taste of real teenagers. In full crazy mode." June laughed.
After beaming the reporter into the safe area and then erasing her memory after the transport and after she left, Sean entered Pine. What he saw was a mix of tranquilly and lunacy. Some people, including Mrs. Stevens, Robert Richardson and Jonathan Reeves were asleep, apparently exhausted by their craziness. Other on the other hand was still crazy, even more than the usual teenager was. Or, maybe not, thought Sean with a smile.
Sean saw one student running in circles. Another student was bouncing her ball off the locker and hitting herself in the head with it. Mister Swiney, no longer spraying graffiti on the lockers was throwing snowballs everywhere. Sean could not identify where the loud screaming, and the glass breaking was coming from.
Heather ducked as she saw a coat and a book fly over her head. As the group barely dodged a snowball from Mr. Swiney, they proceeded outside of Pine. As Mr. Swiney prepared to throw again, Sean stunned him on light stun with his phaser and smiled as Mr. Swiney fell softly into the snow. "I've always wanted to do that." Jordan sighed.
"Sean, could this be like the PSI2000 particles?" asked Jordan.
"No, while those particles act like alcohol on the brain, this is plain craziness. One could say it was a…wild party." Sean popped out his tricorder and scanned. His eyes widened. "Sweet Jenkies!" exclaimed Sean.
"What is it, Sean. Find another brilliant solution?" asked Meagan as Jordan toyed with the thought of throwing a snowball to knock some sense into her.
"I believe so. What we are seeing here, is K4 flu."
"K4 flu?"
"A flu on planet K4, according to the tricorder. It is a mild flu on that particular planet, but according to this it works very strangely on humans. It breaks down the ability of self-control, so anybody who is affected does whatever he or she wants to do. It was first encountered by the refit USS Enterprise, the first one, two months after the V'ger encounter, which was real!"
"So, this craziness can end?"
"Well, it won't cure normal teenage craziness, but yes Jordan it will stop and the Hueytown Olympics can commence. I'll have to beam up and replicate it first. Thank you, Farpoint station."
"Huh?" asked Heather.
"The cure was developed by a joint Bandi-Federation effort at the second Farpoint station." Sean said it as if everyone knew. Jordan did, but the rest didn't. "Oh, sorry."
Sean then tapped his combadge. "Sporman to Hawking, five to beam up."
Rachel Waters did not expect what she saw as she entered Hueytown High School. She did not see Sean or any of his 'staff' in the office; in fact the office was completely empty. And, the school was a mess. There was debris, balls, and various liquids, broken glass, fragments of clothes and many other things littered across the floor of the main building. The high school was messier than she had ever seen it before.
She assumed that Sean and his friends were forced out of the school, but Sean had told her of a way to check. "Computer, locate Sean Sporman."
"Sean Sporman is not in a ten kilometer radius of the school."
"Locate Jordan Reeves."
"Jordan Reeves is not in a ten kilometer radius of the school."
"What about Heather Allgood?"
"Heather Allgood is directly outside of Pine."
Rachel began to run out of the door. "Of course, it's only us girls who are left."
Sean and Jordan beamed back with what appeared to be flame-throwers in their hands. Just then, Sean saw Rachel run from another snow-covered pathway. "Be careful!" yelped Sean.
Rachel heeded Sean's warning and slowly walked to the group. "Your computers said you were not anywhere around."
Sean smiled. "Remember the Hawking?"
Rachel nodded. "Oh, I see. So, what on Earth happened here?"
"A bad case of K4 flu." She saw her confused expression and said, "I'll explain later. We have to cure the people, but it's under control. If anything, the Olympics will go as planned."
"Olympics?" asked Rachel. Slowly, Sean brought Rachel up to date.
Sandra Sporman, mother of Sean, sighed in relief as two her six grandchildren, Ashley and Courtney Deavers were taken into their dad's 4x4 truck. She knew it could get through the snow. Walking back to the living room, she saw Pam Huff talking about Hueytown High. She told about some craziness force driving all the students bonkers.
Much to her relief, Sean was on TV and seemed all right. He was wearing a starfleet uniform from one of his replicators. The replicators that changed everything.
Now, she no longer had to buy so much food and some of the things she had always wanted Sean had replicated for her. Money was in near infinite supply for stuff that did not need to be replicated.
She tapped the combadge Sean had replicated for her. "Hey, Sean? You there?"
Sean gasped as her heard his mother on the other side of the starfleet commlink. "Hi, mommy. Need something?"
"Thank goodness you are safe. Are you ok."
Sean blushed slightly. "Yes, Ma'am. Anything else?"
"Nope. Bye." Sean looked up and noticed the snow had stopped falling. "Come on. There is no time to waste!" The five of them went to the main office, through many inches of snow. Sean wondered what James Spann was thinking at that moment.
As they entered the office with the container of the antidote to the K4 flu. Sean opened it with a command and the invisible air-carried antidote began to permeate the 'main' building. "Computer, beam down six more containers, one in each building, one in the trailer area and one in the baseball field…just in case. Set for twenty-second release delay. Engage." The computer beeped in reply.
Sean and his friends waited. Sean's friends wondered if it would work. As for Sean, he had no doubt.
June Gabert rolled in frustration on her bed at the Hueytown Juvenile. Bored, she activated the television using a remote control.
"--The snow has stopped over the state. We do not know the cause, to be honest. This is James Spann for Alabama's ABC/3340. Now, the news at noon, but at 12:45." She pushed the off button on the remote.
"Sean." June mumbled to herself. "My revenge is not complete."
"Why do you hate him so much?" Barbara Loweique, who overheard the statement, asked.
"One reason is he beat me in a reading contest in eighth grade, by one line! One, as you would say, yolseling line! And, there was the time he beat me by one point in Social Studies…" Barbara sat back to listen to what could be an endless list.
"Principal's Log, Command Day four. The snow has ended and thanks to the quick actions of not only me, but also Meagan, Heather and…oh yeah…Jordan what's-his-name, we have stopped the K4 flu. While debris and many other liquids and solid substances litter the halls, we plan to execute the first day of the Hueytown Olympics. However, I can't help but wonder… the last time when the snow stopped, the craziness stopped. Was it the same here?"
Sean Sporman smiled with glee as he talked to both Mrs. Lindsay and the superintendent via videophone.
"Impressive." The superintendent said. "You have stopped yet another potentially deadly situation, one that could have destroyed the project."
"Yes." agreed Mrs. Lindsay. "You were definitely the right choice for this assignment. Lord knows I couldn’t have handled those phasers of yours!" All three of them laughed.
"So, will either of you be able to make it to the first day of the Hueytown Olympics?" They both nodded no.
"Too bad."
"Well, we have to go." The superintendent said. "Until tomorrow, Captain." He finished with a smile.
As the videolink terminated, Sean exited the room and went into the office. "So, shall the Olympics commence?"
To his surprise, the office was completely empty. "Jordan? Heather? Anyone?" Sean walked out of the office to find that Jordan, Heather, Meagan and Brooke T. were being held hostage…by June?
"June, how--" A phaser blast flew inches from Sean's head and struck a ceiling light, causing it to explode.
"No. It's not me, a hologram. Programmed to activate the next time you turn on this bad necklace." The hologram fired again. This shot fired out a window.
"You forgot one thing, June."
"Oh, and what would that be."
"That phasers disrupt holograms." Sean fired his phaser, which struck the pseudo-enemy square in the stomach. The hologram flickered and then disappeared.
"Sean." Jordan said. "Can't you make less dangerous enemies?"
Sean smiled as he began to help the ex-hostages off of the ground.
"Hueytown Olympics status report. Using holographic emitters we have the gym ready for the first day of the Hueytown Olympics. Opening ceremonies will commence in five minutes. End status report one."
Sean Sporman smiled as the last 'holo-necklace' was snapped into place. Looking around the gym, he saw that the holographic repairs to the gym were functioning normally. Hopefully, no one with phasers would come in blasting at the bleachers.
Looking up, Sean saw the pre-fab 'dura-flate' balconies. There were four of these, two on each end of the gym. They had taken under five minutes to inflate and install. They held seventy-five people each and a cool inflatable flight of stairs allowed access.
On the gym floor, Sean saw the three bowling lanes installed at the far end of the gym. A big screen television lies about two feet in front of the lanes, linked to four other televisions at needed places in the gym. Chairs sit in front of it, ready for people to play what Sean thought of the best Nintendo 64 game, Super Smash Brothers!
One lone Skiball machine, design based on the Chucky Cheese design, stood behind the N64 chairs. And, half of the basketball court was ready for Horse. Last, but not least, on one wall, lie the advanced replicated scoreboard, which changed for every event. Sean planned to start with Horse.
Sean tapped his combadge, smiling, after activating the Sean's Song's 99 recorded compact disk, lasting more that two hours. "Heather, phase one."
"Understood." She responded.
After about twenty seconds, the announcement began. "Greetings. This is Heather Allgood, second vice principal of Hueytown High School. All students proceed to the gym for the first day of the Hueytown Olympics. Teachers, come at your discretion."
Slowly, students trickled into the gym. Barriers, similar to the ones in bank lines, prevented them from accessing the Olympics area. Some teachers also came into the gym, as well as the three former adult assistant principals. It took a whole ten minutes for Sean's staff, the majority of students, and the teachers to all enter the gym and be seated. The cool devices and objects on the gym floor awed some students.
Sean looked at his friends and whispered. "Phase II." Jordan informed Mr. Swiney to get the students quiet and it worked. Within seconds, the ambient noise level of the Hueytown High gym was less that twenty decibels. "Greetings, once again." Sean began. "And, welcome to day one of five, or more, of the Hueytown Olympics!" To Sean's surprise and glee, cheering erupted. "Now, we will announce the teams before the events begin. Feel free to applause for your favorites!"
"For the Spormanworld team, first me--" Sean heard some students boo and some whoop "Sporman, Sporman!"
"Then, Jordan Reeves!" A few cheers went up.
"Heather Allgood!" Some cheers went up.
"Meagan Hall!" Quite a few cheers occurred.
"Allen Johnston!" The crowd was mainly quiet.
"And, Brooke Thompson!" A few cheers occurred.
"Now, by being here, you have a chance of being on the Randomites team! Come down as you are picked!" Sean had a list of people he knew had little or no school record.
He looked at the list, pretending to browse a long list to deceive the crowd.
"Tim McCown!" A few cheers occurred.
"Tiffany Self!" The crowd was only a little noisy.
"Courtney Gage!" A few isolated cheers and many boos.
"Sarah Lowe!" Some cheers went up and Sean saw Jacob Allison roll his eyes in the crowd.
"Cathy Fredrick!" Some cheers.
"Ashley Johnston." Again, some cheers.
As the six made their way to the gym floor, Sean continued. "The Noneonones. Friends of mine not fortunate enough to get on the staff. In the words of Mario, here we go!"
"Meagan Harris!" Cheers flew.
"Liz McGowen." Some cheers occurred.
"Ashley Hampton." Some more cheers.
"John Barnes." Some cheers, and a surprising boo from Meagan Hall. Sean could not help but smile.
"Jonathan Reeves." Some cheers, but not too many.
"And, last, but not least, Rachel Waters." Jordan sighed, but Sean continued to smile.
"And, now, the team you're all rooting for. The teachers!" Sean smiled as the crowd cheered, he had changed the team name eariler today.
"Mrs. Painter!" As expected, the crowd went wild.
"Mrs. Stevens!" Laughs were mixed with the cheers.
"Mrs. Ware!" More laughing and cheering.
"Mr. Morrison!" Cheers, but fewer laughs.
"Mr. Roller!" The crowd went wild at the teacher Sean did not even know.
"And, making a special appearance Mrs. Sullivan!" The crowd could now be declared legally insane. But, a quick blow from Mrs. Sullivan's dependable whistle, the crowd was silent in a heartbeat.
"Welcome to Phase III. Our first event will be round one of Horse. Four players, standard horse rules. The players will be picked randomly by my cool computer over here." Sean pressed a button on the keyboard. He had been using LCARS panels too much. Four names popped up. "For the Randomites, Courtney Gage. For the Noneonones, Ashley Hampton. For the Spormans, Sean Sporman." Sean smiled. Maybe he had tilted the computer a little. "And for the teachers, Mrs. Stevens!" Laughter and excitement filled the gym. As the four teams readied, Sean held a fuzzy dice borrowed from Hueytown Elementary. "Highest number shoots first."
Sean rolled a two. Mrs. Stevens rolled a one. Ashley rolled a five. But, somehow, Courtney rolled a six.
Courtney took the basketball and shot from the free throw line. It bounced off the rim. Next, Ashley shot from directly under the goal, but on its way down it missed the goal. Sean hurled the ball from half-court and it missed wildly, flying into the stands. Tiffany Kynard had caught it and thrown it back into 'play'. Mrs. Stevens shot a couple of feet from the goal and rang it. Cheers flew.
Courtney shot and missed, the ball bouncing off of the backboard. The scoreboard lit up a cool-looking H by her name on the custom scoreboard. Ashley shot from that spot and made it. She then moved back a couple of feet and shot, ringing it.
Sean missed the shot, and an H lit up by his name. Mrs. Stevens also missed and Ashley was the only one without a letter by her name.
June Gabert was flipping channels in room forty-seven of Hueytown Juvenile. Barbara was slumbering.
"Welcome to the Jigglypuff week on Poke'mon!" She changed the channel.
"This weekend…the Deep Space Nine first season marathon followed by a special Voyager--" She changed the channel once more.
"--Hueytown High School. This is live coverage of Alabama's unofficial Olympic games, day one." She threw the clicker in disgust, shattering it. Barbara Loweique was snapped out of her peaceful nap. "What's going on?" she muttered, beginning to wake up.
"That!" June roared, pointing at the television unit.
Barbara saw Sean and turned the television off with her remote. "You know, now that I think about it. Maybe Rachel was right, what were doing is wrong!"
"Traitor." June muttered softly under her breath, calming down. Then, her eyes softened. "Maybe so." She said aloud. "Maybe so."
The crowd was riveted. Everyone had h, o, r and s. Yes; the game had been that crazy. Sean had been the last one to get a successful shot. Mrs. Stevens was shooting now.
The teacher of both speech and english shot the basketball and rang it as the crowd cheered. Next, Courtney Gage shot and…missed. Jordan, at the microphone, said with some glee. "Courtney is out of the match. One point given to the Randomites!"
Ashley Hampton rang the shot. However, Mrs. Stevens missed it, the orange ball bounced off the rim. "Mrs. Stevens is out of the match! Two points awarded to the Teachers!"
Sean confidently placed himself at the extreme right of the free throw line and shot. It went in toward the goal…and bounced off the back of the rim and onto the gym floor. "Sean is out the match! Spormanworld gets three points! Ashley wins! Noneonones get four points! Round one complete!" The crowd cheered as Sean grabbed the microphone. "In two minutes, skiball!"
"The selections, please." Sean pressed the computer buttons again. "For Spormanworld, Heather Allgood. For the Noneonones, Meagan Harris. For Randomites, Sarah Lowe. For the Teachers, Mrs. Ware." The four stepped forward as Sean explained the event. They were each given a sack of four balls.
After the fuzzy dice throw, Mrs. Ware went first, Meagan second, Heather third, and Sarah last.
Mrs. Ware got ten, ten, ten and thirty for a total of sixty points. Meagan Harris got thirty, ten, twenty and a fifty for one hundred and ten points. Heather got thirty, thirty, thirty and twenty, giving her one hundred and ten points. Sarah got ten, ten, ten, and forty for sixty points.
"Sudden Death!" Sean announced. "First throw is only points. Who will win? Meagan Harris or Heather Allgood?"
Meagan stepped up and rolled the ball up the incline. It bounced and landed in the thirty. Heather then stepped up. She rolled the ball and it bounced, hitting the wall between thirty and forty. It then landed directly in the forty-point hole.
"Heather Allgood is the victor! Four points for Spormanworld. Three for Noneonones. Two each for Randomites and Teachers. And, now the scoring update! Noneonones and Spormanworld tied for first, with the teachers in second and the Randomites not far behind in third! Now, onto Super Smash Brothers!"
Sean walked over to the computer and pressed the button once more.
The superintendent of the Jefferson County Board of Education smiled. He was watching the live feed of the 'Hueytown Olympics'. He had supported the event, and Mister Redcross agreed himself a fan of Pittman's well-known faculty vs. student contests.
Just then, the assistant superintendent entered the office. "Greetings." He said. Then, he saw the coverage and moaned. "Don't you know he is interrupting valuable education time."
"Oh, come now! This board has needed a breath of fun for ages! Think of it: fun, publicity, profits and a good name all rolled in one and thanks to one boy and his friends." The head superintendent was in a very good mood.
"You sound like a trailer…there are more trustworthy adolescents, I'm sure of it."
"Yes, but one with an imaginary world, 24th century technology, A/B honor roll, outstanding citizenship and is popular with the ladies? Hmm?"
The assistant stammered out of the room, unable to awnser. But, now he had a mission…
Twenty seconds remained in the Super Smash Battle! Tim and John had already been knocked out the arena. Jordan, controlling Samus and Mrs. Sullivan controlling Mario remained.
Mario did a fireball attack, which damaged Samus further. Samus then ran into a bob-omb, and was hurled out of the stage.
"Gameset!" the game proclaimed. "This games winner is…Mario!"
"Here we go!"
"Exciting, isn't it, people! Four points for the teachers, three for Spormanworld, and two for Randomites and one for Noneonones! Victor is Mrs. Sullivan!" Just then, the bell releasing early bus riders rang. "Well, day two is tomorrow and look for it to last off-and-on all day on a special Friday! Until then, this is Sean Sporman, signing off."
Sean looked over at his friends. "Instead of rain delay…there was a snow delay!" Jordan rolled his eyes.
"Are they really going to last all day, Sean?" Brooke Thompson asked.
"Not all day, but off-and-on. If I'm going to be the principal of the new school for one school year, I might as well make a good impression. And, I've got full support from the superintendent. "
Sean noticed that nearly everyone had left the gym, except the people just getting down from the balconies at the far back of the gym.
"Sean, have you got some new event ideas?"
"Oh yeah, 47% attack, Jigglypuff attack, Obstacle Course, Mini-Golf and more."
"Sounds interesting. You know, I think you'll hate the weekend." Sean smiled.
"Goodbye." Sean said, as Jordan began to depart. He noticed Meagan and Heather were still in the gym.
"Hey, Sean!" Heather said. Both of them were smiling.
"Which one of us do you want to go out with? Decide tomorrow, Captain." Meagan giggled as they walked out of sight.
Sean merely stood still, mouth standing open and unable to speak…
Next Time on Gopher's Gateway:
The Olympics continue…
But, will there be an attack?
Will there be a potentially deadly prank?
And the question on everyone's mind…Who will Sean pick?
Find out…on the next exciting episode of Gopher's Gateway!