PDA

View Full Version : R.I.P., Common Sense


tv star collector
12-31-2008, 07:36 PM
An Obituary printed in the London Times........ Interesting and sadly rather true

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has
been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since
his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be
remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
Why the early bird gets the worm;
Life isn't always fair;
and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more
than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in
charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but
overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy
charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended
from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for
reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job
that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children .

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent
to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform
parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and
criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a
burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to
realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her
lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his
wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers;
I Know My Rights
I Want It Now
Someone Else Is To Blame
I'm A Victim

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

Hollow
12-31-2008, 08:15 PM
some of the situations sound one-sided. if the one about the woman spilling her coffee is a reference to the mcdonald's incident, it definitely is. the coffee was much hotter than it should have been and the woman had to stay in the hospital for a week and get skin grafts to repair the damage. she sued because mcdonald's refused to help pay her medical bills. coffee just isn't supposed to be that dangerous. also, i looked up the story about the guy getting suspended for using mouthwash; turned out the school strongly prohibited liquids with alcohol in them.

Courtnee
12-31-2008, 09:18 PM
Omg this has been going around forever. Please put it to rest.

Mikado
12-31-2008, 10:51 PM
If common sense is dead, it was Bush jr who pulled the trigger ;)

sunshinefizzy
01-01-2009, 08:22 AM
Goodbye stranger, it's been nice.

Doodyville10019
01-01-2009, 10:17 PM
I think common sense died sometime in the 90s. I know it wasn't recent.

Janice Johnson
01-02-2009, 11:47 AM
I think common sense died sometime in the 90s. I know it wasn't recent.

Who IS that in your avatar, Doodyville? he's cute! :confused: :p :)