Frank Gannucci
03-31-2008, 12:32 PM
"Expectant Dad" & "The Adoption":
Ralph: "I was named after my dad. They just called us 'Big' Ralph and 'Little' Ralph."
Ed: "Who was your dad, 'Little' Ralph?"
"Double Anniversary":
Ralph: "Something smells good."
Ed: "It can't be me. I just got through working in the sewer."
"Brother Ralph":
Ralph: "We got money in the bank. Don't we?"
Alice: "Yeah, we do. $3.31."
"Pal O' Mine":
Ralph: "Butter on my finger?" (yells): "AT 89 CENTS A POUND?" (normally): "Will you stop throwing my money around? Is there any lard around here?"
Alice: "Yeah, about 300 lbs. of it."
"The Sleepwalker":
Doctor: "We must remove the mental block from the patient's subconscious mind. Do you follow?"
Ralph: "Not exactly but when you said 'Mental Block', I knew it had something to do with Norton."
"Finders Keepers":
Ralph: "You just shattered another dream tonight. 'The Candy Store Dream'
we will call this one. You shattered it. When I was a kid, my dreams were shattered. I wanted a pony. I called it 'The Pony Dream.' That was shattered. My parents were broke. Both dreams shattered. The story of my life is shattered dreams."
Alice: "All right Ralph. I understand and I will make it up to you. You forget this 'Candy Store' dream and every Sunday, I will treat you to a pony ride."
"Be It Ever So Humble":
Ralph: "When you own a house, you can go outisde, pick up some dirt and say: 'This is all mine.'"
Alice: "I can go out the door right now into the hallway and do the same thing."
"Be It Ever So Humble":
Alice (yells): "RALPH?"
Ralph (from bedroom, yells): "WHAT?"
Alice (yells): "WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR BREAKFAST?"
Ralph (from bedroom, yells): "WHAT DO YOU HAVE?"
Alice (yells): "BACON, EGGS AND SAUSAGE."
Ralph (from bedroom, yells): "OKAY."
Alice (yells): "WAHT'S OKAY?"
Ralph (from bedroom, yells): "BACON, EGGS AND SAUSAGE."
"Flushing Ho":
Alice: "You use the bathroom first one morning. The next morning, Ed will use the bathroom first."
Ralph: "There's the solution to all my problems. Now, I will only be late every OTHER day."
Ralph: "I was named after my dad. They just called us 'Big' Ralph and 'Little' Ralph."
Ed: "Who was your dad, 'Little' Ralph?"
"Double Anniversary":
Ralph: "Something smells good."
Ed: "It can't be me. I just got through working in the sewer."
"Brother Ralph":
Ralph: "We got money in the bank. Don't we?"
Alice: "Yeah, we do. $3.31."
"Pal O' Mine":
Ralph: "Butter on my finger?" (yells): "AT 89 CENTS A POUND?" (normally): "Will you stop throwing my money around? Is there any lard around here?"
Alice: "Yeah, about 300 lbs. of it."
"The Sleepwalker":
Doctor: "We must remove the mental block from the patient's subconscious mind. Do you follow?"
Ralph: "Not exactly but when you said 'Mental Block', I knew it had something to do with Norton."
"Finders Keepers":
Ralph: "You just shattered another dream tonight. 'The Candy Store Dream'
we will call this one. You shattered it. When I was a kid, my dreams were shattered. I wanted a pony. I called it 'The Pony Dream.' That was shattered. My parents were broke. Both dreams shattered. The story of my life is shattered dreams."
Alice: "All right Ralph. I understand and I will make it up to you. You forget this 'Candy Store' dream and every Sunday, I will treat you to a pony ride."
"Be It Ever So Humble":
Ralph: "When you own a house, you can go outisde, pick up some dirt and say: 'This is all mine.'"
Alice: "I can go out the door right now into the hallway and do the same thing."
"Be It Ever So Humble":
Alice (yells): "RALPH?"
Ralph (from bedroom, yells): "WHAT?"
Alice (yells): "WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR BREAKFAST?"
Ralph (from bedroom, yells): "WHAT DO YOU HAVE?"
Alice (yells): "BACON, EGGS AND SAUSAGE."
Ralph (from bedroom, yells): "OKAY."
Alice (yells): "WAHT'S OKAY?"
Ralph (from bedroom, yells): "BACON, EGGS AND SAUSAGE."
"Flushing Ho":
Alice: "You use the bathroom first one morning. The next morning, Ed will use the bathroom first."
Ralph: "There's the solution to all my problems. Now, I will only be late every OTHER day."