FAVE ROSEANNE MOMENTS...

[Ireneparalegal]

When Roseanne gets mad at her snooty neighbor and starts telling her how she paid too much for her house. This happens after the neighbor gets pissed at Roseanne for not realizing their house was being robbed.

The PMS episode. I love how she goes from one extreme to another. Especially how she gets all hot and bothered and wants to have some "time" with Dan, while the kids and Jackie are all waiting in the kitchen.

When Dan and Roseanne aren't speaking to each other because of Becky. Dan is letting Becky have her way. Roseanne is pissed that he does that. they are eating dinner and they use the kids to talk to each other. DJ asks what is going on? Darlene says they're playing a game. DJ asks if he can play...Roseanne says, "You're too mature to play."

[sweetdiggity]

them are good ones! :D



Two of my favorite moments:

Roseanne and Jackie go to the Health Spa. They go on the hike and when Roseanne says she wants to quit, the really fit lady says something like "I'm surprised you made it this far in your shape."
Roseanne replies with, "I'll snap your back like a potato chip, ya bitch." :rofl:

The episode where the big storm hits.

Roseanne:"You do that again and you're grounded till menopause!!"
Darlene:"Yours or mine?"
Roseanne:"Your dads!! :lol:

[Ireneparalegal]

them are good ones! :D



Two of my favorite moments:

Roseanne and Jackie go to the Health Spa. They go on the hike and when Roseanne says she wants to quit, the really fit lady says something like "I'm surprised you made it this far in your shape."
Roseanne replies with, "I'll snap your back like a potato chip, ya bitch." :rofl:

The episode where the big storm hits.

Roseanne:"You do that again and you're grounded till menopause!!"
Darlene:"Yours or mine?"
Roseanne:"Your dads!! :lol:
:rofl: :brent:

When Roseanne tells Dan in the Las Vegas trip:

"You know what, we should have taken separate trips...I go to Vegas and you GO TO HELL (telling Dan)"

[Ireneparalegal]

ah excyse me but i think you are bashing
WHAT THE F**K????? don't post what you don't know anything abt.

[Ireneparalegal]

i habve no idea what you're talking about

my favorate moment is when roseanne in the pilot episode tell dan
roseanne: oh but honey you cook dinner 3 years ago

the agin in the 8th season finle when they are having there fight
roseanne oh but honey you ciik dinner 11 years ago

i love this show it ,myfavorate i could wach it 20 times a day on like 100 channle it so crakin funny dog it the best tv show in the world
I have no problem reporting your a** so just keep it up and see how long you last here. No one thinks you are funny, is that your goal? You do this s**t on other threads too. Go back to the other boards who apparently don't like your crap there either.

[Ireneparalegal]

you cant tell me what to do iam older than you this is the only board i do to i never do it to anyone eles
you don't know my age and i don't know what age you are BEHAVING LIKE (a sick and sad four year old)...but you should go back to what other board you came from. No one cares for you or this crap.

[Ireneparalegal]

oh then u are a baby...i figured...u don't know anyone's age here. go away. your ass is already reported...SEE YA

[Jo_Luvs_Ketchup]

okay okay iam sorry for any ofentive and crul remark and name calling iam sorrys o plese forgive me
You really need to knock it off with the petty bashing. It's childish and immature. Just knock it off and you'll be fine, but if you keep it up, you won't have an enjoyable time here. :nonono:

[evilNpunk]

Um... yeah... :rolleyes: anyways.

One of my fav moments as at the end of the episode where Roseanne's cousin Ronnie comes to town and they start arguing... and Ronnie says:
You know why you weren't a bridesmaid in my wedding? Because there's not enough orange cheuffen in the state of Illinois to make your dress!
Roseanne just stand there, and finally says: Good one!

Another fav moment is when Dan & Roseanne are shopping for a new mattress. That whole scene is hilarious starting when Dan belly flops onto the water bed.

[Ireneparalegal]

Um... yeah... :rolleyes: anyways.

One of my fav moments as at the end of the episode where Roseanne's cousin Ronnie comes to town and they start arguing... and Ronnie says:
You know why you weren't a bridesmaid in my wedding? Because there's not enough orange cheuffen in the state of Illinois to make your dress!
Roseanne just stand there, and finally says: Good one!

Another fav moment is when Dan & Roseanne are shopping for a new mattress. That whole scene is hilarious starting when Dan belly flops onto the water bed.
Oh yeah, the cousin episode was hilarious. "I bow to the queen of all bitches"...LMAO

[evilNpunk]

Oh yeah, the cousin episode was hilarious. "I bow to the queen of all bitches"...LMAO
LMAO I know! I just love that scene!

[Ireneparalegal]

Dan: "Do I HAVE TO SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU???" "P M S"...Then DJ screams and falls outta the chair...I love it, just love it.


the smoking pot episode: Roseanne: "BIRDS BIRDS BIRDS"
Jackie: "The jig is up!!!!!"

[Rene]

Dan: "Do I HAVE TO SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU???" "P M S"...Then DJ screams and falls outta the chair...I love it, just love it.



lol yea cause they all seem genuinely shocked that he fell out of the chair

[Ireneparalegal]

lol yea cause they all seem genuinely shocked that he fell out of the chair
i wonder if that was a blooper (of course he fell outta the chair) and Roseanne decided to leave that in. It was so damn funny. DJ had his moments too.

[Rene]

i wonder if that was a blooper (of course he fell outta the chair) and Roseanne decided to leave that in. It was so damn funny. DJ had his moments too.
my guess is that it is a blooper

[darlenesthebest]

probably, cause riiight after he did that they went into the theme song imediatly after! so I would maybe think that if it was, then they maby stopped the scene er something but then decided to keep it anyway...but idk???

[Ireneparalegal]

you can see how "Crystal" reacts to his falling, she seems shocked!

[sweetdiggity]

the smoking pot episode: Roseanne: "BIRDS BIRDS BIRDS"
Jackie: "The jig is up!!!!!":lol:

Jackie sitting in the bathtub--
Jackie:"It's just me and my ganja." :lol:


Darlene(to DJ) :"Hey DJ, I heard you got caught playing with your instrument in band." :rotflmao:

[Ireneparalegal]

:lol:

Jackie sitting in the bathtub--
Jackie:"It's just me and my ganja." :lol:


Darlene(to DJ) :"Hey DJ, I heard you got caught playing with your instrument in band." :rotflmao:
:brent:

DJ's response to Darlene's above statement:
DJ: "I'm not in band stupid!!!!"
DJ: "Who told you I was in band!?"

Roseanne mentions Jackie's bladder and Dan states how he has done hundred some days of doing the exact same thing to which Darlene replies:
"Well, DJ is on his way to shattering that record"

[evilNpunk]

Darlene: Relax, how many people could he kill with just one free hand?

[Jason16]

Mine are:

The one where Roseanne and Dan go to buy a new bed and Dan shouts "BELLYFLOP" and jumps on a water bed.

The one where Roseanne dresses up as a guy on Halloween and goes to the men's room.

The scene where Jackie is trying to tell a relative that their father has passed away and she looses it on the phone.

[sweetdiggity]

The scene where Jackie is trying to tell a relative that their father has passed away and she looses it on the phone.

LOVE that one!! :rofl:

More Jackie...

Jackie's mad at Roseanne for giving Andy junk food...

Jackie: (to Roseanne)"AND YOU, ARE THE OREO-IEST!!!!":lol: :lol:

[Ireneparalegal]

Mine are:

The one where Roseanne and Dan go to buy a new bed and Dan shouts "BELLYFLOP" and jumps on a water bed.

The one where Roseanne dresses up as a guy on Halloween and goes to the men's room.

The scene where Jackie is trying to tell a relative that their father has passed away and she looses it on the phone.
"HE'S PASSED AWAY!!!!!!!!!" :brent

"He's fine...he sends his love."

[evilNpunk]

The one where Roseanne dresses up as a guy on Halloween and goes to the men's room.
OMG I love that one! That one makes me crack up so much.

Roseanne[as a guy]: What I wanna know is, what does she want to do with you when she's got a suitcase full of sex toys?
Guy: Is that supposed to be a joke?
Roseanne: Okay.

[80sTrivia]

The one where Roseanne dresses up as a guy on Halloween and goes to the men's room.




This is my favorite moment as well. I love all the Halloween episodes, but this one if my favorite of all time!!! :lol:

Roseanne [entering the men's room]: "PU... it stinks in here!" :lol:

[ashleysuperfreak]

I love every episode, but I love the one where the prince of muldavia comes into the diner and as he's leaving, jackie's like bowing and u can tell every other actor on the screen was like what are u doing, lol, I don't think that was in the script, but it was one of the funniest things ever.

another one was where roseanne was telling dj about having her period and he runs up the stairs sceaming and dan stops him and says he can;t do that and why and dj says she's telling me about her period and he's like carry on. lol. <3. xoxo.

[coffield3]

mine would be the episode where they go to disney land.I just love the part where winne the pooh comes up to darlene and she acts like o whatever then turns around and hugs him and says omg i love you,and the ending part where they are saying goodbye and shes giving him her address lol just really funny.
gee there are tons more but i wont bore you:wave:

[PATRICKtheCELIAC]

"Toto, We're Not In Kansas Anymore"

Becky starts talking about how she has to call Dianne and tell her that she will be coming over.

Roseanne responds with, "Well, you can tell her when her house flies by our window."

That's something my family jokes about everyime we have a tornado .. so, I relate to it well.

[Ireneparalegal]

I love every episode, but I love the one where the prince of muldavia comes into the diner and as he's leaving, jackie's like bowing and u can tell every other actor on the screen was like what are u doing, lol, I don't think that was in the script, but it was one of the funniest things ever.

another one was where roseanne was telling dj about having her period and he runs up the stairs sceaming and dan stops him and says he can;t do that and why and dj says she's telling me about her period and he's like carry on. lol. <3. xoxo.
:lol: :lol: :lol:

[sweetdiggity]

This (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_7g2Day_Dd0) is great. :lol:

[Ireneparalegal]

This (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_7g2Day_Dd0) is great. :lol:
:rofl:

The next youtube video there is the one where Jackie is in the tub...:lol:


I love the scene where Cathy Bowman tells Roseanne abt the surgery she will have because of something Roseanne referenced earlier: "stick up her butt".

[sweetdiggity]

:rofl:

The next youtube video there is the one where Jackie is in the tub...:lol:


I love the scene where Cathy Bowman tells Roseanne abt the surgery she will have because of something Roseanne referenced earlier: "stick up her butt".
:lol: :lol: That was TOO funny!
And of course I watched the scene of Jackie in the tub on youtube! ;)

[sweetdiggity]

I watched one of my favorite episodes last night: "One For The Road"

It's SO funny when Becky makes the tornados for her and her friend, Dana. The glass is FULL of alcohol and a tiny splash of soda! :rotflmao:

Roseanne(to Becky):"Maybe you and Dana shouldn't work together anymore I mean, she's been throwin' up all night... and you look like you've been reincarnated as a rag." :rofl:

Roseanne:"Well, we're gonna be at grandma's by 2:00 unless we get really lucky and we get into a head on collision." :lol:

[Ireneparalegal]

I watched one of my favorite episodes last night: "One For The Road"

It's SO funny when Becky makes the tornados for her and her friend, Dana. The glass is FULL of alcohol and a tiny splash of soda! :rotflmao:

Roseanne(to Becky):"Maybe you and Dana shouldn't work together anymore I mean, she's been throwin' up all night... and you look like you've been reincarnated as a rag." :rofl:

Roseanne:"Well, we're gonna be at grandma's by 2:00 unless we get really lucky and we get into a head on collision." :lol:
:brent I love that episode with them drinking. I did notice too how they just add a "dab" of soda. Well, now we know why they called it a TORNADO.:D :eek:

That head-on collision remark gets me everytime. :rofl: I mean, overall, it is very nasty remarks abt Bev, but those one liners are sure damn funny!

[coffield3]

I love them all!!! :crazy: :lol:

[SparkleFarkle]

you don't know my age and i don't know what age you are BEHAVING LIKE (a sick and sad four year old)...

Are you going to slap the **** out of her?:p :happyface :crazy:

[Ireneparalegal]

Are you going to slap the **** out of her?:p :happyface :crazy:
That is Solomon's words, not mine. Get your ass, oops, facts straight.


Here you are referencing that slap the sh*t outta Becky thread and this thread has nothing to do with that. And you have the audacity to point that same sh*t to me on that other Roseanne thread. :rolleyes:

[sweetdiggity]

That head-on collision remark gets me everytime. :rofl: I mean, overall, it is very nasty remarks abt Bev, but those one liners are sure damn funny!
They sure are!

One of my favorites was in the ep. where Roseanne told Dan and Jackie not to drink around Bev so they went in the garage and got drunk.

Darlene didn't want to bake with Bev and called her "Drunkin' Hines." :rofl:

[Ireneparalegal]

They sure are!

One of my favorites was in the ep. where Roseanne told Dan and Jackie not to drink around Bev so they went in the garage and got drunk.

Darlene didn't want to bake with Bev and called her "Drunkin' Hines." :rofl:
Drunkin' Hines...:rofl: :brent

[sweetdiggity]

From one of my favorite episodes: "Dear Mom and Dad"

{Roseanne's parents show up unannounced and sleep over. Dan and Roseanne are mad because they have to sleep on cots and Bev told them she was moving to Lanford...}


Roseanne:"If my parents move to Lanford, I'm gonna be sleeping on a cot for the rest of my life, because I'm gonna be in prison for blowin' 'em away!!"

:rofl:

[Ireneparalegal]

From one of my favorite episodes: "Dear Mom and Dad"

{Roseanne's parents show up unannounced and sleep over. Dan and Roseanne are mad because they have to sleep on cots and Bev told them she was moving to Lanford...}


Roseanne:"If my parents move to Lanford, I'm gonna be sleeping on a cot for the rest of my life, because I'm gonna be in prison for blowin' 'em away!!"

:rofl:
I just seen that episode the other day. :brent :rofl: That is hilarious!!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:

[sweetdiggity]

Jackie:"Ya know, cops have got a sayin': "You never pull a dead man out of a seat belt."

Darlene:"What do ya just leave them there?"

:lol: :lol:

[Janice]

I don't want to read this whole thread right now, but I love the ending of one show....where Becky's telling Darlene that she's pulled one over on their mother, opens her closet door and there's Roseanne. The smile on Roseanne's face was priceless. :lol:

I love when she told the snobby neighbor that she paid too much for her house.

The scene in the kitchen with Roseanne apologizing to DJ for hitting him always chokes me up.

[sweetdiggity]

I don't want to read this whole thread right now, but I love the ending of one show....where Becky's telling Darlene that she's pulled one over on their mother, opens her closet door and there's Roseanne. The smile on Roseanne's face was priceless. :lol:

The scene in the kitchen with Roseanne apologizing to DJ for hitting him always chokes me up.

Those are excellent!! :thumbsup:

[Ireneparalegal]

I don't want to read this whole thread right now, but I love the ending of one show....where Becky's telling Darlene that she's pulled one over on their mother, opens her closet door and there's Roseanne. The smile on Roseanne's face was priceless. :lol:

I love when she told the snobby neighbor that she paid too much for her house.

The scene in the kitchen with Roseanne apologizing to DJ for hitting him always chokes me up.
Roseanne to that snooty neighbor: "Oh yeah. Well I paid $20 for that piece of junk and you paid $200...THAT'S STUPID." :rofl:

[HIfanatic14]

That one episode where becky "cut the cheese" at school and was humiliated.

Crystal (comes in): "I heard about becky's accident at school. I'm sorry. I brought her a card"
Roseanne: "Oh yeah well we were thinking of putting her to sleep"

And then the epsiode, Thanksgiving 93' in Season 6 after Roseanne's mom (Bev) spazzes out at her mom (played by Shelly Winters) for telling Roseanne and Jackie about Bev getting knocked up.

Bev (livid): Mother you swore you would never tell them that! Doesn't anyone in this family care about me?! *storms out of the room*
Roseanne: *runs after Bev through the kitchen* I'm going after her Dan, release the dogs! *leaves the room*
Jackie: *follows them*
Fred: Jackie? is there anything wrong?
Jackie: *pushes past Fred* Get outta the way Fred i'm not missing this! *leaves the room*
Fred: *sits back down at the table with Dan*
Dan: Yeah Fred once you get one us pregnant you can't escape. *laughs insanely*

^ i don't know if those are the correct words for the scene but MY GOD! that was hilarious :lol:

[sweetdiggity]

D.J.: "Mom, Darlene called me a prevert."

Roseanne: "No honey, you're not a prevert - you're a pervert."

:rofl:

[Ireneparalegal]

It came to me last night when I was trying to sleep, the image of Jackie dressed like Gilligan in that Gilligan episode spoof, as she was running away and she had her arms in the air and was moving them around like she was a monkey. :brent